Sunday night 11-14-21 I had plans to watch Adele One night Only.
I was sleepy when it came on and only got a chance to see her perform 2 songs before I turned it off. I absolutely love her singing. She’s beautiful and she’s interesting. She’s a person who LOOKS like she has a story to tell. And SHE DID!
I love going to concerts, music is everything to me. I LOVE LIVE performances, but when it comes to watching a concert on TV, it just doesn’t give me what I need. So, my plan was to watch the show, but fast forward to the songs I knew.
The next night, I turned it on and watched it from the beginning. I really enjoyed the open conversation she had with Oprah, it gave me a glimpse of who she is, and I loved it. She opened with Hello, which gave me a chance to check out the atmosphere of the concert. It was BEAUTIFUL. When she sung “Easy on Me” a new song that I have never heard of…. It made me cry. The lyrics. I remember asking myself, where is this coming from? I had only planned to find my favorite songs. But the going down of the sun and how the drone circled around, set the atmosphere for me and I was all in.
When she got to “I Drink Wine, I was gone. I was crying so hard, like I was at a funeral of someone close. I couldn’t figure out why and what was happening to me. I was home alone, and embarrassing myself with my crying. These were those hard cries, where people bring you lots and lots and lots of tissue, and rub your back. It was that.
So, my daughter calls and ask what I was doing. I told her that I was watching the Adele concert, and I’m crying all through her performances. Then she asked, have you made it to the proposal part? I asked her what proposal? I can tell she wanted to ask, why are you crying then if you haven’t made it to that part. LOL I never knew about it. When it did come on, I was crying even worst. But what took me over the edge, when she sung a new song off her CD 30, Hold On, then Love is a Game. I CRIED through the whole performance. Never in a million years did I expect to do that. YES, IT WAS THAT GOOD!!!! YESSS! YES! YES!
After the show was over, I sat there and asked myself, What was that all about? I went deep into my mind to see if there was someone in my life that these lyrics are relating too? What’s causing me to cry like this? Yes, its the lyrics, but who is this person. I figured it out. My daughters dad.
We are very close to this day. I love him, and he loves me. We do NOT have a desire to get together at all. We don’t even talk on that level, we have both moved on. I was 18 when we met and he was 17. At that age, you don’t know anything about love. Her lyrics took me back to the days after our relationship was over, that I couldn’t express at the time how I felt because of all of the anger. Never knew they needed to resurface. She bought them to me. Peacefully. Respectfully. Beautifully. Lovingly.
Thank you Adele for a beautiful night. One Night Only.
Growing up, my 3 siblings and I weren’t allowed to fight. We had to argue it out, then make up right there on the spot with hugs and kisses, and we hated it.
Tisha, didn’t grow up with any sisters, and now I understand why she doesn’t get how it works with siblings. She expects for Kimmi to be her Sister, the one she never had, but she has to first know how to be one. With Sisters, you have to make up when there is a disagreement, not sit with others and allow them to talk about her. Not be afraid to call and say, I’m sorry. Tisha went right to monsters mom and made her feel it was Okay to mention Kimmi, knowing they didn’t get alone. No, noone should be able to talk about your sister to you. Tisha needs to understand also with Sisterhood, that when you fall out, you call each other, talk about it and make up. Kimmi said, “I don’t know what to say to you.”
Its also so sad that Tisha’s mom doesn’t like Kimmi, and she says Kimmi doesn’t know how to be a friend. What woman wants to be “sisters” with someone who mother doesn’t like them? Girl charge that friendship, sisterhood to the game. You have to know how to be a sister, before you can request one.
Martell Holt. As Melody call him (( cracking up))), did not want Melody to touch him in therapy. I think because it would have made him cry in front of the camera. You know how you are crying about something, and someone comes and says ” don’t cry”, and it makes you cry even harder? That’s what that was all about. LOL Its Okay Martell, you better hop on board with Melody and building property so that you can start to get some of that money back. One thing that I see for sure is that Melody wants to be cool with him, only if he can stop the blame game and pick up the kids on his week. I believe that they could still did business together to complement each other and their family. I didn’t agree with the kids singing that song at the listening party, but Melody said that she didn’t know they were being filmed.
