Ummmm cuse meeeeeeeeeee! /BLOG

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When it comes to business I have to really be on my game. Sometimes you can appear friendly, too friendly, not aggressive on the surface but when it comes to business I am a beast and I know it.

In business you have to always  discuss facts and stay on the point. Because once you get off the point the other person can drive your story all over the place. Not gon happen with me. Sometimes I hate to go there because I can be very expressive in the face, because I’m always  a really nice person. I can come off as very aggressive and I don’t mean to be that way. But I find out that I let things build up and when its time to discuss it there’s no changing my mind. And I don’t if that’s a good thing.

I  Live downtown Detroit and there are a lot of new developments going on in the city. Many people are leaving the suburbs and moving to these downtown apartments which is causing the parking space to be an issue here.  In 2012 when I moved here you can park anywhere at any time inside of the gated parking lot and there was no problem. But now since the building is almost occupied which is 22 floors and 18 apartments there is no space to park. When I come home at 3 AM  I have to pray before I even get here to find a space. They tell us to park across the street which is a Hell to the NAW NAW and definitely not the back where I can’t see my car. I had my van stolen from here a few months after I moved in, and I wish I would park anywhere else except in the gate or in front of the building. They have extra security here and that’s perfect.

This morning when I got home I parked in front of the building along with seven other vehicles.  I went down this morning to run an errand ((( and to move the car))) security asked me about it and I told him there is no room in the parking lot to park anymore I will not park across the street  or in the back of the building. I will not have my car stolen like my Town & Country.He was here when it was stolen because he did the investigation on it. So he knew my frustrations, and understood. But not before I went there.

Just then the property manager came in saying that it was OK because of the issue. I really hated I had to go there but I had to let them know  there was no way I was parking in the back or across the street. Thing was when I said that my van was stolen, people looked at me like WHAT???? YOUR VAN WAS STOLEN FROM HERE? OOO weee I bet security or management wont go there with me again. They shut that conversation down in front of folks REAL QUICK!!! LOL

Now I tried to be nice about it, didn’t want to alarm others in the building, but this is the 3rd time I’ve been asked about my parking. My thing is this, you jammed packed this building knowing full well there is not enough parking for all of these people, then I will let it be known, WHERE I WONT BE PARKING AND WHY. I pay rent here and its NOT CHEAP! Don’t ask me to park across the street, where if something happen off the property they’ll say, “Well that’s not our property.” NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! I made it short and to the point. I don’t do all that 3 minute talking especially when I’m right. Make some parking space around here….. now that’s doing business. All they care about is fulling up the apartments…. AND I AINT MAD AT THEM… BUT DON’T TELL ME TO PARK ACROSS THE STREET. GOT ME MESSED UP! The new people don’t know any better..

La’ Crease does! 🙂

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It’s NOT okay! BLOG

Lately, I’ve been having deep conversations with several young women, and it bothers me so deeply what many are allowing these men to do to them. As I listen, I can’t help but think about the time when I was their ages and allow men to say and do things to me as well. The hard part is, they have to go through the experience themselves. I can talk to them till I’m blue in the face, sometimes they listen to me, and sometimes they don’t. It is them who has to learn the lesson.

I always knew that there was an order in which abuse start. First come the cursing out, and calling the woman out of her name. Secondly, are the personal attacks, meaning personal things that was said is now used in a way to hurt the person mentality. Third, is the physical laying of the hands on the woman to tear down her appearance and self esteem. I really hope women pay attention to this. We have to stop being so gullible. Stop feeling that we have met the best man for us. If someone is calling you names, and punching on you, get out of that relationship because the one for you is still out there. We have to stop getting so attached so soon. That’s the very reason why its so hard for us to break apart when things go wrong. Its okay to forgive, but that doesn’t mean that you should stay with him. It is not okay to mentally and physically abuse a woman. The same goes for women abusing men. Talk to a family member or close friend if you’re going through this, talk to the person who is going to be truthful, honest and upfront.  And listen!!! Listen to these people who have already experienced it.  It just may save your life.

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Cree’s Ramblings/BLOG

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Hey Family!!! I have lots to talk about tonight!! Lets jump right into it.

I’m a thinker, and this is one I’ve been thinking about for a while. Years ago when I was a young gurl before the age of 14, my dad always told ME.. that I had a sister out there. She was his step mothers  SISTER. It was a huge secret back in the day because at the time he was young and still at home, and if his dad knew this, he would have kicked him out of the house FOR GOOD. So the gurl had the baby, but it was a secret who the father was until later on in the gurls life when people started to talk.

