Losing yourself in a MAN/BLOG

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Hey!

I was talking to one of my closets friends a few days ago about how she should make it her business to be around couples who are doing well for themselves  ((mainly husband and wives)) so that she can see how it LOOKS to be happy. She’s going through a WHOLE lot with her on and off again children’s father, and it kills me to see her this way. I believe with all my heart that she has lost herself in this man, and just don’t know how to get out. She’s a beautiful person, sweet as pie, but she allows herself to be mistreated and FINALLY she’s starting to see his true colors.

I know what its like to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t value you or what you bring into the relationship to take it to another level. Yes, I had my faults too, but in the end, I saw that he just wasn’t for me….. and that’s okay.

Coming to the conclusion that someone is not for you, is one of the hardest things for women. They know deep down in their hearts that the man they love is not for them, but they stay and HOPE things change. At some point, you gotta say this is it. That time comes when you start to feel that your self-esteem is low and not building, you cry easily, your feelings are  hurt, you find yourself wondering what he’s doing (( especially if he has a history of cheating)), you’re checking his FB page for new women or subliminal stats, going through his phone and texts. That’s not how you live life. That’s not how a good healthy  relationship should go.

If you haven’t seen your man in a few days, and  he see’s you, he starts going thorough your phone, watch out for him! Because if he feels you can and will do something sneaky within those days you both haven’t seen each other, then he needs to be VERIFIED as well.. Um cuse me! Again…… this is NOT how healthy relationships grow. Not good.

Look at Donald Trump. You see the way his wife pulled away from him as they exit the plane? Clearly a sign of manipulation going on in the relationship. She is not happy in that marriage. She probably feels that now he’s the President, he exercises even MORE Power, and feels there is no way out without retaliation from the public and especially from HIM.  Relationships and friendships should be happy. Yes, there will be problems, issues, misunderstandings and things of that nature. But to help in the loss of self-esteem, is not something ANYONE should experience.

In closing ask yourself.. DO I LOVE ME? What is it about me that allows him to treat me this way? What am I doing over and over again to allow this to continuously happen? If I leave him, what do I THINK he will do to me? Am I scared? Ask God to show you a pattern of his behavior. Tell yourself, that YES its going to be hard at first, then ask yourself can you eventually get over him? Tell and REMIND yourself that YOU WILL have to give up something (((( money, car, nice home, comfort, sex with HIM, security ))) for your PEACE. If you want to talk to me about your situation please feel free to email me DIRECTLY  longnosenikon@gmail.com  

I am LACREASE, and I dont have to do anything else!

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I have NO room to JUDGE/BLOG

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I was just in the bathroom thinking as I always do… too much sometimes. About all the mistakes I made in my teens and in my 20’s and early 30’s. The things I did, said. I will continue to give my advice, and I will always TELL THE TRUTH AND I DON’T CARE HOW MAD A PERSON GET AT ME… (( cause at the end of the day that’s YOUR story and NOT LACREASE ( mines)) .Forgive me.. but I say that with GREAT ARROGANCE! FRFR Because at the end of the day, I’m going to my apartment, CLOSE MY DOOR,  cross my legs turn on the TV, and that will still be YOUR story.

I came to the BIGGEST CONCLUSION…. looking back at MY life. I have absolutely NO ROOM AT ALL PERIOD… to JUDGE anyone ever!!! I really had my share of making bad decisions. I’m also happy that I can share them with others going through the same things. All I ask is that you TAKE WHAT YOU NEED FROM MY CONVERSATIONS and ADVICE.

I ask that you go down memory lane of all the things you did wrong IN YOUR EARLY DAYS, and ask yourself…. DO I HAVE ROOM TO JUDGE? Just remember this is NOT your story anymore, you are only a coach to someone.