Destiny. It’s something about her, cant place my finger on it. Seems like she wanted her marriage to be private, she didn’t trust Melody at all, as we can see. she probably hated the new season was going to start without her husband. But gurl its Okay, this is life and its apart of what we have to go through. Just don’t lay on the floor and die, keep it moving, build your business like you’ve been doing.
Marsau. I see right through that FIONE, sarcastic, way with words, man. Whatever he’s been doing that’s shady, it can hit his household, and he can still come out the fire without a burn.LOL He can get away with anything. Its all in the way he mold his wife. I love these two together tho, she loves him, and he loves her, but its something shady going on with him, and one thing I do know. Keep this show on the air, and pay attention. LOL
Tiffany. This new gurl…. NOT FEELING HER. One thing about sitting in the presence of other women and you’re the NEW PERSON. You are suppose to sit down, LISTEN, shut up, and then find out where you fit in. You don’t go running your mouth , saying who you met, and what somebody else was doing. You sit there, you observe, you find out which of the gurls personality fits yours, next time maybe sit next to them. But you do NOT come to the table running your mouth talking. That’s a NO-NO. You’ll have to pry my mouth open to ANY table, function, gathering, or anything I’m sitting at and don’t know anyone but the person who invited me. Even if I know of a person, you just sit there and listen. I don’t care what I heard about any of them. I HATE GOSSIP AND DRAMA, this gurl is not going to last long. I cant wait to see this weekend episode.
Tisha told Kimmi how she felt about their friendship and that she never had a sister so she considered Kimmi as the sister she never had. What I don’t think Tisha is understanding is that first of all, her mother played a huge part in them NOT moving forward as “Sisters.” She talks to much. Tisha allows her mother to have an opinion about her husband, friends and her. That’s not Okay. Tisha’s mother feels that Kimmi is not a good friend to her. I see things differently. Anytime your mother can say anything to anyone, and you and have the ” well she’s my mother” attitude why would Kimmi want to continue that friendship? Not only that, her mother is a mess starter. Just because I’m your friend doesn’t make me ride or die in your wrong. Don’t get mad at me because I tell you that I’m not feeling your behavior on something that happened. No, I will not check you on the spot in front of people, but I am going to say something in private. Friends tell each other when they’re wrong.
Kimmie was saying in the last episode that they have spoiled her, and never told her when she was wrong. So now that everyone is speaking up about it, Tisha have a problem with it. Who wants to be friends with someone who you cant pull to the side and say.. Sis you’re wrong? Don’t get me wrong I like Tisha, but at some point, since you DIDNT have any Sisters, you have to learn the role of one.
Destiny is DIVORCE! I knew it was something going on with her husband. She wanted to go in on Martell when he said, “see, that’s why yall ass getting a dayum divorce right now because of yall mouth” talking about her and Melody. LOL Is something wrong with him? He thinks a woman is suppose to shut up with no opinion after he’s been out in the streets all types of days and nights. Boy, if you don’t have several seats in a empty stadium where you can think.
Marsau cracks me up. I just love the way he thinks sometimes. He talks a lot of smack, he’s the type of man where you have to catch him doing something, with a camera in your hand, and 5 witnesses. LOL He’s going to get out of everything you came to him with. LOL
Mel! I’m so happy she’s at a place where she can get to know herself after her Divorce from Martell. I don’t think she should do anymore songs about her marriage, just let it go. She should focus on her kids, career and herself. Don’t even date. She got married at a young age, and have so much to learn about herself.
