*Sitting on the dock of the bay*

Hey!!!

Thank you Jesus for the past week!!! I had a wonderful week of studying my bible and for the closeness I have with our Father!!! What a week.

I am getting ready for a few things this summer. My Sister Pearls * ladies that I met on Tyler Perry\’s message board* are meeting in ATL for our yearly meet. We\’ve added a new member and she\’s wonderful. We cant wait to meet her this Summer. We are almost ready to go, gotta few more things to take care of and its on!!! I\’m so excited about this. We have been through the storm , but its all clear now and we have moved on from those dark days.

Late at night when I\’m lying in bed. I Thank God for all he\’s done for me. He truly loves me and I know this for myself. I\’m always thinking about where he\’s bought me from. I\’m 40 years old, my daughter is in her Senior year at Wayne State University. The years of raising her had its ups and downs, mainly I was learning a lot of different things. One thing about those days I hate most are, that people that knew me from back then, always remind me of how mean I use to be. One day me, my sister and our 2 God sisters were going to the MGM Grand Casino downtown Detroit for dinner, and my God sister mentioned a time when I use to be soooo mean to them * I\’m the oldest*. It killed me to sit there and listen to her stories, but it was true. Which brings me to this. I asked God why is it so hard for me to get people to be nice and kind to each other, to treat each other with Love and respect? I\’m not sure if I got the answer yet, but I think its because I was so mean for so long, that for all the times I was mean, I have to go back and undo those times, plus gain. Did anyone get that? Like Paul he use to be off the hook!! But when he was blinded and then God made him see again, he knew that God was real. And so all the people that he prosecuted, he had to go back and undo those people he sent down the wrong path, PLUS gain new believers. I guess I dunno. I get frustrated sometimes, because I am so not that person anymore. But it still lingers in my mind how I use to be. And I just hate that!!! I have forgiven myself………..for sure. The more I talk to young gurls about their attitudes, the way they carry themselves, sex, men, anything, they still don\’t want to come out of it. But I\’m going to talk to them till I\’m blue/purple in the face. Somebody talked to me, * wait…….. everyone talked to me* and I owe it to myself/others to do the same . When I think about it, I didn\’t come right out of my ways but when I did, I went into my *mental archives* and pulled out all the *Pearls of Wisdom* notes that people dropped in my Spirit and I applied them. And that\’s why I\’m the person I am today. I Thank God. Thank you, Thank you Lord for changing the way I think and look at life. Thank you!!!

I guess I won\’t be going to see Janet Jackson on Sept 27 here at the Palace. I\’m sick about it too. I couldn\’t find anyone to go with me. People always complain about how much stuff cost, never having Faith. But when they see me doing well, or me doing things, they always want to know *whats the secret*? Wondering how I\’m able to do this and do that. Please –I have stupid, mad, IGNANT FAITH!!! No one can ever put me in a box. If I want something I\’ll get it, and if * dad* says No, then that means NO! I so understand that. I so understand. But in the meantime, I will ask. I wish that I was going to see my gurl. Come Sept 27, I\’m going to be one sad gal.

For many years, I never wanted to do things alone. I always wanted or felt I needed someone to do them with me. I\’m glad I\’m not like that anymore, because I would be home many and plenty of times. I think I first came out of it about 5 years ago. I started off going to the movies alone. LOL That was a trip my first time. Every time someone asked me to go with them, I\’m always there, always the one driving, always saying–yeah lets go!!! But as soon as Lacrease wanted to go to the movies or to see Anita Baker, no one * had money* so they say. So I said wait– up hold. Why is it that every time Mary J Blige come to town, Jahiem, Usher, and everybody else, I\’m always there with them to see *their favorites*, but as soon as Anita Baker comes to town I end up buying one ticket? LOL I told my gurls, I got yall. When yall see my doing things and not asking yall, don\’t get mad, don\’t ask how, just say gone gurl!! LOL I\’m not waiting on nobody no more. I\’m doing my thang. I\’m not mad at nobody, if ya wanna go, call me if not oh well SEE YA! LOL

My coworker said to my Sister this week when she was in Walmart shopping. Its because of Lacrease we don\’t go out to dinner anymore. I said NO BOO, its because of YOU we don\’t go out to dinner anymore. I said YOU don\’t like to drive. Every time we go somewhere you expect for me to pick you up. I said you have a car just like the rest of us. I said when I call everybody up to make plans, then I feel that I should drive. I said you never call the dinner dates, because you don\’t want to drive. I said I love to drive, I would drive any and every time we go * I did too at least 4 times* but when I realized that you ALWAYS want somebody to pick you up. I haven\’t even bothered to ask. THEN………… on the way of dropping her off at home, here she comes with a * stop here, stop there request* GURL BYE! She got me messed all the way up–for real! LOL I aint finna do all that!!! I love her to pieces tho. But I had to put an end to our Sunday Gurls Dinner at the Casino.