For me…. I always wanted to meet her. I’m very close with my siblings and to find out that I have a sister out there was like heaven for me. I thought about her all the time. Asking my dad questions he didn’t want to answer sometimes. But one day he got a knock on the door.. and it was HER. Not only did she come for answers, but it was also told to her that her mom was raped by my uncle((( by marriage))) , and that it was a possibility that she was his child. My cousins (( his daughters)) wanted a blood test to know either way, but that never happened and it kinda devastated me.

One day she called and said that she was coming to Detroit to visit her family and that she wanted to meet up with me and my siblings at my dad’s house. We finally had the meet I PRAYED TO GOD FOR. I got to see her face to face, stare at her, hug her and just Thank God for that moment. But when she left, we didn’t communicate much at all, and when my uncle who she felt was her dad.. passed away…. she made it known that she felt HE was her dad. I was good with that part. Because I Thanked God for us meeting. God gave me exactly what I asked for… and that was to meet her face to face. But I expected more. I wanted to have a blood test taken, and if she was my Sister start a relationship with her,  my niece and nephews. I feel that I was “short changed” in a way. She decided not to take the test , and I had to be good with that choice she made. Its funny, how God will give you the desires of your heart, but he never reviled  the outcome. Thing is, he comforted me during those days after the meet. I cant be mad at him for how things turned out, because he gave me what I asked for… A MEET. There will always be a “what if” in the back of my mind  when I see her post on FB. I love her and Thank God all the time that I got a chance to meet her. 🙂  🙂  🙂  🙂

Which brings me to Tyler Perry.. another person who I always wanted to meet since I was introduced to Madea. I love me some Tyler Perry and the work that he brings to life on stage and on the screen. But since meeting my sister and having HIGH EXPECTATIONS… I’m good. Not that I don’t want to meet him, I want him to want to meet ME. I’m just not good with expecting something so great to happen (( a friendship with him and my sister as well)) and it not happen. If its God’s will.. it shall be. Other than that I’m Okay. I’m going to sit back and let God do this… I’m out of it. It feels natural that way 🙂 🙂 🙂

I AM La’Crease (( I don’t have to do anything else))

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#HAHN/Cree’s Ramblings/BLOG

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Hey Family!!

Tyler Perry’s #HAHN came back on tonight on OWN. I don’t usually do reviews on these shows, but tonight was good!! Veronica….. is out cold!!! I love looking into her eyes and seeing her put everything into her acting. She is something. That cigarette she holds in her hand tells me, that she’s calm and thinking about “Whats next”. Her sneaky “don’t know what she’s up to next” smile kills me!!! That ice stare is spooky!!!  I saw myself in her  BACK IN THE DAY * not to the extreme*. Don’t get me twisted… I will never burn down a house with anyone in it, especially where I live. Its just that I can look in her eyes and see pain, I see a loss of control, I see someone who thinks they have so many connections that her dirt will never catch up. I see a floor that dropped from under her, she lived through it, and now she has no breaks on her actions. I can see that its starting to feel good to her to be bad. OMG, now she’s messing with Benny…. she’s out cold!! Great actress.

Okay…. I said it first. I think that Amanda and Wyatt are Celine kids. OR…. only Wyatt. One of those kids is Jim and Celine’s. Tonight when she came over, it was something about the atmosphere that made me think that something aint right. It’s some deep dark secrets going on with this family. We haven’t seen the last of Celine.. She has some bombs to drop and I can see it all over her face. Its more than just that son she has, that we haven’t seen much of. Um um… juicy!

#LAHHATL I’m so happy MIMI told her own story.. now no one can come after her for her lies, and no more blackmailing her. She told Stevie J, her BFF, and later she will tell her daughter. It made me mad all the POWER MEKO UGLLLLLLLLLLLY butt had over her. Go out and get your own money, stop trying to keep a story line to stay on TV and to make money. I didn’t care for him then, and especially not now. Kirk Frost get on my nerves.. but if Rasheeda loves him… what can I say? LOL She’s my gurl, so she’ll handle him.

As for me… I have been taking it easy, just working, trying to get my apartment together. Haven’t been going to the park to spend my quiet time with God as I normally do, but I will this next week for sure. On my way to bed…. working midnight’s will have you up late especially on your off days!!!

