My Daughter Blessed Me Today/BLOG

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Hey Family!

So, today my daughter asked me to pick her up from work because she had something for me. When I read the text, for some reason I skipped over that part, I was too busy thinking about having to get dressed.  She could tell from my text that I did not want to get out of the bed from my nap. ((LOL)) So when I got to her she couldn’t stop laughing. She said I know you were sleepy, but I have something for you at home. I laughed because she knows me so well. I told her that I thought she was playing about having something for me, and that I never paid that part any attention.

Once we got to her apartment which is directly around the corner from my apartment she went in while I waited. As she’s walking back to the car, I’m looking at watching me with a smile on her face. I didn’t know what was going on, and why she had something for me. She’s always giving me money, or buying me something, so I couldn’t figure this one out. As she gets in the car, she hands me this bag which is cute and small, not to mention my favorite color green. I opened it up and its one of my favorite perfumes in the world. Si!  By Giorgio Armani. I was so happy and so grateful!!! I could not stop laughing and looking at her. She amazes me. Always thinking about me. I hugged and kissed her.. then she says.. ” didn’t want to get out of bed today huh?” LOL She is sooooooooo funny!

Just then she hands me over a card and I’m wondering where is all of this coming from? I opened the card and this is what it read.

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I’m normally a cry baby, but this really shocked me! Then this falls out

She put $500.00 in the card!!! Thank you Lord! Thank you Jesus. As you can see in the background there are 2 money orders. I’m paying off my credit card debt and she knew that I had 2 more payments for the one and I’m done. She paid them for me. Not only that, but she put some money on my cash app card for FOOD ONLY! She made it clear that it was for food only! She told me that she wanted me to spend the money all on me, and next week she’s going to give me more than this. Not only that, but she also is paying my home Wifi bill. This is too much for me. She’s very persistent and would not ever let me give it back to her.

Now the LESSON IN ALL OF THIS…. READ CAREFULLY

I went home sat on the bed for HOURS thinking why is my daughter so good to me? For one, I’m good to my parents. I LOVE LOVE LOVE my parents. They also live around the corner from me. I take care of them and they’re always expressing this same thing to me. But I do it because they took care of us. I’m 50 years old and to me, I can NEVER EVER do enough for them. I have to get this in my head, because this is how my daughter feels about me. She’s my only child.  But as a parent I feel that was my job to take care of her, not be paid back later. In my mind, I want her to do her, I’m good. In her mind, she’s good, she wants to do me. My parents feel the same way. The point…Take care of your kids family, and they will take care of you.

I wrote a post not long ago,

https://lacreasewalker.com/2017/09/02/god-told-me-that-i-was-getting-in-the-way-with-my-foolishness-pt-1blog/   https://lacreasewalker.com/2017/09/03/god-told-me-that-i-was-getting-in-the-way-with-my-foolishness-pt-2blog/

about the time when I was in my early 30’s of how I was partying a lot, drinking, talking on the phone all day, having male company over at night, neglecting the time I spent with my daughter and GOD WAS NOT PLEASED WITH ME!!! HE knows I take pride in paying my bills on time and paying it off. But they were all shut off for non payment this time! I knew he wanted to talk to me, so I waited for him to speak for over 2 weeks. What he told me blew me away. He said that the person that NESHA is to be, I am getting in the way with my foolishness. Right away I stopped talking on the phone, cut off sex, and got back into doing things with my daughter. I knew one day God would show me what he meant by that. Everyday he shows me through her. She is amazing. She’s very educated and she’s the Director of her Department doing well for herself.

God told me for my OBEDIENCE ((I did it right away)) that I am seeing fruits from it. Now I understand. Now I get why she takes care of me the way she does. God places it on her heart. I don’t need anything and I’m so grateful to God. Take care of your kids while they’re young, this way they will take care of you and it will all be from their hearts. Just as I do my parents, my daughter do for me. I love her! Thank you Jesus! Thank you!

