How I Lost And Gained Back My SELF ESTEEM/BLOG/PART 1 OF 2

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When I think about my purpose in life sometimes, all I can think of is that I’m suppose to be helping other women. I say that because no matter where I am, or what I’m doing, women always talk to me, and its usually about their issues with themselves, men, and getting over past hurt.

I can remember so clearly many things I’ve been through, and I’m so happy that I don’t hold grudges at all. Maybe that’s why I can help others because I’ve moved on from so many things, and it just doesn’t bother me anymore. I can talk about it and help others at the same time.

With social media being so popular these days women often compare themselves to others, and that is a NO NO. They look at other women and what they have in a man, and how their body is shaped and they care so much in how to please a man, that they lose themselves. Sex these days is  to show off their sexual skills, and to be one of the first to do things differently to a man to make him feel good. Why are women doing this? Listen, when you start a job, you are a temp. You have to get past 90 days to impress your boss and even more days at some jobs to get benefits. Why are women giving these trial men benefits? What have they done to deserve all of that?  A woman will let a man come and stay with her and her kids after knowing him a month. But a man  will not even think about letting a woman come stay with him. Some of these men just wake up in the morning, and their is a women to do everything for him on that day. He won’t have to do a thing but breathe, and have sex with her. A woman who has no kids at him, living single, will NEVER let a man come stay with her. She loves and enjoys her freedom. He’ll have to have his own thing going on.

Some women are afraid to lose a man,  especially if she feels she doesn’t have a “grip” on him.  Sometimes women feel that if they don’t make happy the man they like, he’ll get away. This is why they’re settling for the man who show  the most attention. Who wants to stay with a man who cheats? Why do women give these men so many chances? Don’t they know that if a woman cheat on her man, and he finds out about it, he will DISS HER IN A NEW YORK MINUTE? Men don’t play that? They cannot stand the thought of another man up in their woman. No way! Women with low self esteem are the ones who give chance after chance, after chance after chance. They’re so afraid of being alone and not ever finding the right man, they will settle for a temporary until better comes along.

In the next blog entry, I will share my story of how I got my self esteem BACK!

Next Part 2.. How I built my self esteem up

Chopin Script Regular

@neneleakes I’M SO PROUD OF YOU/BLOG

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Hello Family!

Wow what a breakthrough for Nene Leakes, MEEEE and hopefully the others on the show.

Father God in the name of JESUS… I hope thousands and thousands saw tonight’s RHOA and got in on the healing that took place at the end of the show. When Part 1 of RHOA Reunion Show aired… I kept looking at Nene real hard, it was something in her eyes that told me she was at a breaking point, sorta at a place where she didn’t want to fight anymore. A place where she just wanted to agree and not argue or debate. She’s enjoying much success in her life, and sometimes that could be hard when your past keeps coming back to remind you of where you came from.

I cried like a baby watching her breakthrough. For the first time since I met her on RHOA, I finally UNDERSTAND her. I get it. I get her. Lets all be real here NENE LEAKES IS RHOA! Flat out. She’s the driver of the show, and people want to be her friend. She’s funny, she keeps it real, she’s loyal (( she can throw shade)), and she seems to be a person who will help you out if you need her. I found out tonight that LOYALITY is EVERYTHING to her. Support means A LOT, and she looks for people close to her to be just that. She EXPECTS it.. and I’m so glad CYNTHIA BAILEY got up and went back stage with her. I cried. I cried. I cried. Even though they had fallen out, Cynthia looked at it like this….. “that’s MY FRIEND past or present… I know we’re not talking right now… and that’s cool.” “But she’s in a lot of pain and I cannot/will not sit on this couch and watch her go through this without me being there for her.” That was so big of her, and you can clearly see it in Nene’s face how she felt about Cynthia being there for her. She even Tweeted it. Ah… I was so proud of Nene and Cynthia.

