In this entry…. I guess I’ll blog off the top of my head.
Its been below zero here in Detroit at night, and reaching only 0 in the day time. We had so much snow to fall in the last few days that we were snowed in my parking lot. I did go out one day to start my van and to get it warmed up. I skipped a day, but went out this morning. I really couldn’t sleep this morning, had dreams about being stuck in the snow and not being able to take care of my business. After getting unstuck in my dream, it woke me completely up. I went in the bathroom to brush my teeth and to get myself ready to go outside to start my van.
After leaving the bathroom…. I decided to log into Facebook to see what was going on, and to check my off the hook inbox messages. As I refreshed the page, I read a post from my hair stylist Janine. She said she lost her daughter Janae. OMG I just jumped up and ran in to the bathroom. I couldn’t think at all. I got an instant headache, and I didn’t even finish the rest. I’m so shocked at this news, and horrified at the same time. I totally disconnected myself with the news for being in shock, and started putting on my double layer clothes to go outside to tackle this cold, and my van. After that I went back to read the rest of her post, and I just cried. And cried and cried….and cried, and cried and cried. I’m just completely devastated over this news.
Her mom has been doing my hair for almost 23 years…. Janae was only 24. Growing up I remember her being a sickly child, just recently she moved to Atlanta to attend College at one of the Universities and was doing well. During the end of last year she was rushed to the hospital for a bad headache. Her mom went to be with her, and shortly she was able to go home. She was on her FB saying she was having a good day, then she had not so great days. I just loved this little gurl. She smiled all day everyday. She was the sweetest gurl you could EVER EVER BE BLESSED with. I knew she had health issues all her life, but I never expected this. I’m going to miss her on my FB page. I can’t imagine what her mom * Janine* is going through. She loved her daughter… her only one. Father God in the name of Jesus… comfort her. *Tears*
Then I went outside to start my van, took about 20 tries for it to come on. And when it did MY HEAT WAS OUT. I had the best heat and air in the world… all I need is for it to be on 1 and it was either blazing or cold. I couldn’t get out of my parking spot the snow was so high. I had to go back in the building to get shovel. When a neighbor saw me shoveling, he got right on his phone and called one of his friends in the building to DO IT FOR ME. Wow , I see him all the time, but don’t know his name. No matter what I do or where I go. God ALWAYS send people to help me. He came out in 5 minutes and shoveled me out of my spot. I was so happy. I hot tailed out of there, and went to the grocery store. Now, I have to find money I don’t even have to get this fixed. I just sat in the van and cried a little. Seem like I can’t take any more. I feel sometimes as if I’m about to go crazy. I didn’t even have money to pay the man a little something. I made a phone call and went to pick up some money for him, I took it to him and he was very happy. Thank you Lord for that.
I came home from running errands, sat and cried again. After a while I got on my computer and read a message from Tyler Perry ” Don’t Stay Too Long” and cried again. It was right on time, and it gave me that strength I needed to be strong. To stand, even though I don’t feel like it. After reading the message and thinking about Janae.. I thought I’m Blessed to have my only child/daughter living, and even though my heat went out in my van… at least it started up. There were people outside who had to go out and buy a whole new battery. I didn’t. I apologized to God for seeming so ungrateful today. I made dinner and took a nap. This too shall pass.
Here is the beautiful “right on time” email Tyler Perry sent out today.
I haven’t written in a while so this is a little long, but it’s so worth your time to read.
I was in Wyoming recently and I was taking in the beauty of the place. I mean, I love it. As I was looking up at the mountains I saw an eagle flying above me. I had to stop and take in its majestic beauty. I had never seen a real life eagle. All I had heard about an eagle was in church when the pastor said that the eagle pushes its young out of the nest to teach it to fly. It really did move me watching this bird that had no doubt been pushed out of the nest and had learned to do what I was watching it do.