Since I\’m not going to see Janet, that same day her tickets went on sale, I decided to put down payment on a cruise with my coworker and her Family Reunion for next Oct 25- Nov 1 2009. Yep, a whole week, and its my first cruise. Yeaaaaaaaa. The whole trip including airfare and pass port is only $1500.00. I\’ll have a whole year plus to pay on it. They said the time to start shopping for clothes is NIGH!!! LOL So Imma start buying when fall sets in. The clothes are clearance and Ill have them for next year. I\’m excited. Too bad I don\’t have a special someone to go with me. Well if I did, he would have to be a straight up friend, because I don\’t trust myself too much to go with a guy I liked. No way!!! LOL

Yesterday my coworker asked me would I take her grand daughters Ipod home so that my daughter could download her some songs on to it. I asked my daughter if it was okay, she said yeah sure. She had it wrapped up with her list of songs. So when I got home, my daughter asked for it. She went to turn it on, and it wouldn\’t come on. My daughter said to me, did this thing work when she gave it to you? I said yeah, I test it and came on. Its a brand new Ipod, it should work. I didnt drop it, because mines was in the same bag as hers. I didnt have it by water. I couldnt figure out what was up with this gurls Ipod. We looked at each other and we said Oh goodness, how am I going to tell this lady, that this Ipod doesn\’t turn on/work? How can we prove this? How can we even communicate this stor
y to her. I\’m like OH GOD PLEASE HELP US!!!! Trying to be nice. I bought 3 Ipods, each time they came out with one, I bought it, because me and Neisha both love music. I paid $$$$$$$ for them too. So, I\’m saying to myself, I guess Imma have to come up off one of mines to replace hers. Then I kept saying naw, naw there has got to be a reason why this isn\’t coming on. So we tried charging it with our charger, and left it charging all night. My daughter was frustrated, I was just going crazy in my mind. We didn\’t even get a chance to see what the child had on the thang, we couldn\’t even turn it on. Before I went to bed, I laid my hands on the Ipod and prayed. Neisha went to bed puzzled and feeling bad– * Us Virgos*. I laid in bed 4 am this morning, thinking about that Ipod. God said: Lacrease don\’t worry about it, just go to sleep you gotta go to work in the morning. Each time I heard that I wouldn\’t say……..OK. I would just keep going over in my head, how did I get myself into this? After a while I got sleepy. I heard God say: Lacrease don\’t worry about it. That time was different. I said OK. And then I felt peace. I went to sleep.

This morning I got up to use the bathroom , then went into my office straight to the Ipod. I went to unplug the charger and then I tried to turn in on. NOTHING. I was glad my coworker didn\’t have to work today because I would have to tell her what happened, and I wasn\’t ready yet. I went on to work, and this white lady * I like to describe the person* and her 2 daughters came through my line and somehow we got to talking about Ipods. Something * God* told me to ask the gurls how do you turn on the newer model of the old Ipods. The gurl was happy to explain to me. She said press down the Menu button at the same time you press down the circle in the middle. I started thinking about ours and you only have to press down the start play/pause button. I\’m like COOL!! I came home this afternoon, went straight to the Ipod and did exactly what she said to do, and it came right on!!! Oh goodness. I kept on saying Thank you Jesus. Thank you Lord!!! I\’m glad I didn\’t have the attitude I had back in the day. I was willing to give up one of mines just to make things right. How can you tell a young gurl, her Ipod doesn\’t work anymore and you were the last one with it? The songs are downloaded and I will return it on Monday.

Mr. Tyler Perry sent out 2 emails this week. They really blessed me. Tyler doesn\’t know it yet tho, but God has huge plans for him. He thinks he\’s going to be making movies all his life– nope I can\’t see that. Its going to be greater than that. And I\’m going to watch it all go down. That\’s why I adore him because he Minister to the people. A lot of people go to his board and they are really going through. I mean its sad sometimes, they are looking for a word from God through Tyler. Its almost like he\’s a Minister. By sending those messages out, he has truly started something positive. They/we need him. I just hate the fact that when he needs to vent about something, they want to ask him why this and why that. He needs a shoulder to cry on too. OOOO you just cant tell some people nothing!!! People expect you to walk around with glue, and duck tape all the time, patching up their things, but when you need them to listen………….they cant understand why YOU are going through. Like you don\’t use the bathroom , and call 911. OK, did I just get mad? LOL I can be sarcastic. Keep on blessing people Tyler. I\’m always, always praying for you!!!

Tomorrow is my mother\’s Birthday she\’s 59. Well today is her Bd its after 12. She is giving herself a Birthday Party, and she is cooking up some stuff too. She told my brother today on the phone when he asked her what she wanted for her BD. I want this cell phone, but I think Z * that\’s me * got it for me. I said NO I didn\’t get it momma. She said O. HEHEHE I DID GET IT, BUT SHE IS NOOOOOOISY!!! LOL She wanted that phone for the longest. I got it for her, but Imma give it to her when everyone leaves after dinner. Imma let her go the whole day without it. LOL I love my momma. She is my gurl!!! I mean she is sooooooooo sweet and cool. We have been best friends since I was a young gurl, when she told me all her secrets. They are in my head to this day. And that\’s where they will stay.

Aiight, let me go and write some parts of my book. GOD GOT SOMETHING IN MY BELLY OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I\’M PREGNANT!!! Let me get busy y\’all. I love you all so so so very much. Thanks for all the hits on my page * LOTS OF THEM TOO* and the lovely messages. I will continue to keep my comment page closed, because I love to write and be free.

This song below is for Mr. Tyler Perry!

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