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Chopin Script Regular

 

 

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Happy Feelings/BLOG

lilcreeHey Family!! 🙂

So yesterday I went to the Home going Services of my friends mom. She lived a long time ( 79) and was the sweetest person you could ever meet. I’ve been knowing this family for over 20 years. And when I say this lady could make some mustard greens and potato salad…. ooooo weeee. The last time I saw her was when I took her and my mom to the movies. She will truly be missed.

To be absent in the body is to be present with the Lord. One of my favorite Scriptures.

 Tonight I talked to my gurl about doing ANOTHER Valentines for the Homeless Sunday February 14, 2016. We are so excited about this project because since we both live in apartments, we don’t have the space to make all of the 150 dinners for Thanksgiving. People have been calling me, texting and inboxing me about it. I felt so bad because we had been doing this for years. But on Valentines Day, I’m going to make it happen. We’re packing toothbrushes, toothpaste, soap, face towels, gloves,  hats, scarfs, socks, deodorant and this time FOOD. We will be putting together a nice hot meal for 50-75 Homeless people Downtown Detroit. I’ll keep you all updated and maybe you can put together something in your city. Its easy to plan and the pay off of seeing people enjoy Valentines Day with gifts and food is a wonderful feeling. Amen!

I’m so happy for my Sister… she’s finishing up her training at POLICE HEAD QUARTERS HOMICIDE… THANK YOU JESUS FOR BLESSING HER WITH THIS JOB.. THANK YOU LORD. HER PRAYERS HAS BEEN ANSWERED.THE PERFECT JOB FOR HER, BECAUSE SHE’S TOUGH AND NOTHING TO PLAY WITH! OUR PARENTS ARE SO PROUD OF HER! YES YES YES! YUP! 🙂

IMG_0784I’m still trying to help my BRIDE find her a outside venue for July. Its so hard, so I had to ask her that question, if push come to shove will she be willing to have a indoor wedding? She said yes, so hopefully after she looks at the one ( outside venue)) next week she can finally come to a conclusion so that we can get this WEDDING STARTED!

IMG_0661 I AM La’Crease ((( I DONT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING ELSE)))

Ummmm cuse meeeeeeeeeee! /BLOG

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When it comes to business I have to really be on my game. Sometimes you can appear friendly, too friendly, not aggressive on the surface but when it comes to business I am a beast and I know it.

In business you have to always  discuss facts and stay on the point. Because once you get off the point the other person can drive your story all over the place. Not gon happen with me. Sometimes I hate to go there because I can be very expressive in the face, because I’m always  a really nice person. I can come off as very aggressive and I don’t mean to be that way. But I find out that I let things build up and when its time to discuss it there’s no changing my mind. And I don’t if that’s a good thing.

I  Live downtown Detroit and there are a lot of new developments going on in the city. Many people are leaving the suburbs and moving to these downtown apartments which is causing the parking space to be an issue here.  In 2012 when I moved here you can park anywhere at any time inside of the gated parking lot and there was no problem. But now since the building is almost occupied which is 22 floors and 18 apartments there is no space to park. When I come home at 3 AM  I have to pray before I even get here to find a space. They tell us to park across the street which is a Hell to the NAW NAW and definitely not the back where I can’t see my car. I had my van stolen from here a few months after I moved in, and I wish I would park anywhere else except in the gate or in front of the building. They have extra security here and that’s perfect.

This morning when I got home I parked in front of the building along with seven other vehicles.  I went down this morning to run an errand ((( and to move the car))) security asked me about it and I told him there is no room in the parking lot to park anymore I will not park across the street  or in the back of the building. I will not have my car stolen like my Town & Country.He was here when it was stolen because he did the investigation on it. So he knew my frustrations, and understood. But not before I went there.