I got back to the cabin that evening and I started doing some research on eagles. I was so excited to read the story of how it learned to fly. Well, to my surprise, eagles pushing their young out of the nest is a myth. I was shocked. I know that I heard a preacher say that in church… now I ain’t gonna say that that pastor lied but I will say he didn’t do the research… LOL. So I did it on my own. I did find some interesting facts that got me thinking about life… mine and yours. It’s funny how God can speak through everything. Here’s what I found.
Eagles build the biggest nest of all birds. It’s huge, comfortable and deep. One of the most interesting things that I found was the way that the eagle gets its young chicks to fly out of the nest. For many weeks it brings food to the nest. The little eagles have no worries, they have all they need to survive. But when the adult eagle deems that it’s time for the young eagles to fly, things get uncomfortable.
Now the young eagle doesn’t know that it’s time to fly, but the wisdom and the bird’s eye view of the mother knows that it’s time for the chicks to leave the nest. So you know what she does? She doesn’t bring food to the babies anymore, and this is what I found fascinating. Many times she will fly around the nest with the food in her beak so that the young eagles will be tempted or so hungry that they are forced to fly out of the nest and take it out of her beak. Stay with me I’m going somewhere here.
As I thought about this, I thought about my life and how many times I was in a very comfortable space. I had all I needed. There was no need for me to go any further because I was comfortable. I wanted to stay there forever. You have to be careful when you get comfortable and stay too long. It’s easy to stop dreaming when your belly is full. You won’t feel the need to fly at all.
The truth is, as long as I was there in that really comfortable space, I wasn’t fulfilling my own destiny or my purpose. I wasn’t flying, I was content. Remember this, your greatest prayers are not usually answered in comfort. Think about it. I can really get deep into this with stories from my past but you’re probably tired of reading already… LOL… so I’ll try and wrap it up.
It took an uncomfortable situation or being hungry to make me get out and fly. Many times in life things are going well, but then everything that was so great changes and we wonder why. We wonder what happened. We are caught off guard. I am of the opinion that in those times God, who knows when it’s time for us to leave the nest, is allowing it to become uncomfortable so that we can move on to our next mission in life. Our next hope, our next dream, our next level.
After not realizing this for many years and resisting changes and going through hell, I’m glad to say that I have become so sensitive to when it’s time to move that I will move without having to have the turmoil. I’m telling you I was so stubborn that the house had to burn down for me to move. Now I know better. I’m aware of when it starts to happen, like things happen that don’t make any sense. People you have been friends with or in business with or otherwise for years just seem to go crazy and you don’t know why. What I’ve learned in those moments is that it is a time to fly. Business changes, jobs go away, friends break your heart, marriages end, relationships end, and most times all these things are signs that it’s time to take flight to your next level.
Nobody likes change, I get it, but don’t be angry or bitter when things change. Don’t be mad with people, especially when you know you did right by them and you did all you could do for the friendship or relationship. I’m sorry to tell you this my friend, but this moment was not about them it was all about you. I’m telling you if God has allowed you to become so uncomfortable in your situation, whatever it is, then its time for you to move! Don’t be afraid, just fly!
Last thing and then I’m done ;-). there is one part of the eagle story that I haven’t told you yet, and this is my favorite part. If those baby eagles get out of the nest and they are trying to fly and it’s not going well, then that same mother bird that provided for them while they were in the nest, that same eagle will fly under the baby eagle to keep it from falling, to keep it on course, and give it a sense of security. God’s got you, don’t be afraid! He won’t let you fall!
Now here’s the question: what situation in your life has become so uncomfortable that you feel like you’re being starved for what you need? Maybe its God’s way of telling you it’s time to fly! It’s time to fly for your own dreams and your own hopes and goals. Fly for true love and real hope. This is your moment to fly, in 2014. Make this the year that you leave the nest without fear.
