Losing yourself in a MAN/BLOG

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Hey!

I was talking to one of my closes friends a few days ago about how she should make it her business to be around couples who are doing well for themselves  ((mainly husband and wives)) so that she can see how it LOOKS to be happy. She’s going through a WHOLE lot with her on and off again children’s father, and it kills me to see her this way. I believe with all my heart that she has lost herself in this man, and just don’t know how to get out. She’s a beautiful person, sweet as pie, but she allows herself to be mistreated and FINALLY she’s starting to see his true colors.

I know what its like to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t value you or what you bring into the relationship to take it to another level. Yes, I had my faults too, but in the end, I saw that he just wasn’t for me….. and that’s okay.

Coming to the conclusion that someone is not for you, is one of the hardest things for women. They know deep down in their hearts that the man they love is not for them, but they stay and HOPE things change. At some point, you gotta say this is it. That time comes when you start to feel that your self-esteem is low and not building, you cry easily, your feelings are  hurt, you find yourself wondering what he’s doing (( especially if he has a history of cheating)), you’re checking his FB page for new women or subliminal stats, going through his phone and texts. That’s not how you live life. That’s not how a good healthy  relationship should go.

If you haven’t seen your man in a few days, and  he see’s you, he starts going thorough your phone, watch out for him! Because if he feels you can and will do something sneaky within those days you both haven’t seen each other, then he needs to be VERIFIED as well.. Um cuse me! Again…… this is NOT how healthy relationships grow. Not good.

Look at Donald Trump. You see the way his wife pulled away from him as they exit the plane? Clearly a sign of manipulation going on in the relationship. She is not happy in that marriage. She probably feels that now he’s the President, he exercises even MORE Power, and feels there is no way out without retaliation from the public and especially from HIM.  Relationships and friendships should be happy. Yes, there will be problems, issues, misunderstandings and things of that nature. But to help in the loss of self-esteem, is not something ANYONE should experience.

In closing ask yourself.. DO I LOVE ME? What is it about me that allows him to treat me this way? What am I doing over and over again to allow this to continuously happen? If I leave him, what do I THINK he will do to me? Am I scared? Ask God to show you a pattern of his behavior. Tell yourself, that YES its going to be hard at first, then ask yourself can you eventually get over him? Tell and REMIND yourself that YOU WILL have to give up something (((( money, car, nice home, comfort, sex with HIM, security ))) for your PEACE. If you want to talk to me about your situation please feel free to email me DIRECTLY  longnosenikon@gmail.com  

I am LACREASE, and I dont have to do anything else!

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Sister Day, Husbands, and Laughs From the Desk of Cree

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I had a great time with my Sisters at Red Lobster yesterday evening. We get together every month for dinner to catch up with each other. Then afterwards we ALWAYS end up at their favorite bar… Kwick’s for Karaoke.

I rode with my Sister Peedie. But before we left, she made a stop at home to check in on her husband, and to change clothes . He came out to the truck to greet me, I noticed that he had this “puppy dog” look on his face, that would kill him to admit….. he wanted to go with us. LOL I know him so well… I love, love , love my brother -n- law because he treats my sister so well. PEEDIEDEE2 But my sister told me that when its time for our Sisters gathering, that’s our time. She said me and him are always out and about after work, going to dinner, movies, and shopping. She said this is my time to be with my Sisters. I got that. ……. I guess 🙂

All 9 of us met at 7pm and was seated. Just then my cousin Darcella came in with her husband Wood * who is really MY blood cousin*. (((DEEDAR))) We didn’t know that she was bringing him * wood* with her. But it was cool. In the middle of dinner, someone suggested that we go to Karaoke afterwards. We all agreed and trailed each other. When we got in the car my sister Peedie called her husband and told him to come down to the bar, because wood wanted a guy to be with him. One of our other sisters called her husband down and he came too. But when my sister Peedie’s husband found out that wood was at the dinner, he was kinda disappointed and felt that my sister didn’t want HIM to come. He noticed that Darcella and Wood are ALWAYS TOGETHER NO MATTER WHAT, and wonder why my sister didn’t feel that way. We told him that it was a Sister gathering, we didn’t even know Wood was coming. She tried to get him to come to the bar, but he went to bed… sad….. ahhhhh. Well we had a GOOD TIME!!! LOL

I love, love, love my VIRGO brother-n- law Mark,MARK AND BROTHER who my sister didn’t invite either. I love when he’s with us.. but end up spending it with his brother Deitrick* Haddon*

My point in all of this is… There was a time * in our teens and 20’s* when we (((Sisters))) would jump in our cars and hunt down our men and try to be with them. We all were PRIVATE INVESTIGATORS… tracking down all their whereabouts, friends, family members and phone numbers. We wanted to be with them even if they went to the store. We wanted to know when, where and why. We questioned who they were with, who was there, why they wanted to be there so bad, when were they coming home, and who did you meet while there.