I AM La’Crease and I don’t have to do ANYTHING ELSE

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La’Crease’s Ramblings/BLOG

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Last night I was in bed thinking back on some of the things I did as a teenager and in my 20’s and early 30’s and some of those things shock me. But you know I was Thanking God that I have lived long enough to ask for forgiveness and to change my ways. Just think had I died in the mist of  that mess. Some people do. They don’t get a chance to ask God for forgiveness, because  they were still doing wrong before they died. To me that’s one of the hugest blessings, that you can receive. To live long enough to repent of your wrong doings.

When I was dating my daughters father, we would be upstairs in his room when his mother was at Church all day. We knew she didn’t want him to have company when she wasn’t home, but we, being teenagers did it anyway. Well, she use to come home and I’d be up stairs. Even though she never came up there, she would holler up the stairs to let him know she was home. That’s when we knew he had to either sneak me out of the house when her bedroom door was closed, or I had to jump out of his bedroom window and he’d catch me at the side door. LOL Yea….. thinking back on that.  The person I am today, FIRST of all, I would never be in another woman’s home without her consent, for NO REASON. For TWO, I’m not jumping out of nobody’s window!!! We both laugh about that to this day, and we’ve shared this with our daughter, who knows the person I am today and she CANNOT BELIEVE that I jumped out of a window. LOL LOL Me either!!!!

I remember another time, one night I had lots of company over playing cards and drinking with my friends. I knew my landlord was coming over the next morning to collect rent. I lived in an upstairs flat and my friend lived downstairs. I would often leave my door unlocked because it connected to hers and we had kids that loved to play together. Well, after I let my company out that night, I meant to lock my door. I was so drunk that next morning. I woke up to my landlord standing over me trying to get me to wake up!!! I had puke all over the bed and floor, I was HORRIFIED TO SEE HIM. When I share this story with people for a life lesson, they always ask… was he trying to do something to you? And the answer is NOPE, not at all. He was trying to wake me up, because my door was wide open.He thought something was seriously wrong with me. I learned a GREAT LESSON that day. I don’t ever remember getting that drunk again! I was done with that life!

A few nights ago, I had this craaazy dream that I was at my mothers house, a house that’s not in real life at all. But I went to go see her, and when I got up to her apartment, I looked out of the window at my car as I always do. After a few hours had passed, I looked out again and it was gone!!! I was horrified and crying at the same time. We went to look around and to see was it any broken glass anywhere and it wasn’t, So we went back in the house. I couldn’t stop looking out of the window hoping that it would be there, or that I would wake up. Well, after a few hours had passed, I looked out the window again and it was there! In the very same spot. I told my mother and we went to look in it. We were so surprised that it was very brand new in the inside. The car looked the same on the outside, but it was clean inside out. Brand new stereo system, new seats, it even had a sun roof, it was beautiful.I took it for a ride and everything. In the dream we found out that a group of guys were going around taking people’s cars and fixing them up brand new, just to be helpful. They had done many others the same way, be we didn’t know about it. I was happy that everything was nice and new, but hated the fact that I thought I wasn’t going to see it again. Wow, I have the craziest dreams~!!

Talk to yall later

Cree

 

 

 

50,000 BLOG entry HITS/BLOG

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Hey Family!!! So guess what? I made it to 50,000 HITS on my BLOG!! Yea! I thought for sure by Christmas it would be that, but I guess not. I’m happy folks are reading and hopefully learning some Life Lessons.

Tonight I’m going to put together my menu plus other things for the Valentines Homeless Goody Bags! I think I’m going to make 3 huge pots of Spaghetti, dinner rolls and chicken. Last time we did it, they were asking for food, when we really had survival items. So now we know! LOL They made it loud and clear…… WE WANT FOOD!