Talk to me, I’m listening,
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
So…. I’ve been getting my nails and brows done by Asians Shop owners HUSBAND AND WIFE… Amy and John. He does my nails and she does my brows. I’ve been going to them faithfully for 11-12 years straight!!! When I go to the shop John is the only person I let do my nails, and trust me, he wont let anyone in his shop do them anyway…. lol. She does nails too, but she specialize in brows. One day she was real busy and I walked in, she pointed to one of her other techs, and said to me… she can do your brow. I looked at her, I said Amy come here…. she said huh? I said LOOK, pointing to my eyebrows with a straight face, and so that no one else could hear… “NOBODY DO BROW BUT AMY OKAY”? She cracked up laughing!!!! She said okay, but she do good job. I looked at her and said I don’t care how long it takes… I’ll sit here and wait for you. She got my point, and so I waited for her. Now, there has been times in the past where I would le one of her gurls do my brows… because yes they did a great job. But if she’s there I will wait. But no one has ever, ever, ever, done my nails for 11-12 years except john. NO ONE EVER. Not one person.
Yesterday, as me and Nesha was entering the shop * I notice everything* I saw a note on the window saying that they’re open on Tuesdays. I know Amy and John close on that day. So, I walked in and OMG….I saw this Asian man sitting in John’s chair. I spoke to everyone there, and said” hey where is Amy and John?” The man sitting in John’s chair * I almost passed out seeing him sit there* he said they’re on vacation, they went back home , they will be back”. So, I’m like okay. Now, I’m standing there debating if I should leave out of the door or stay. I decided that since I wasn’t getting my nails done, that maybe I could try out one of these ladies to do my brows. So, we go and sit in the brow section, they “man sitting in john’s chair” kept looking at me. As he was doing that, I was looking around saying to Neshia, this place feels different. I said I don’t feel Amy and john’s SPIRIT around here. I can discern Spirits, and I didn’t feel them AT ALL.
As, I’m sitting in the chair looking around, the “man” is still doing nails and looking at me…. look around this shop. Then I see new things, and things moved a certain way from how Amy had them. I said to Nesha, NO… NO…. UM um that man is lying, this is his shop now. Nesha says ma, please don’t say nothing to that “man”, you gone embarrass me. I said gurl… something aint right around here and I know it. So, her phone ranged and that was my time to ask this “man”. One of those times he was watching me and done with his client…. I put my finger up and said come here okay? He came over to me. And I looked him dead in the eyes, and said in a real low voice….. tell the truth okay? Is this your shop now? He said Yes. He said Amy and John went back to their country because someone is very sick in the family * her mom or his mom* and they went back to take care of them. He said they didn’t want to leave and want to come back soon, but for now, I’m taking care of it for them. I said okay…. Thank you for telling me the truth. I said it doesn’t not feel for same in here. They had it fixed up very nice and cozy, but the point I’m making is, ITS NOT AMY AND JOHN. He went on to say that he would take care of me, and that he hopes I continue to do business there. I was happy, and told him that I look forward to it.
When it comes to a woman’s clothes, shoes, eyelashes, nails, hair, home. WE DON’T PLAY. We are very, very, very, picky. That’s just how we are. So, as the lady was doing my brows. I kept asking myself why am I letting her do this? Then I thought if Amy is not here and has no plans of returning, I have to learn to trust somebody. As she was doing them, my mind is spinning. I’m thinking Father God in the name of Jesus, please don’t let my facial expression * Nene Leakes* show how I’m feeling about her doing my brows. Please God let me be nice, and let me say the right things, in a nice voice. Please let my brows come out pretty. So, when I saw them, my facial expression was good and I love my brows.
I guess the point I’m making is….. I miss Amy and john, and for now I don’t know who is going to do my brows and nails. I’m sad…. so sad. Well, at least I do know how to always get in touch with my hairstylist Janine. Even though I don’t get my hair cut and curl often *I curl my own hair when its long* she is the ONLY, THE ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY one who I’ll let do it. She’s been doing my hair for 21 years since Nesha was 6 years old. I let someone experiment on my hair ONE time and that was it. *felt guilty too* lol No one has done my hair EVER SINCE * she can sang too * Janine * her in the photo above*
So, I’m feeling some kinda way today. I feel like I’ve been abandoned. 😦