Today on my candle journal I’m looking for more tins. I found some really nice ones in gold, black, white, and in wine. So then the testing of the wicks will come. Right now I have a tin on the warmer in the scent of banana pudding, and it smells so good. It really smells like my mom is making banana pudding in my apartment.
Growing up my mom had lots of perfumes, candles and incense burning in the house and that’s where my love came in. I started loving candles, lighting incense and plug-ins. But never in a million years would I believe I would be making candles, and room sprays. What I like most about it is, how different scents make me feel. I love the process of making candles and when I’m done I enjoy watching them cure into a solid. It’s amazing the aroma in my apartment. They say making candles is a science, it is surely the truth.
I made my first candle in August 2020 and when my daughter brought it to my attention how much I love candles, she said mom you should go on YouTube and watch how they’re made. She said It’s really easy, and I believe you will love it especially working with fragrances. So, she bought me a candle kit and I remember being so nervous. For some reason I felt I would mess it up. I took my time but I was shaking so bad……..but I did it.
I didn’t realize that candle making really takes time and lots of research, trial and error. I thought you just melt the wax, put in a wick and light it up. That is so not how it goes. 🤣 First off, there are several waxes to choose from. I started with soy, and plan to learn a few others. Soy is the easiest they say. Then there is testing of the wicks which is a doozy in itself. Then you have to make sure it’s centered properly, because if not, it can leave lots of soot, and start to burn the glass from being over to one side long enough.
Soy Candles has to cure at least 2 weeks for a great HT (( hot throw)) and that was a pain to make a candle and have to wait to test the fragrance. Over all, it took me over $1000, and 5 months before launch day. It was all worth it because now different ideas are popping in my head, and I can’t wait to fulfill them.
I’m so excited. I launched my Candle line on 1/15/21 and I was so nervous. I did really good and I’m super proud of myself. My daughter has been in business for almost a year, and already she has bought her a home. Yessss! She is teaching me so much about the business, and it excites me to grow even more. While there’s a lot to learn, I’m ready!
At the Luxybar we make yoni soap, body scrubs and soaps, soap for sensitive skin, shower gel, and bath bombs.
If you would like to purchase any of our luxurious candles and spa items here is the link.
I’m NEVER looking back!/BLOG Entry
It was March when I found out about COVID-19. I knew it was real. Many people thought it was a HOAX, or something to take our minds off one thing or another, but for me, I knew it was real. Never in a million years did I expect for some many people to die. I know whole families who caught this virus, and survived. I had a few school friends to die, and it was devastating. Everyday I wake up and I think about it. Constantly checking to see if I can smell and taste. Wondering, if I sanitized my hands after every interaction with people. When I cough, I wonder … do I have it? I think we’ve all experienced this at one time or another. Its really scary. Its one thing to become sick from it, but its another to die. I found myself praying everyday seem like all day for people and myself. I’ll never stop praying.
When COVID hit in March, I immediately took a leave. I was about tired of Walmart anyway. I left in 2012 after doing 9 years. In 2014, I went back after being laid off from working at a High School. Things had changed a lot in those 2 years. They were now open 24 hours, I was working the midnight shift 10-7 and it was only self check out. I hated being the new gurl at a different store. Nobody liked to work self check out because it was a job that you couldn’t leave and walk around, like you could at the registers. You could cut your light off, and basically do what you want until someone notice you missing. I always stayed at my station, and I believe that was the reason why they trained me there.
Once I realized that the other cashiers didn’t want to work at self check out, I began to see why. You have to run 8 registers at one time ALONE! It was 20 items or less *** people never listened***, they stole, got mad because they had to ring up themselves, I did do age approvals and sometimes when I was with another customer it would take sometime to get back to them. They needed price checks on items that didn’t have a tag, and so many other issues. I couldn’t get anyone to help me because they hated self check out. After being put there night, after night, after night, I came to realize, it was my final destination. I knew I wasn’t going to be working in any other department in the store. I was the new girl.
