The Seven Deadly Dating Sins
                           #5
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Savior Syndrome: Shawna and Rasheed met at the hosptial where they were both employed. Rasheed was deeply scarred by his troubled childhood, and Shawna, who has always been attracted to the down-and-out type, figured if she could save him, he would be available to love her. So she became Rasheed’s girl-friend-therapist. And like others before him, Rasheed ended up ditching her because all patients leave their nurses when they get better.
What Went Wrong: Intimate relationship require that partners be peers. If one lover plays the role of emotional caretaker, its just enough distance between the two to genuine intimacy impossible. Caretake types are often unaware that the reason they do it is because they doubt they have anything else appealing about them to attract and sustain a man’s romantic attention. So they often their services instead of themselves. The arrangment is lopsided in another way too. It seems 90 percent of the relationship centers on the broken person’s needs and feelings. Once a hurting man has been helped back to strength, chances are he’ll start looking for a mate who matches has new and improved staus. He figures, I deserve more because look how much more man I am now.
Solution: If you have a history of dating wounded men, get help. Look to a good therapist, a minister or your closet friends to help you understand the roots of your rescuing behavior and help you break the habit. If you’re dating someone new, ask yourself honestly. Does Tommy sound like Randy? And always get candid feedback from some men in your life who are themselves in healthy relationships. They can tell you how you may come across, which is far more beneficial than your own assumptions.
By Ron Elmore
Inside the mind of cree 