Times has really changed. LOL LOL * I’m laughing so hard*. I WISH THE HELL I WOULD………. look for my husband or boo. I just don’t have that kinda time. I cant believe how much time and work I use to put into finding out what he was doing. LOL Realizing now, that was taking time from ME….. DOING ME… LOL. Every time the Sisters get together, their husbands want to come so bad… and since I don’t have one, I’m the one feeling bad for them and convince the Sisters to let them come with us. They have the best husbands… DRAMA FREE. But I’m learning to understand Sister time is Sister time, and Husband time is Husband time. I get it…. they just look so pitiful. LOL LOL

Thing is they know their wives are not doing anything wrong… they just feel that they should be able to come along and have guy talk at the other end of the table. But what the men don’t understand is……its not about them separating themselves at the end of the table…. the Sisters want to have Sisters Day without them being present PERIOD. LOL

Boy have times changed. LOL LOL * cracking up laughing*

 

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Crossing the line in Marriage~ From the desk of Cree

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So, I’m sitting here watching the Real Housewives of Atlanta. Clearly reminding me of Why did I get married…… as Kenya is the one with NO HUSBAND, NO CHILDREN.. NO NOTHING… but trouble.
 
 
I’m having a hard time understanding why these other women can’t see the drama she’s bringing to the cast. Maybe its in their contract to have to sit there and be apart of something that only makes them look like weak women. Oh well… couldn’t be ME!
 
 
I’ve never been married. But I be darn, if I see my husband talking to someone who I clearly warned … that if you have any issues or conversations for ME or my HUSBAND… I need to always be present and apart of it. Now keep in mind this is not a random… this is because of an incident that happened in the past. My Question: Why is that so hard to understand? This is why when you’re speaking, you need to be CLEAR of what you’re saying ESPECIALLY when dealing with WOMEN…. it doesn’t need to be a 15 minute conversation…. only 3-5. To me either Apollo is either slow, or have a hard time understanding “lines you don’t cross” in a marriage.
 
 
After the relationship with my daughters father… I promised I would NEVER be insecure with my man.And I stayed true to my word. I realized I LOOK GOOD TOO. And, I sure don’t want a MAN who’s insecure either. If I ever had to be…. I would leave… one thing about LACREASE WALKER…. I have no problems leaving a friendship or relationship once I see its not working. NONE.. A BLESSING I TRULY HAVE. #GIFTOFGOODBYE. Let me say this…. I will work on my marriage, talk, cry, go to counseling, meet up with other married couples for advice…. but I refuse for my SELF ESTEEM to go down. Hell to the neva naw! 
 
 
Some women are so full of drama.. I wish a woman/man WOULD disrespect our relationship/marriage. The part that made me mad about is Pheadra, she’s so “sophisticated ” but maybe she didn’t want to really get down with him, because she was filming, but she should have made him come to the room with her to talk that out. I wouldn’t be able to sleep, or discuss anything else until we talked. I’m not going to beat around the bush, we’re not going to talk in front of company, we’re not going to use curse words to get our point across, we’re not going to raise our voices, and before we go to sleep…. we should have made up. All that next day, talking in codes, making him kiss her as*… I wouldn’t play all that. She’s keeping it build up inside and its causing resentment.. I can see it on her face. That will make a man step out too. Nope.. it aint right… but it happens.
 
 
Single women… like Kenya always have THE MOST TO SAY about people who are married. She doesn’t have a clue to mother hood or being a wife. Its so disrespectful to see her so deep into their business. I, do NOT play that at all. I wish a woman WOULD get in me and my husbands business.
 
 
First of all, the type of woman I am, I WILL NEVER make you feel as if you can comment on my relationship. And let me make this clear…. I say I don’t play that not because IM JUST SO GONE AND HEAD OVER HEELS OVER HIM… but its because that’s crossing the line. And when someone cross the line on MY BUSINESS with MY HUSBAND…. a beep goes off in my head.. meaning you’re IN MY LANE..I’ll give you that look, and you’ll have so many seconds to vacate the premises. From there… JUST HAVE GOD ON SPEED DIAL…. cause that’s what its going to take to get me to calm down.
 
 
Now let me say this….. both of my Sisters are married. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE , LOVE their husbands. They’re the best brother n laws any sister could have. The type of RELATIONSHIP me and my Sisters have…is this…… I don’t get in their business. My sisters don’t call me, text me, inbox me, or tell me the problems they’re having. FIRST OF ALL … I DON’T CARE… IT’S NOT MY BUSINESS. AND ITS NOT MY LANE. I love that, because when we’re all together, I feel good and comfortable around them. So, when they ask for my opinion about something in the relationship.. THEY ALWAYS VALUE IT. ALWAYS.. ALWAYS! They know I love them all, I don’t take sides JUST BECAUSE THEY’RE MY SISTERS. I tell them to truth, I use words to get to the point, and its not a 2 hour conversation. The truth is always to the point. This is why an authentic woman like me will always stand out.
 
 
So, I say all of that to say…..learn to stay in your lane when it comes to a Marriage. If God Blesses me with a Husband…..God, Communication, along with understanding, faithfulness, and keeping people out of our BUSINESS will be our guide….. THIS IS ONE AREA IN MY LIFE… I DO NOT PLAY!
 
Be Blessed!
 
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy