I’m NEVER looking back! /BLOG Entry

It was March when I found out about COVID-19. I knew it was real. Many people thought it was a HOAX, or something to take our minds off one thing or another, but for me, I knew it was real. Never in a million years did I expect for so many people to die. I know whole families who caught this virus and survived. I had a few school friends to die, and it was devastating. Every day I woke up and I thought about it. Constantly checking to see if I can smell and taste. Wondering, if I sanitized my hands after every interaction with people. When I coughed, I wondered … if I had it? I think we’ve all experienced this at one time or another. It’s really scary. It’s one thing to become sick from it, but it’s another, to die. I found myself praying every day, seem like all day for others and myself. I’ll never stop praying.

In March, I immediately took a leave. I was about tired of Walmart anyway. I left in 2012 after doing 9 years, I started Oct 2003. I loved it there. Great coworkers to this day. In 2014, I went back after being laid off from working at a High School. This time I was at a new store. Things had changed a lot in those 2 years. Walmart was now open 24 hours. I was working the midnight shift 10-7 and it was only self-checkout open after a certain time of night. Later on in the years it was open 24 hours, and the registers were closed down around 12 am.

I hated being the new gurl at a new store. I made sure they knew I was new to THAT store. I knew how to run the register because at the last store, I was a full-time cashier. We didn’t have self-checkout. They were making way to put them in when I left in 2012. Now being at this new store, I quickly learned that until the managers got to know your personality, you had to do all the things the other cashiers hated to do, I was no different. I found out that NOBODY liked to work self-check-out, because it was a job that you couldn’t leave and walk away from, like you could at the registers. There, you could cut your light off, and basically go missing. I always stayed at my station, and I believe that was the reason why they chose me to learn and work self-check-out.

After about 2 weeks of me working, management were told by Corporate that they had to start opening up self-checkout at 12 am and to only open a register when customers had large baskets. AS THE NEW GURL guess who was chosen to work self-checkout? Me! After listening to all the cashiers complain about hating it there, I had to see why for myself.

You have to run 8 registers at one time ALONE! It was 20 items, or less *people never listened*, they stole, argued with me, hated me, cursed me out, changed prices, put other prices on their items, they stayed mad at me. Some people walked into the store and got mad at me because they had to ring up themselves. I did do age approvals and sometimes when I was with another customer it would take some time to get back to them. They needed price checks on items that didn’t have a tag, and so many other issues. I couldn’t get anyone to help me because they hated self-checkout. After being put there night, after night, after night, I came to realize, it was my final destination. I knew I wasn’t going to be working in any other department in the store. I was the new girl.

I SIGNED up to work 3 nights a week, and every time I came in, they told me to go to self checkout. My nights were Monday, Friday and Saturday. THE BUSIEST EVER! After so many weeks, I got tired of calling management to help me, or show me how to do something. Sometimes they never came, and when they did, they hurried up and got out of my area. They hated it too. When 5 o’clock am rolled around and the store was quiet, it was my chance to learn how to work everything self checkout. I would sign into the system and learn how to work each function. I taught myself how to perform every works. I learned how to master it. I learned how to trouble shoot the machines, and I learned how to reboot . After several months I didn’t have to call anyone to help me, managers knew that I was enjoying my job with people. (( I love people)) but they also saw that I was confident in my job and knew what I was doing. You could walk up to me and ask my anything about self check out and I could tell you.

My coworkers would come up to me and ask….. why do you like working this area? I told them once I learned everything in the system, it became easy for me. They hated it because the area was small and it had to be a AREA of order or it would drive you crazy. That worked for me, and so it was enjoyable.

One day 2 of the ASM came up to me and said, every night you work Cree, we want you over here. I was shocked. I said Okay. They said you know how to run this area and get the lines down, its always order over here, for now on, we want you to run this area the days you work. Every year managers switch off shifts. So when the next year came and we had 2 more managers, they came to me and told me the same thing, Cree, we want you to always work self check out because you know this area better than anyone. I was really excited to hear this from all of the mangers because I always felt that since I started I was made to be in that area because I was the new gurl and no one wanted to work it.

2019. As we got new cashiers, they heard about how the managers (( all of them)) spoke highly of me working self check out. So, the 4 days I wasn’t there, they would work it as well. After a few months had passed, again, no one wanted to work there because its fast pace, people got on your nerves, and it was very up close and personal. But I kept hearing that other cashiers were asking members of management ” Why does Cree get to work self check out all the time?” I was shocked because I found out it was the few people that were cool to me, and that WAS THERE BEFORE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!. All I kept thinking was, you were here before me, you didn’t want to come down here to work it, now your going to the manager asking why am I, in self check out every day. At first it didn’t bother me. But after a while it did. People told me that I always made my job look easy, when in fact it was irritating at times. But I didn’t know they were going to the manger about it.

Pure jealousy. I was glad I worked that area alone with no other co-workers. I didn’t know who to trust, so I said very little and LOVED IT. I had 4 days off where they had a chance to work the fast pace self check out and still they wanted to know why I WAS THERE. I remember one of the managers (( not the ones mentioned above)) , came to me and said.. Well Cree, several cashiers had been coming to me asking, why does Cree get to work self check out all the time., and I told them that we would began to rotate. She knew I was feeling some kinda way, but she said she wanted to be fair. It became the talk of the midnight shift, how I always worked self check out.

As a customer, you all know self checkout can be something different. When I got there nobody wanted to work it, because it confined them to that area. There were times when I first started when I wanted to grab my keys and coat and quit because I was the only running it, and nobody trained me. They didn’t listen to me when I asked.. “Why am I the only one running this area all the time?” They said I made it look easy, and that I got the lines down faster than anyone else. I put lots of time in training myself for that area, and now THIS manager who I couldn’t stand when I was working the first store for 9 years, was telling me we had to rotate. Well, that never happened not once. It wasn’t because I said anything to change her mind, but because she knew it was all talk, and that others were jealous and really didn’t want to run it. She was the main manager giving me good evaluations. And then she was LET GO, months later. **blank stare**

Fast forward to 2020. I was about tired of Walmart. That running to the manager asking her why is Cree always at self check out bothered me. I dont like jealousy at all. The main person running to the manager, was there before me. I no longer wanted to work there. I knew then, that God was telling me, my time was almost up for GOOD, and there would be no going back. I kept asking God what am I good at? What is my talent? What can I do to make money and ENJOY doing it? Whats my craft? I want to work for myself. God please reveal to me MY money maker, but most importantly remove me from here!

After almost 15 years total… I’m done.

March 2020. I NEVER looked back.

My next Chapter soon.