I SIGNED up to work 3 nights a week, and every time I came in, they told me to go to self checkout. My nights were Monday, Friday and Saturday. THE BUSIEST EVER! After so many weeks, I got tired of calling management to help me, or show me how to do something. Sometimes they never came, and when they did, they hurried up and got out of my area. They hated it too. When 5 o’clock am rolled around and the store was quiet, it was my chance to learn how to work everything self checkout. I would sign into the system and learn how to work each function. I taught myself how to perform every works. I learned how to master it. I learned how to trouble shoot the machines, and I learned how to reboot . After several months I didn’t have to call anyone to help me, managers knew that I was enjoying my job with people. (( I love people)) but they also saw that I was confident in my job and knew what I was doing. You could walk up to me and ask my anything about self check out and I could tell you.
My coworkers would come up to me and ask….. why do you like working this area? I told them once I learned everything in the system, it became easy for me. They hated it because the area was small and it had to be a AREA of order or it would drive you crazy. That worked for me, and so it was enjoyable.
One day 2 of the ASM came up to me and said, every night you work Cree, we want you over here. I was shocked. I said Okay. They said you know how to run this area and get the lines down, its always order over here, for now on, we want you to run this area the days you work. Every year managers switch off shifts. So when the next year came and we had 2 more managers, they came to me and told me the same thing, Cree, we want you to always work self check out because you know this area better than anyone. I was really excited to hear this from all of the mangers because I always felt that since I started I was made to be in that area because I was the new gurl and no one wanted to work it.
2019. As we got new cashiers, they heard about how the managers (( all of them)) spoke highly of me working self check out. So, the 4 days I wasn’t there, they would work it as well. After a few months had passed, again, no one wanted to work there because its fast pace, people got on your nerves, and it was very up close and personal. But I kept hearing that other cashiers were asking members of management ” Why does Cree get to work self check out all the time?” I was shocked because I found out it was the few people that were cool to me, and that WAS THERE BEFORE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!. All I kept thinking was, you were here before me, you didn’t want to come down here to work it, now your going to the manager asking why am I, in self check out every day. At first it didn’t bother me. But after a while it did. People told me that I always made my job look easy, when in fact it was irritating at times. But I didn’t know they were going to the manger about it.
Pure jealousy. I was glad I worked that area alone with no other co-workers. I didn’t know who to trust, so I said very little and LOVED IT. I had 4 days off where they had a chance to work the fast pace self check out and still they wanted to know why I WAS THERE. I remember one of the managers (( not the ones mentioned above)) , came to me and said.. Well Cree, several cashiers had been coming to me asking, why does Cree get to work self check out all the time., and I told them that we would began to rotate. She knew I was feeling some kinda way, but she said she wanted to be fair. It became the talk of the midnight shift, how I always worked self check out.
As a customer, you all know self checkout can be something different. When I got there nobody wanted to work it, because it confined them to that area. There were times when I first started when I wanted to grab my keys and coat and quit because I was the only running it, and nobody trained me. They didn’t listen to me when I asked.. “Why am I the only one running this area all the time?” They said I made it look easy, and that I got the lines down faster than anyone else. I put lots of time in training myself for that area, and now THIS manager who I couldn’t stand when I was working the first store for 9 years, was telling me we had to rotate. Well, that never happened not once. It wasn’t because I said anything to change her mind, but because she knew it was all talk, and that others were jealous and really didn’t want to run it. She was the main manager giving me good evaluations. And then she was LET GO, months later. **blank stare**
Fast forward to 2020. I was about tired of Walmart. That running to the manager asking her why is Cree always at self check out bothered me. I dont like jealousy at all. The main person running to the manager, was there before me. I no longer wanted to work there. I knew then, that God was telling me, my time was almost up for GOOD, and there would be no going back. I kept asking God what am I good at? What is my talent? What can I do to make money and ENJOY doing it? Whats my craft? I want to work for myself. God please reveal to me MY money maker, but most importantly remove me from here!