Lately I’ve been thinking about LOVE and how different people accept it. I was talking to someone about it just today, and I came to the conclusion that many people can’t accept LOVE for themselves as you would give to them. Mainly because they don’t feel they deserve it. LOVE is a word that’s so clear to me. I was raised by it, and SHOWN LOVE by my parents and my family. So, I am JAMMED PACKED with LOVE. But it always seem to me that I give it too freely to those who don’t have a clue as to how it works.
I am NOT a mechanic… so to be honest *and since I drive a brand new car*, I cant TELL YOU WHERE THE OIL GOES. We take it to the shop and they put it in when its time. Now, that would annoy a MECHANIC because in their minds… they figure if you have a car the least you can do is find out where all your oils and other fluids go. LOL But its not important to me. This example has certainly helped me to understand that since I HAVE SO MUCH LOVE TO SHARE…. not everyone is willing to get to know more about it.
I met Neisha’s dad when I was turning 18, on my 19th Birthday I had her. I LOVED her dad so much it was crazy. I didn’t see that, it was just that he showed me LOVE and I showed him LOVE. But then something changed…..something I didn’t understand…… he wanted to be with other women. He didn’t want to lose me, but at the same time, he knew that there was another world out there and he wanted to be apart of it. People look for different things in different people. He knew that I would be a GREAT MOTHER, he knew how motherly I was, so he knew that his daughter would grow up to be someone of importance to the body of Christ. But he was looking for a woman to take care of him. He LOVE flashy clothes, NICE FANCY CARS, money, and the center of attention in EVERY ROOM he walked in. I wasn’t about that life.
I wanted a Husband, a relationship with God, a family, nice paying jobs working with kids, . At that time I couldn’t understand how you can tell somebody you LOVE them but still desire other women. I knew that I LOVED him hard. One day, I’ll never forget…. I was washing dishes and I heard God say…. you LOVE him more than you LOVE ME. I said God……. Oh no I don’t….. NO WAY. Soon after that I found out that her dad was cheating on me with the gurl who lived downstairs…. I DISCONNECTED from him totally. Never to look at him in the same light. It was so easy. Then I started wondering……dang did I really LOVE him? LOL But when I did that …..I found out something I didn’t know about myself.
I found out that I LOVE people, I love to laugh and have fun. I have never had a physical fight, but I love to debate something dear to my heart. I am always the life of the party, knowing everybody, having a personal story to share with everyone I come in contact with. I also found out that as much as I LOVED AND SHOWED SOMEONE I LOVED THEM….. I COULD EASILY DISCONNECT. A gift that I need dearly to weed out BOOT LEG…. NON DESERVING OF MY LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP PEOPLE. I was so amazed at how much LOVE AND TIME I put into Neisha’s dad,. not knowing how quickly I could disconnect from him. I didn’t know I had this gift. OH God knows how much I NEED IT. LOL Of course we are good friends to this day…..but he knows, he can’t get 5 minutes of conversation from me. LOL
The point I’m making is different people want different things. Some people are motivated by FAME. Some people are motivated by FLASHY CARS, CLOTHES AND THINGS. Some people are motivated by having lots of children to love and take care of, some people are motivated by people telling them how Good they look. It is so important not to get caught up on someone who wont understand your motivation. It has to compliment you or the relationship/friendship wont work.