My BrideRANA J (( I’m her Wedding Coordinator)) Rana day is coming fast, after this week, its time to get on the ball. I need to do some personal things to prepare for her day in September. But other than that….. Be Blessed!

I AM La’Crease (( I don’t have to do anything else))

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GOD Chose MEEEEEEEEEE…. CREEEEE?/BLOG

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Hello Family 🙂

Today I was laying in the bed thinking about how God works in my life. Its so unreal, makes me smile and LAUGH at the same time. When I was 19, I was so in LOVE with my daughter’s father. God told me that I LOVED that man, more than I LOVED him. I was devastated when God said that to me one day as I was washing dishes. Because for some reason, I felt it may have been true… not on purpose… but maybe a fact. I didn’t like that one bit, and I MADE SURE I DIDN’T LOVE ANY MAN like that EVER again. I know how to LOVE.. because I learned it from my parents and growing up with close siblings. So after God revealed that to me, I continued to show men LOVE… because its in me. While they thought I LOVED them so hard (((  but I was just loving how I was taught))).. they ALL were disappointed, sad, and in a state of disbelief when the relationship was over, and I walked away like a car tore up in a accident, with no scratches on my body. That’s one thing about me that I LOVE….. I can walk away and never look back… all while STILL LOVING you at the same time… but in a “out of your life” way.

I LOVE GOD MORE THAN ANYTHING… and just because I show you the LOVE and LOYALTY you may not have experienced from someone else outside of your family… doesn’t  mean LACREASE WALKER won’t walk away like I never knew you…. because I CAN….in a way that will make you ask yourself… “Did she even LOVE me in the first place?” And that answer is…Yes I did/do.

Okay, I got off track. I was so in LOVE with my daughter’s father, that it took me forever to get over him. That was one of the hardest things to do. Back then, there was no social media where you can read up on other stories and then come to the conclusion that this man is not the one for you. We didn’t have access to other women who was going through the same thing to connect with. We had to learn on our own. I was secretive, so a lot of things I went though alone. I didn’t know that SEX was the connection that kept me going back to him. When I cut off sex, I was able to move on. Took me years and years, and years to realize that. But here is the part that got me laughing and talking to God about. He is using MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE…. to talk to the broken women who are going through the same thing in this time and day. SO MANY women email me, talk to me in person, send text and other messages about the same thing. At first I was like… “Ok God, why are these ladies coming to me… I had a hard time back in the day trying to get over the LOVE I had for my daughter’s dad?” He said because you are over that, and you are the one who can reach these women. WOW WHAT AN HONOR…. When I think back on those times.. I don’t feel qualified AT ALL!! MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE??????? God are serious? Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee? CREE?????? I was so broken, hurt, ashamed, embarrassed, depressed, lost, had an abortion, MEAN AND EVIL… any and everything you can think of.. and GOD SENDS ME TO HELP THESE WOMEN?????????? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?

I must say… GOD KNOWS BEST…. because I have spoken with SO, SO, SO , SO, SO many women about relationships, hurt and things associated… that this is truly apart of my calling. I am helping these women to find themselves, and to get back to God. Women are a magnet to me when it comes to this area of their lives…. and I love it. I’ve been there. I know the pain. I know the hurt. I know the thoughts and the cries at night. I know it all. I just want to say THANK YOU LORD FOR CHOOSING ME! I WILL MAKE YOU PROUD AND SEND YOUR DAUGHTERS BACK TO YOU, SO THAT YOU CAN SEND THE MAN DESIGNED JUST FOR THEM!!!

I AM La’Crease ((( I don’t have to do anything else)))

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#FIFTY SHADES/ FIFTY SHADES OF GREY/ PART 2 OF MY STORY/BLOG

LET ME IN 50 SHADES

(Continued) #FIFTYSHADES

 I realized what he was doing…..he was interviewing. I thought to myself…. “I know dayum well he aint the one doing the interviewing.” Now… I’m staring at him. He’s so dayum fine …he catches my eye. I found it hard to turn away. I was nervous. I can’t be interviewed by him because I know me… I’ll be nervous. Oh my GOD.. I thought to myself.. this is not happening to me. Not today. Not this time in my life. I have no control, I felt weak, and once he saw this in my eyes he would take me mentally to a whole new height.