Just then the property manager came in saying that it was OK because of the issue. I really hated I had to go there but I had to let them know  there was no way I was parking in the back or across the street. Thing was when I said that my van was stolen, people looked at me like WHAT???? YOUR VAN WAS STOLEN FROM HERE? OOO weee I bet security or management wont go there with me again. They shut that conversation down in front of folks REAL QUICK!!! LOL

Now I tried to be nice about it, didn’t want to alarm others in the building, but this is the 3rd time I’ve been asked about my parking. My thing is this, you jammed packed this building knowing full well there is not enough parking for all of these people, then I will let it be known, WHERE I WONT BE PARKING AND WHY. I pay rent here and its NOT CHEAP! Don’t ask me to park across the street, where if something happen off the property they’ll say, “Well that’s not our property.” NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! I made it short and to the point. I don’t do all that 3 minute talking especially when I’m right. Make some parking space around here….. now that’s doing business. All they care about is fulling up the apartments…. AND I AINT MAD AT THEM… BUT DON’T TELL ME TO PARK ACROSS THE STREET. GOT ME MESSED UP! The new people don’t know any better..

La’ Crease does! 🙂

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My story of FORGIVENESS-RAPE 3/BLOG

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One day he came over and couldn’t find me, so he went a few doors down to my friends house (((his now sister -n- law))) and found me there. He was mad at me for not wanting to have anything to do with him. No matter how much he apologized to me, I didn’t want to hear it. He was really irritated with me, and decided that he was going to rape me again while my friend outside and her mother not home. How disrespectful is that?

He threw me down on the couch and tried his best to get my pants down, this time it was not going to happen. We then got into a fight. He pushed me and I pushed him back. My Sisters and friend heard it and went and told my dad, by this time I was able to get out of the house and go home. My dad was FURIOUS!!  He told my ex boyfriend to never come over here again. AND HE DIDN’T. My dad said to me…. and I’ll NEVER EVER FORGET……. WE’RE moving, and when it happen.. HE BETTER NOT HAVE MY NEW ADDRESS!!!!! My daddy meant that.

Just before we moved , I met a new guy. He was everything all in one. Tall, handsome, sweet as pie, nice, and crazy about me. We hit it off  well. I knew it was too early to start a new relationship, but I had to get over the last one, and this new guy helped me. I went to school everyday praying that I wasn’t pregnant by my ex boyfriend. How does a woman have a baby by the man who raped her? That means I would have to love the baby no matter what. I prayed and prayed. I worried everyday. How do I tell my parents? Why does a 17 year old have to deal with this? Everyday I woke up, it was the first thing on my mind. I came on and was so relieved.

Then I faced another problem. I hated the fact that my ex boyfriend raped me, and didn’t want him to be the last person inside me. After 3 months of seeing my new boyfriend I had sex with him. I wasn’t ready for that at all, but in my mind I had to do it. I became mean, and evil to everyone. I had MAJOR TRUST ISSUES,  I hated myself and others too. I never associated my anger with the rape until years and years later. On Dec 4 1985, I got pregnant with my first and ONLY child.  I had my daughter ON MY BIRTHDAY… September 3, 1986. martonenecree

Years and years had passed, before I saw my ex boyfriend again. When I first laid eyes on him, the rape was the first thing that came to mind. I hated him even more, and hoped to never ever run into him again. In my late 20’s I was having the time of my life. Me and my daughters father had broken up and I was meeting new guys. Funny thing looking back. Mainly Police Officers. I wonder what was my attraction to them. Security? I’m not sure. By the time I was in my early 30’s and I started slowing down, the night I was raped started coming back to my mind. Late 30’s I started eating more and picking up lots and lots of weight. Early 40’s  it was on my mind EVERY DAY. God always told me that it was going to come back like throw up. Everything that happened that night was going to come up. Because I had not dealt with it. I pushed it out of my mind for years. It was time….. and He was right!

One day God told me loud and clear, that when my ex boyfriend get out of jail he was going to come to my job at Walmart and through my line. For me to not be afraid. It happened just like he said. I even blogged about it on this site.. the same night GOD TOLD ME. When I saw him I froze, caught me off guard, couldn’t stop thinking about that night as he stood there waiting for his turn. I was so nervous, but my power never left from me. I was in control and I made it through the transaction.  I had been hearing over the years that he believed my daughter was his.  He told his family, his kids and our friends that I had his daughter. I never told anyone what he did to me, so it made me MAD!!!!!!!!!. Then people would think that we had consensual sex… WHEN WE DIDN’T. He’s the bold type to tell them how young he was , but raped and got me pregnant. Either way, it wasn’t true and I wished he would stop telling people that. I wanted to brush him and the whole story UNDER A RUG or BED SOMEWHERE!!!! Just as he was leaving my line, he said to me… Tell my daughter I said Hi, and I want to meet her. I know she’s my daughter. I WAS SO MAD AND SO ANGRY!!! I let him walk out of the store without saying a word. My daughter was in her teens by this time, and all the talk of my daughter being his, ….. PISSED ME OFF TO NO END!!!