I remember one day me and my mommy went to get us some ice cream at Ben & Jerry’s Downtown. We were sitting in the car licking away, when I looked over at a homeless man going into the garbage can. He got a hamburger out and ate it while walking away. OMG I just burst out crying. I cried and cried and cried. My momma knew it too, she said whats wrong, you saw what the man did? I said yes. I didn’t even want my ice cream anymore. Its so sad to see people so hungry that they would eat off the ground, garbage, tables, alley any place they can find food. I’ll never forget that day, it made me feel some kinda way. Doesn’t matter how they got in the situation, they are people too and need OUR help. Never forget that. Never mind how they came to be homeless, help them out and stop saying they need a job, and they got themselves in that condition in the first place. That pisses me off when I hear people say that. But those same ole people will get mad when their cars won’t start and cant find a friend or family member to pick them up!!! Stop it!

I just love love love this POWER COUPLE here in Detroit. This man owns his own Barber Shop, and will soon open a RESTAURANT!!! He’s doing his thang, and I love to see her right along with him.

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I AM La’Crease (( I don’t have to do ANYTHING else))

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Why You Mad?? My @tylerperry Response/BLOG

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Hey Family!!!! 🙂 🙂

Tyler Perry wrote-May 27, 2015

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day, and she was explaining to me how disappointed she was in people and the things that they do and have done to her. She went on and on about how upset and heartbroken she was, and has been, about some of her family and friends. She talked about how they hurt her and how she wished they would change and be better people. She wanted them to be different than the people they were.

Halfway through this complaint-a-thon, I asked her to take a walk with me in the backyard. Now, you have to know this particular friend of mine. She hates the heat, and it was a hot day. I said, “come on” so she reluctantly came with me.

We got outside and it was steaming hot. I could see that she was uncomfortable. Nevertheless, we kept walking around my backyard. As she was still complaining about people, I asked her what she thought of my grass. Mind you, in order to appreciate the grass you had to stand in the direct sunlight. She said “Wow, I love your grass. It’s beautiful, but it’s hot right here. Let’s cool off under that oak tree over there.”

So, as she started to walk to the tree I said, “No no, let’s stay here in the grass and cool off.”

She turned to me quickly and said, “We can’t cool off on this grass.”

Right then, I said to her, “But you just said the grass was beautiful.”

“I did” she replied. Then, I asked her, “Why won’t you stay here?” She said, because she was hot and the grass couldn’t cool her off. So, we walked over to the oak tree and sat there.

She said, “Now you see? This is what I needed.”

Then I asked her this question. “The grass was beautiful. You loved it. Why didn’t you get mad with the grass because it couldn’t provide the shade you wanted?

She was confused, so I went on to explain myself. “People in this world, whether they were created a certain way or became that way through life’s circumstances, are who they are. Stop wishing they will be someone else.”

I said, “The next time you get upset with someone because they can’t do, or can’t be what you want them to be, remember the grass. Never get mad at a blade of grass because it’s not a tree. Appreciate the grass for what it is. Let it provide to you what it can, but don’t expect more. Your life will get so much easier when you start letting people be who they are and stop expecting them to give you what they don’t have or don’t know how to give. Just like that grass couldn’t provide shade because it wasn’t made to, some people are not made to give you what you’re asking for. So, stop looking for it. You will be shocked at how much peace you find when you really get this.”

And the last thing I said to her was this. “You wouldn’t be so frustrated with people who are like the grass if you had more people who are like trees in your life.”

I could really go deep into this, but I gotta go back to work. Talk to me. What do you think?

Love y’all. Talk soon

My Response:

I love Tyler Perry’s messages because they always make ME think. I wake up everyday to learn a new lesson, I may not get it sometimes, but trust me.. I FILE EVERYTHING IN THE BACK OF MY MIND, BECAUSE I KNOW ONE DAY, ONE DAY.. IM GOING TO NEED TO PULL IT OUT, EXAMINE IT, AND FINALLY GET THE LESSON.