So… I sat there. I tried to convince  myself that he wasn’t the one to interview me, that maybe there were several interviewers. I had to have went over this in my head about 20 times. He kept looking at me, so I decided that I was leaving. Nope, I wasn’t about to be interviewed by this man. He was NOT going to intimidate me. Nope not today. Now…. I have this thing about me, if I catch the eye of someone attractive and for me…. its one of MY “ugly” days, then I will NEVER be intimidated no matter how good he looks or turn me on. Because in my mind, I’m thinking Ok Cree….he thinks you’re cute today, just wait till he sees you looking good. So, that kinda helps me.

But on this day………………… I was looking good!!! My face was MAC FLAWLESS… skin beautiful, eyes *wish a brotha would look me into these marbles and not get caught up – lol*, lips poppin, hair on point * no wigs or fake hair*, smile… SMILING, eye lashes batting… had on my all black outfit with my boots…. couldn’t tell me nothing before I left out of the house. As I sat there…. I made up my mind that I was leaving. Wasn’t going to put myself through this.. I’ve been down this STREET a time or two of being CHEMISTRY intimidated and not able to get out of it. I stood up, grabbed my purse… just then I remembered that I parked valet and didn’t have my keys. Dayum.. I said to myself and sat back down. I decided that I was going to stay. That I was going to get through this interview and have full control. I fought myself all while he was still interviewing. I know me…. I’ve been though this before. There aren’t many times a woman look into a mans eyes and become star gazed on first site. Its a feeling that paralyzes you. But I must admit its one of the sexiest minutes to be apart of. But dang…. why couldn’t this happen while at the grocery store, mall or restaurant somewhere…… NOT A INTERVIEW. SHAT!

He stands up and shakes the hand of the person he just interviewed and the person leaves. My heart is pounding as he’s walking towards me to get to the desk to ask “whose next”. We make eye contact and we speak at the same time. I knew he was coming for me. I was in trouble. He goes to the desk and the gurl points at me. “DAMMIT” I said in my mind… he IS the one going to interview me. I embraced myself as he walked towards me looking me DEAD in my eyes, trying to “download” my every thought in my head…..through my eyes. We smiled and its a wrap for me…. I already know. He walks toward me and says ” LaCrease Walker?”…. Yes, I said as I stood up to shake his hand. He walks in front of me and says lets go over to this table * the one he was at while doing the other interview*. I was so dayum nervous… I started to say… “YOU KNOW WHAT?” I’m good on this job, it was nice for you to call me. I’m outta here. But I didn’t.

He sat in the chair and I sat on the couch. There was also a table there, that he had all of my information on. I couldn’t turn my mind off of how FIONE he was as he looked at my resume. He looked good from afar, but up close OH MY GAWD!!!! I kept telling myself…GURL….. get it together. It was silence as he looked down. He knew what he was doing. He was loading up on me, when he came up from that paper and asked that first question… I knew he would take FULL CONTROL. As he asked me the first question… he sat back and had his way with me. Looking me so deep into my eyes, downloading everything about me. Reading me, taking mental notes. Just dogging MEEEEEEE.. LOL Just like in the movie during the interview scene. All I could do was try to stay focus. The chemistry was so deep..so alive. So in my face. Then he asked more questions. Still staring me in my eyes as I spoke…so sexy and so sensual. I felt my body reacting to his stares. I tried to redirect my thoughts, but he kept looking at me. I know my eyes started telling him what my thoughts were… I couldn’t even help it. LOL I was slipping away yall.

Whenever he spoke about the company… that was my time to regroup my thoughts and get myself together. I kept having to have these inside pep talks with myself, because I didn’t know how much of these intense stares I could take. Just as I got myself together, there goes another question. A time for me to talk while he download my thoughts. THEN…… in the middle of me answering a question… he stops me and says… “Take off your coat”. To myself… I’m like “OH HELL to the N word NAW… um um you wont be seeing this beautiful shapely booty, my thick thighs and my waist line that carries it all. NOT TODAY!!! LOL LOL LOL I told him that I was fine. He insist. But the way he said it.. it wasn’t in a sexual way… or out of order…. NOT AT ALL… LET ME BE CLEAR…to him….. it only made sense to “get comfortable”… since I appeared to be ” NERVOUS” and the interview just started. I didn’t  want to do it…. if I ever had a chance to get out of it…. IT WAS GONE NOW.