PART 4 TOMORROW!

I AM CREE (( I don’t have to do anything else))

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Wedding Planning-Things I learned/BLOG

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So yes, I did a Wedding on Saturday and it was really a joy. Well worth the EXPERIENCE!  I really enjoyed myself and learned a whole lot.. about people, how important it is to communicate, and patience.

I learned early on that you have to have some tough skin doing this job dealing with lots of different personalities. Because if you don’t you’ll find yourself throwing up the DEUCE sign to your Bride and The Wedding! LOL The most important thing to ME.. IS COMMUNICATION. Sometimes I think that I am too……… DIRECT. I want to be this way, but at the same time not overwhelming. Sometimes people feel that just because they don’t have the answer to the questions that its a wrong thing. Its for you to think about it/consider it… if you don’t. Trust me the questions that I ask EARLY… will be the same ones you’ll HAVE TO face LATER.

When planning a Wedding its very important for the planner to know EVERYTHING. I don’t like being in position not knowing the answers. I want to be the BRIDES EYES AND EARS. I don’t ever want to call a Bride when she’s getting dressed to ask simple questions that I should know… unless it something that came up and I need a second opinion about it. This is why I ask a lot of questions through out the planning process. I can see so clearly the day of a Wedding. I can see the set up, the guest, the venue, I can see it all and inside of what I see, I CAN SEE TINY DETAILS that need ATTENTION.  When I feed the Homeless for Thanksgiving… we have fed up to 160 plus people. I know my vision and what I want to do. I know the menu and what all goes into a dish. For example.. If I make string beans, I want some kind of meat and potatoes ((( NO EXCEPTIONS))) to go in them. It has to be seasoned very well. I will never leave the store without these things going into my food. Now if  you are doing the cooking yourself (( paying someone )) and I know your menu I will make sure you have these things for the cook, even if its more money. We want it cooked right, no half stepping. This is YOUR NAME  and the COOKS name on the line. That was something that I learned to make sure I KNOW THE MENU.. SO THAT I CAN MAKE SURE THE BRIDE HAS PURCHASED EVERYTHING THAT IT TAKES TO GO INTO THAT DISH.

If the Bride has found vendors on her own, I want to know their names, company, and what time will they arrive at the venue. THIS IS IMPORTANT. I don’t want to open the door and look at them like……. “WHO ARE YOU?” Noooo, not La’Crease Walker. I want to have that look as if my eyes say……. ” I was expecting you!”

I have so much more to write about tomorrow. But again.. I enjoyed myself at Rana’s & Calvin’s Wedding, and I’m looking forward to Tosha and Jimel 7/16/16

I AM La’Crease ((  and I don’t have to do anything else))

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Cree’s Ramblings/BLOG

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Hey Family!!! I have lots to talk about tonight!! Lets jump right into it.

I’m a thinker, and this is one I’ve been thinking about for a while. Years ago when I was a young gurl before the age of 14, my dad always told ME.. that I had a sister out there. She was his step mothers  SISTER. It was a huge secret back in the day because at the time he was young and still at home, and if his dad knew this, he would have kicked him out of the house FOR GOOD. So the gurl had the baby, but it was a secret who the father was until later on in the gurls life when people started to talk.

For me…. I always wanted to meet her. I’m very close with my siblings and to find out that I have a sister out there was like heaven for me. I thought about her all the time. Asking my dad questions he didn’t want to answer sometimes. But one day he got a knock on the door.. and it was HER. Not only did she come for answers, but it was also told to her that her mom was raped by my uncle((( by marriage))) , and that it was a possibility that she was his child. My cousins (( his daughters)) wanted a blood test to know either way, but that never happened and it kinda devastated me.

