Thank you Lord for waking me up this morning. Thank you for all the lessons that youve shown me in the last few days. Thank you for blessing me. This post may be all over the place, because my mind is flowing like that right now. So keep up with me, if you can\’t…………. sorry. By the end of this blog hopefully you can take something with you and store it in your head for future use.
Back to work…..ugh. Same ole faces same ole thang. Why do we concern ourselves with issues that don\’t even concern us? I watched a coworker do that today, and I said to myself there is motivation behind what she\’s doing. But what? I say that because I have done the same thing a time or 2, so now I can ask myself why I am I doing this? I\’m home from Atlanta seeing myself in a different light, and still I ask myself…….what is it that I\’m suppose to be doing in life? I love working with teens and being a *second mom* to them. but there is something more. A friend of mine has a job waiting for me and still I\’m asking myself……..Lacrease is this something you really want to do? So I asked myself, what do you see yourself doing? Well, I like to plan and organize things. I love making phone calls to people, communicating, collecting information, research, writing, and things like that. Then I get this thought of managing a hotel working with people to * make things happen*. I want to work in a professional atmosphere with everyone on the same page. I desire to give tip top customer service. This has always meant a lot to me. I love kids and I will always mentor to them, and be there for them, but for some reason I can\’t see myself in that position of work right now. I have been feeling this way for a while now.
Ive been to Atlanta many times. About 17 years ago, I was there for a family reunion and fell in love. I was so geeked and so pumped about it, I went home told 2 of my closes friends, and within 2 months, me my cousin and my 2 friends were driving 13 hours to Atlanta to look for a job and a house to stay in. Me and my cousin got into a big argument, she stayed and I was ready to go. Of course we started back talking again, but she found an apartment and a job within that same week. She\’s still there to this day LIVING IT UP!!! Oh how I wish I had stayed. I wish I wasn\’t so touchy back then and stayed on track, I would be there as we speak. Neisha will be going to Law School next year and I am so thinking about going back to find me a place. I am tired of Detroit and all its problems. Not saying, that Atlanta is not that way. OH NO… I AM NOT THAT FOOLISH to think that. I told myself when I left, that if I got that same feeling I did 17 years ago, that I would consider it again, but this time the person I am will get the ball rolling. And I did get that feeling. I can see myself living there alone for some reason, but its okay. I see it so clearly. I feel it. I\’m going to be really thinking and doing my own research, and if things work out…..2010 its on!!!
When we were in ATL, of course Tyler\’s name came up plenty and many of times. I had to check myself one night when something happened * wont post on here for the life of me* and it really pissed me off. I mean it had me really thinking about somethings. I couldn\’t even sleep well when we went to bed. I stayed awake really thinking about some things they said to me. So, I said when I get home I\’m going to post on my yahoo page just what\’s on my mind about Tyler Perry.
First of all, yes I truly love and admire Tyler Perry very very much. I love the messages in his work, I love his motivation. I love many things about him. Yes, I do want to meet him someday. But let me make this clear. I\’m almost 41 years old, when I meet Tyler Perry, trust me I wont be running to him screaming and hollering, jumping on his back, nor will I run and jump on his hips kissing him, and scaring the poe man. That\’s not Lacrease. I\’m realizing that I must be very careful who I share my love and admiration for him with, because people don\’t know me, and they seem to take things the wrong way. So, I had to ask myself……Lacrease do you talk about him a little too much? What are you saying to make people think that you are * just one crazy sister for TP?* Only 2 people understand my love and admiration for Tyler and that\’s my Sister Pearl PT and Neisha. I never ever talk about marrying him, or being with him,having children or any of that crazy stuff, that\’s not even my connection I have with Tyler. People just really know how to run off with just a little bit. I\’m a supportive person when it comes to a project, idea,person or anything positive. Why do people have to associate anything else with that? It pisses me off to no end. So that\’s when I had to ask myself…. what am I putting out there to get those response? How do I present my admiration for Tyler to others? What a reality check I got in Atlanta.
We went to see the homes of a few celebrities and important people in Atlanta. Those stars have their gates and security people in place so tight, that if Jesus knocked on the door, he wouldn\’t be able to get in . I didn\’t know if I should shake my head in disbelief or say to myself, the only way to understand * this show* is to be *one of them*. I kept my mouth closed and kept it moving. I know its some crazy people out there, and I know and understand that everyone is not like Lacrease. l But its a shame when your house is so locked up and so way back in the boom docks and it has all kinds of notes and signs everywhere saying * No trespassing* but as soon as a concert, TV show, movie, game, CD, DVD comes out, they * trespass* on your commercials, Internet advertisements,talk shows, magazine pages, radio, TV. For the life of me, that\’s MATH I JUST DON\’T GET!!!! All I want to do is see your beautiful home from the outside, not sit up on your couch and eat your steaks.
Yea, there are some things, Cree just don\’t understand. And this is surely one of them.
I realized that in this life I care about people toooooo much. don\’t get me wrong, I love everybody, and yes I\’m suppose too. But I get wrapped up on wanting people *to get* things. Its one thing to go through something and you get over that thing and minister to others, but some people just want to experience that same thing for themselves. I use to be mad at people like that, but you know what? I can\’t worry about that. I just have to sit back and watch it go down. No matter how bad it kills me. I just don\’t have nothing to say about anything.
I\’m gone.
Cree
Inside the mind of cree 