In this lesson, it took me a long time to get how people were. I use to get mad at people for not acting the way I felt they should act, and I would be done with them. I learned that you have to meet people where they are!!! In this life you’re going to meet a lot of people,  we all have different personalities. When we meet someone ((( IN PERSON))), they are exactly who they act out. That’s who they are…. and its okay… BUT CAN YOU DIG IT? I learned that I didn’t have to stay in that persons life because they didn’t act how I felt they should have. I don’t have to be their enemy, or be angry/mad with them either. There is always a lesson and reason why we come face to face with people who do things differently and act differently. Some people try to put a size 10 shoe on a 5 feet. Meaning, you can’t make people fit into what you feel they should be. Take them for face value,  get the lesson you need from them, and KEEP IT MOVING. I’m so glad that I came to a place in my life where I can get along with ANYONE…. its so crazy because in my 20’s and early 30’s…. Um Um…. NOPE! LOL In my late 40’s…… listen… I come to your life for LIFE LESSONS… not to talk on the phone all day, not to gossip, but to exchange stories and life experiences that we may have that can heal us together, or even make us laugh.

For Example: My Sister Peedie…IMG_2134 is always late for EVERYTHING. It use to BURN me up when we would all meet over to our parents house for pizza and laughs, she would plan the party for 5.. but always be there after 6. She does this  for every function we have. If I say the gathering is at 4, she’ll blow my phone up asking me what time am I leaving, that way she would know how long she has to BS before leaving out her house. LOL.. I use to be MADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD at her. On fire. I use to wish that just one time, she would be on time. When God bought me to really examine this situation that bothered me so much… it BLESSED ME. He said.. your sister has been doing this for as long as you can remember. This is who she is. She won’t be on time, stop looking for her to be. This is your sister and how she does things. Get over it. Then I thought its OKAY.. ITS OKAY…. its funny now, because we make jokes and laugh about how late she’s going to be. I get it. I can’t make her to be a person on time, she’s always been this way. This is apart of her personality. ((( She’s always on time for work tho))) LOL LOL  I no longer “wish” she would be on time… I Thank God that she always shows up  ALIVE AND WELL

Now let me add this… I can call that SAME SISTER…. ask her for $20.00, she’ll bring me $40.00. One day I needed to borrow $20.00 she put a $100.00 BILL in my hand, we were talking so much, when she left, I realized what it was. If you call her for money SHE IS ALWAYS THERE. If you need a ride, she’s there ** late of course lol **, if you need to talk, she’s always there. If you need a favor or anything… she’s there. She always have it and if she don’t she’ll get it for you. God had to me to see that. I learned to look FOR STRENGTHS IN OTHER AREAS of a person, instead of focusing on their weakness. She wont be on time for anything, but if you EVER EVER EVER NEED HER… SHE IS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS THERE FOR ME AND ANYBODY ELSE!!!! So, after thinking about it…. ITS OKAY… IT REALLY IS OKAY.. that she’s not a person to be on time, because she has so many other things about her that I LOVE. I LOVE MY BABY SISTER.

I AM La’Crease ((I don’t have to do anything else))

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Life Lesson………….. Crees Blog Entry

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*Me driving in the video one Summer *  Without going into details.. For the last year and a half… I have been though a lot. Mainly with life changes nothing concerning my health, just life changing things to get me out of my comfort zone. My family is fine,  and my daughter. It was ME… who needed to learn the LIFE LESSON.
I see things from a different eye. I’m not as sensitive. I feel so strong and so BOSSED UP. Where ever God is taking me… I know for a fact… that I have to be a Strong Woman of God. I am so strong, and so not into the mess and small talk. I am really proud of myself. I am really strong.
I’m so sick of Whining Wimpy Women… attention needing to be on them Women. I’m not dealing with a lot of stuff no more. I’m just NOT!! I’m not putting ANY ENERGY TO ANYONE OR ANYTHING that takes me out of my square.
So……. with that said…… Thank you Jesus for where you are taking me. Thank you for the Life Lesson and the Experience. Its been a bumpy ride…. but you know ME…. I DON’T/WON’T GIVE UP. 🙂 
BE BLESSED
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Offended turned Correction………..Crees Blog Entry

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I remember when I first started going to my Church, Second Ebenezer. I would sit in the back because I was new and didn’t want to be seen or heard. I never imagined myself sitting in the front rows, to me it seemed as if you were there longer…. that was YOUR spot. At my Church you could “come as you are” and that was one of the main reasons for me joining at that time in my life. I didn’t have a wide selection of dress clothes, and the little I had, I could mix them up with dress pants, and jeans.