One day she called and said that she was coming to Detroit to visit her family and that she wanted to meet up with me and my siblings at my dad’s house. We finally had the meet I PRAYED TO GOD FOR. I got to see her face to face, stare at her, hug her and just Thank God for that moment. But when she left, we didn’t communicate much at all, and when my uncle who she felt was her dad.. passed away…. she made it known that she felt HE was her dad. I was good with that part. Because I Thanked God for us meeting. God gave me exactly what I asked for… and that was to meet her face to face. But I expected more. I wanted to have a blood test taken, and if she was my Sister start a relationship with her,  my niece and nephews. I feel that I was “short changed” in a way. She decided not to take the test , and I had to be good with that choice she made. Its funny, how God will give you the desires of your heart, but he never reviled  the outcome. Thing is, he comforted me during those days after the meet. I cant be mad at him for how things turned out, because he gave me what I asked for… A MEET. There will always be a “what if” in the back of my mind  when I see her post on FB. I love her and Thank God all the time that I got a chance to meet her. 🙂  🙂  🙂  🙂

Which brings me to Tyler Perry.. another person who I always wanted to meet since I was introduced to Madea. I love me some Tyler Perry and the work that he brings to life on stage and on the screen. But since meeting my sister and having HIGH EXPECTATIONS… I’m good. Not that I don’t want to meet him, I want him to want to meet ME. I’m just not good with expecting something so great to happen (( a friendship with him and my sister as well)) and it not happen. If its God’s will.. it shall be. Other than that I’m Okay. I’m going to sit back and let God do this… I’m out of it. It feels natural that way 🙂 🙂 🙂

I AM La’Crease (( I don’t have to do anything else))

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Why I Say I AM La’Crease/BLOG

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Hey Family! 🙂

In today’s Blog entry I want to explain why at the end of my post I write, I AM La’Crease and I don’t have to do anything else. After thinking about it  deeply, well…… read it for yourself.

For as long as I can remember I’ve always been a person that’s very protective over the ones closes to me. I’m the kind of person who LOVES EVERYBODY. I’ve never been the one to play favoritism with my friends or family, and I’ve always kept it real. But I noticed that I was doing too much. Thinking too much, talking to much, just DOING TO MUCH. I had to find out what is it that makes me do what I do? I’m the oldest of 4  and I’m working on learning to STOP having a OVER protective Spirit. Now, its okay too have a Protective Spirit, but not OVERLY protective. In order to get it under control, I had to disconnect the phone calls with people EVERYDAY. I was one who could talk on the phone all day, everyday. Thing was, I was the one doing the listening. I realize that a lot of people come to me because of my motherly personality, the Godly advice I give, and for the fact that I treat everyone the same. I try to be the same person everyday. But I realize that I was doing too much. I realize that I over do it to make people COMFORTABLE… when they’re really just fine. I found out that I AM La’Crease and I don’t have to do anything else.

For example: If I’m at my mothers house, I will ask her 100 times if she’s okay? Does she need me to go to the store, does she needs to run errands, if she needs me to do anything. Even if she says no, I’ll ask one last time before I leave. I can talk to a friend about an issue, I have to keep checking up on that person, texting and making sure everything is okay. But I found out that… everything IS OKAY… I don’t have to do all of that. Its OKAY.. I have to tell myself that its okay, everything is fine, I don’t have to do anything else. We are GOD’S KIDS…. Why am I doing extra work? LOL  I’m always asking people “Are you Okay boo?” I’m always genuinely concerned.. but shoooooooooooooooooo after years and years and years…. I’m wore out from that. I have gotten to the point, where I don’t want to waste a lot of MY time “catering” to folks when THEY’RE NOT EVEN ASKING FOR ME TOO. Its me that has taken this too far. Everyone is okay, except me, who is trying to make sure they are.  LOL Now, I can sit back and really enjoy my life, without feeling that I have to take on others burdens or constantly ask or wonder if my loved ones are okay… GOD HAS THEIR BACK… THEY ARE JUST FINE….

SO…I say…. I AM La’Crease, and I don’t have to do anything else. Because I DON’T!

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