I stood up which the space between his chair and the couch I was sitting on… placed me right in front of him.. LIKE RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. I stood up and began taking off my coat… I tried to turn my head as I did it.. but our eyes locked and I PROMISE ON every TRUTH IN ME…. this man took off my coat for me!!!! His eyes told my coat to come off… AND IT OBEYED LOL LOL I had never in my life FELT SOMETHING SO INTENSE. When I took it off and sat it on the couch.. I felt like my breast, vagina, behind everything was EXPOSED! Its funny now looking back on it… but it wasn’t then. Shat…. I don’t even remember the interview after that. LOL

Whenever he spoke and shared things with me about the company, I reloaded trying to get “the POWER” back that he  was “stealing” from me. LOL  When it was my turn to answer the questions… my mind started failing me again.. worse every time. I starting thinking about kissing him, laying on the couch…all of this sexual stuff started coming to my mind. I’m saying to myself… “guuuuuuuuuurl if you don’t knock it off!!!  I couldn’t even help it… I was under a spell. The way he was looking at me.. he knew what he was doing. I was so weak and he knew it. He controlled the whole atmosphere and he was loving it. FINALLY …. the interview was over. YES!!!! He said.. I’m going to set you up on for a second interview. I was happy about that. He told me what time to come back in 2 days. I got to my car sat in it….. and almost needed a cigarette. I don’t smoke cigarettes, weed, anything… don’t even drink.. but I needed a hit of something that day. I was in a daze all the way home. I kept hitting my wrist asking myself…. what the HELL JUST HAPPENED? The experience was GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAT!!! But dang….. not at a INTERVIEW!

I thought about that man all day and all night. I couldn’t even sleep the meet was that INTENSE. I had a plan for him.I was going to “get that ass back”. When I go back… I was going to be in CONTROL. I was not going to let him take over my mind, sexually and mentally again. I didn’t sleep for 2 days thinking about it. I remembered what he said…. he kept saying how he loved my bubbly personality. This time… I was going to be about BUSINESS . I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE that about myself. I can give you BUBBLY.. SMILES.. LAUGHS… COMMUNICATION…SEXY, everything… but when I put on my BUSINESS FACE…….YOU WILL NOT be able to figure me out… because I’m in control of MEEEEEEEEE. I LOOOOOOOVE  that in myself.

The day and hour came for me to go back for a second interview… I walked up in there like  I WAS PART OWNER.. LOL LOL * Sho the FORK did*… Yalp had on my BUSINESS face like………..who WANTS TO SEE ME AND WHERE THEY AT? LOL LOL Guess who comes out to greet me.. looking BETTER THAN THE TWO DAYS BEFORE… GOOD GAWD…. um um ummmmm. One look into my eyes  as we shook hands to greet……and he said….. “you don’t seem as bubbly as you did before”… I LAUGHED MY ASS OFF IN MY MIND. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA YESSSS ITS WORKING…. He said you’re okay? I said yessss… I’m good!!!! 🙂  I’m saying in my mind as we lock eyes… “what you want me to sit around here naked in the second interview too”? NOT GONE HAPPEN BOO. LOL  LOL LOL I was so happy I had my POWER back. He was looking good though… but I was ready for him and his PARALYZING STARES. LOL He directs me to the same area we were in before. But this time I sat in the other chair that sits a table, the couch I was on and the chair he sat in. He leaves to get the person who wants to meet and interview me. They both come back, but only the guy who is doing the interviewing sits down and in the chair that *handsome* sat in last time. We got to talking about the job, then about his friends, dogs, homeless people, being sick.. kids, everything. We WERE KICKING IT.. I was so comfortable… I felt so good. He was so cool.