 

As time went on I became comfortable, and started sitting in the first 5 rows every Sunday. One day I wore a dressy skort. It was my favorite outfit. But one of the older ladies of the church came over to me and placed a lap scarf over my legs with a smile, and walked away. I WAS SO OFFENDED. Not to mention EMBARRASSED. In order for her to come over to place the scarf over MY leg, SHE must have felt that my skort was too short. Boy was I on fire in that service.

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After service, I never mentioned it, I just went home. But it stayed on my mind. I couldn’t shake the feeling that she did that. I knew that if I called and told several of my friends what had happened, they would tell me that she was out of order, that she was wrong, that I shouldn’t go back there again, that I should have confronted her about it. But I’m not the type of person who will call my Sisters or Friends and say… “Let me tell you what this lady did to me “. I go to God… all the time. Because what I found out in doing that is…..friends will tell me what seem right to THEM. Maybe a few of them would ask to see the skort, and say…. yeah maybe that is too short. We tend to ask people just to hear “their opinion” when in reality, our mind is already made it that we were “offended”. There’s nothing else to be said, nothing to be discussed. I felt offended…. and that’s final.

 

It stayed on my MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIND…. yes it did. Every time I went to Church and saw that woman… it was on my mind. I never got an answer from God at that time when I felt that way. But he surely reminded me of it when it was my time to “get it”. As time went on ( been there for 20 years now) I started to build my wardrobe. For some reason I didn’t want to wear jeans any more. My mentality had changed in the way I dressed. I was very conscience of the way this woman of God carried herself. I cared about the way I dressed in the house of the Lord. I knew better, and I did better. I would see women coming in church with their cleavage showing, with short dresses and skirts. And I remember thinking…. wow.. people come to the house of the Lord…. any old kinda way. THEN, God bought back to MY remembrance, of when I was wearing my short skort…. I didn’t think it was too short. But as you leave the MILK… and start eating solid food… you see things totally different than you did before. God had answered my question. I had every reason to be offended… when I didn’t know any better. When I knew better, and dressed better, and respected the way I felt about myself….. I understood. That lady wasn’t trying to hurt my feelings or offend me ….. she helped me. I would never in my life wear that skort again. Never ever. It was so short. I wouldn’t even wear it outside. I’m not a person who care if someone likes my shoes or boots. My clothes or anything that I wear. BUT I DO CARE if someone says… your dress, skirt or skort is too short. As a woman of God.. that would be something , that I TAKE CARE OF ON THE SPOT … EVEN IF I FELT DIFFERENTLY. I don’t want men staring at me, or coming on to me because of the way I dress. I don’t want my breast hanging out, or cleavage showing. I don’t want my behind showing, and I want to be covered up.

 

What I learned in this Life Lesson that I’ll never forget is that… there are some things in the house of the Lord that YOU JUST DONT DO when you know better. IF……. you know better. Ask God to show you if you’re wrong about being “offended”. I was use to dressing the way ” I wanted” and felt that I was in the house of the Lord. I came to hear the word not to be judged. No one had any BUSINESS to correct the way I dressed.

 

Seasoned Christians know better. Babes in Christ….. will have to learn.

New Living Translation 1 Corinthians 3:2
I had to feed you with milk, not with solid food, because you weren’t ready for anything stronger. And you still aren’t ready,

*photo with friends is the skort I wore to Church*
*photo above is how I looked at the lady when she places the scarf over my legs*

 

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy