I don’t remember if I asked God to give me a “DON’T CARE” button, but I sure have one now and I’M LOVING IT!
In my late 20’s and early 30’s I could tell you how I felt about something, be right about it, and then BEG YOU NOT TO BE MAD AT ME FOR SAYING IT. Even though I meant it, I HATED the fact that someone was mad at me. I hated going to bed mad at someone, or someone being mad at me. I QUICKLY LEARNED that not everyone grew up forgiving like I was. I believe with all my heart it stems from my childhood.
Growing up, my siblings and I would get into arguments and debates, we had to finish out the argument, hug, kiss and make up ON THE SPOT! We couldn’t let a moment pass without saying I’m sorry. We were never allowed to fist fight at all, and I believe that’s the reason why we’re so very close to this day. I realized at some point in my late 30’s early 40’s that was the reason why I had a hard time saying what I meant and felt to someone, without feeling guilty about it later. I found out that when you say what you mean to some people, they don’t want to hear your truth, so they get mad at you for saying it, but blame it on the way it was present. I thought, maybe I worded what I meant wrong. But I soon come to realize that people are going to get mad at you just because you told them the truth!
Another thing I realize about myself. If someone comes to me and tell me their story, or their truth about a situation I may NOT have anything to say. I learned that I don’t have to comment on everything. I can just be a listener. If someone have a problem with me, Ill listen to it, and if its IMPORTANT… I’ll address it. But if NOT … Ill keep it moving. I learned that!! Its so fun not to have a comment about EVERYTHING. Especially when people expect for you to react and have something to say. My boo works HOMICIDE..I had to learned how to keep it moving! People are so use to ME.. LACREASE having a word, but sometimes I don’t. They feel that since I’m quiet about something… I’M NOT ON THEIR SIDE. LOL LOL People are so funny. I’m so glad that I have learned this about myself, and its okay.
People will HATE the fact that you’re not the same person you USE to be when you knew them. This is why my connection to people is ABOUT BUSINESS, TRUTH AND HONESTY. I know what I’m getting from you, and you know what you’re getting from me. I use to be so mentally tied into people that it was CRAZY! I love hard… I’m sorry. I do my own thing now, if we talk, we TALK.. if we don’t, we DON’T. If we’re use to going to functions together all the time, and I tell you that I want to stay home and chill… THAT’S WHAT THE HELL THAT MEAN. I don’t care if you’re mad. I don’t give a dayum! I’m not calling or texting you asking if you’re mad at me like I use to do. I don’t care. If you cant face my truth oh well.. SEE YA ON JUDGEMENT DAY!
I’m a different LACREASE… I do my OWN thing. If I change my mind about something, dammit that’s what the hell it is. I’m not tied or contracted into any friendships. And who ever don’t like it.. PUSH CARTS AND WAIT FOR A CHECK!
When you can come to conclusions about YOUR PEACE and YOUR TRUTH… OH WELL TO THOSE WHO “FEEL SOME TYPE OF WAY about it!”
I AM La’Crease…and I don’t have to do anything else!
Inside the mind of cree 