Then…………here HE comes…. didn’t he PARK his FIONE self on the couch between me and the interviewer… sat and stared at me THE WHOLE TIME. I’m saying to myself.. GOD MAKE HIM LEAVE!!!!! I cant take it. He watched my every move, heard every word I said.. analyzed me, captivated me, sexually intimidated me, took off my clothes without ONE touch, downloaded all my thoughts, made me apart of his atmosphere, and took all MY POWER away. I tried to ignore his presence… I tried to pretend he wasn’t there. I tried to believe this wasn’t happening to me. I tried to stop looking at him. He was loving it. He knew exactly what he was doing. I had no control. The guy who was doing the interview was so into his story and life.. he had no idea I “left the building”. LOL I was at Mr. “House”. LOL I couldn’t stop looking over at him. I was a mess. He got me. He got me good. After that… didn’t even matter. I was butt naked again.. in his presence. I just let myself go. What the hell I thought to myself… he won! My thoughts took over and my nipples got hard. My vagina walls started doing the Harlem shake, flips, cart wheels… and whatever thoughts came to mind….. my body REACTED. AT one point… I tried hard to get back FOCUSED…. but it was like little kids in my head with markers, crayons, pencils and ink pens… coloring and scribble scrabbling all over my thoughts. What ever conversation I tried to muster up.. I couldn’t because the kids in my head…. scribble scrabble on my thoughts. HE got me.. h Then came time for paper work. We had to get in the elevator ALONE together.. and oh boy…. NOT THE ELEVATOR…. so personal… so sensual. The chemistry…… can’t even explain. I will say… that I LOVED  the experience.. I LOVED how I felt… I LOVED the attraction and chemistry between us… but it was the wrong setting.

Please go see Fifty Shades of Grey… if you love my story… you’ll LOVE that movie… So sexy and inviting. 🙂 Listen to another of my FAVORITE SONGS from the SOUNDTRACK… Oh.. I love this song.

Be Blessed!

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Crees Ramblings/Relationships/RHOA

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Hey,

I guess in this entry I’ll do some rambling. Lets start with RHOA.

I’m still stuck on Apollo and last nights episode. How the hell could he do what he did without thinking about his family and then TURN THE STORY AROUND ON PHAEDRA and accuse her of not being there for him? Do you see that type of thinking?…  I don’t be bothered with men like that. When they start talking “side ways” I will too, then after I get tired of that. I’ll start acting “dumb”.. after that…. then I’m done with the friendship/relationship because its pretty much going down hill. And in this case it  did. He got mad and asked her for a divorce…. SHE GLADLY ACCEPTED!

A. while you were fresh out of jail Apollo.. she loved you and married you. B. You decided not to go with the “family business” to run a funeral home and go at it as husband and wife. C. You wanted your own money and decided that scheming was the way to go.  I’m stuck on how he  figure that he could just skip over all that…. and discuss Phaedra not going to his sentencing. I’ll tell him…  look….. before we get to the “icing” we gon talk about the making of the “cake”. You did wrong to start with, didn’t think about me, didn’t think about the kids, didn’t think about our family, you thought more about money, and impressing people who are still walking around here Scott free. No one wants to run back and forth to a jail house with 2 BOYS..while you jail house talk me into staying with you for your return home. Women aint doing that “no mo”. We look at that situation as YOU LEFT US.. You did things that were more important than me and your kids. Women look at that as you LOVED US.. but not enough to do right so that we could all be together. Sorry I don’t feel any sympathy… especially, especially, especially when he tried to turn it all on her. Only in passing of a conversation will he acknowledge his wrong, never coming to the conclusion that what HE did …. is what got them in that situation in the first place. #SEEYOUIN5

 I’m speaking from experience. I was dating this guy and we were trying to get it together. He was the sweetest man, loving, kind.. and he LOVED HIM SOME LACREASE. But he kept going back to jail. I was there for him, going to court with him, writing him everything.I LOVED THIS MAN. I don’t have one bad thing to say about him. He got out, did the same thing, and went back. When he came home… I was done with him. Told him to come over and pick up his things a few pair of socks and papers. He was sad, knew I meant business, we kept in touch but our relationship was over.

He went back to jail!!!

Came home and got it together. By this time I was long gone. We kept in touch from time to time. He had gotten married, was happy and doing well. Years had passed one day he contacted me, I invited him over and we caught up on old times. Time went by again, he came over this time he was in a different place. Told me that I WAS THE REASON why things went downhill for him. Told me I was a good woman, and that he loved me more than anyone he’s ever been with, and that if I hadn’t left him in his time of need ((jail)), then his life would have been different. He tried to make me believe that I was the reason why his life was the way it was, saying had I hung in there with him, we would be together. I wasn’t happy with  that conversation, because just like Apollo, HE made  the decision to do illegal things.You’re not going to put that on MEEEEE I’m sorry. He left my house.

Two weeks later he sat on the edge of his bed and shot and killed himself in the head. For years… I thought about his last words to me. So after watching last nights episode it bought back many memories. I hope Phaedra continues to stand strong. I hope she takes the boys to see him, I would hate for her to keep them from each other, but as far as herself…. she has to keep it moving in order to have peace of mind.

Be Blessed

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