Nene has ABANDONMENT issues steming from NOT ONE.. but both parents. I found out in my study that people who have these issues from parents…. often come off as being “tough” “aggressive” “argumentative ” and “defensive”. ((( MY dad))) I will share that story later))) They’re looked at as being SOOOOO tough, that people tend to overlook the fact that they too have issues. That they need loyal friends in their lives to listen to them as well. But the thing is… its not easy for these people to open up. Because they’re so busy being an ear for others. It may take a while for them to draw near to someone, but when they do…. they expect for them to be LOYAL to the end. When you see their number on the caller ID, and they need you, you better answer. And I see this in Nene. Now I see why she always say “you haven’t been a friend to me.” Being a friend to her is VERY SERIOUS.

Her husband found out this same thing. I LOVE him for her, because this time around he got it. She loves him, he knows her heart, and she trusts him. All she wants is to be loved and to be able to trust someone with her heart, her past, and her future. UM UM UM. Nene is wore out from arguing with these group of women. She’s tired. And she have good reason.

What I want to tell Nene is that….. the reason why your mom sent you and your sibling(s) to live with your aunt.. is because

YOU WERE THE STRONGER ONE.

SHE KNEW IT.

SHE DIDNT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT YOU.

She knew that you would make it. She knew that in order for your other siblings to survive… she had to send her strongest child. LOOK AT YOU NOW… and I say that in HARD WORK.. not in licking your tongue out to her or anyone else in your family as in.. Nah- nah- nah- nah- nah. SHE KNEW YOU WERE STRONG, SHE KNEW YOU WOULD BE SUCCESSFUL.. Its okay Nene.. its okay. Cry everyday if you need too. Cry every night before bed. Allow yourself to ask questions… be submissive, be humble. GO BACK AND DEMAND answers from anyone you need to ask questions. GET YOUR ANSWERS, TAKE THEM HOME, PRAY OVER THEM, COME TO YOUR CONCLUSION…. THEN KEEP IT MOVING. In humbleness….. and UNDERSTANDING.

I also found out that having these types of issues from a mother… causes miscommunication/communication problems……WITH other WOMEN. Tonight, I looked at every woman on that stage, and Nene has slayed everyone of them with that tongue of hers * lol*. NENE can handle them all!!! LOL LOL I know it, the world knows it, and Nene knows it. But she’s tired of fighting with these gurls. And of course she doesn’t want/need to hear what she has done in the past. She needs forward healing, where she can get the answers she needs from her past, and then be able to MOVE ON!!! I found out that a person will say to themselves.. if my mom has done this to me and I have gotten over it.. “WHAT CAN ANYBODY ELSE DO TO ME?” And so they take on these thoughts, go out into the world, and fight anyone who comes for them. In their minds, they have enough energy to go around. But if you allow that negative energy to come into your space.. you’ll start thinking …….. How does my then match up with my NOW * which is so great and successful* and you wonder if you deserve this? Or, you wonder how did I come to this place, when my past was far from good.

It was a JOY to see NENE so humble, and giving them whatever they needed to hear **you’re right, and I’m wrong**… in the name of PEACE.

You don’t have to fight anymore boo. You are Nene Leakes and you don’t have to do anything else!!!

I AM La’Crease ((( and I don’t have to do anything else)))

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Listen to yourself and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God. – Dr. Maya Angelou

21 Day -Challenge Updates/Women * get it together* ((((((BLOG))))))

building

 

Hey,

Its day 9 into the 21- Day May Challenge, and I lost a total of 6 pounds!!! Yeaaa. I’ve been drinking lots and lots of water, no juice or pop. For the last few days I’ve been eating strawberries and kiwi. Surprisingly, lots of corn on the cob and raw broccoli out of the bag too. OOO, its so good. I have a bag of apples I have yet to touch. I have to be in a mood for apples and oranges and when I do, I go weeks having it for breakfast daily. I must have ice cold water, I keep them in the freezer. So, yeah I’ll keep updating, it seems to help me on this journey.

Yesterday I was watching ID and wow, there are so many gullible women out there. We have to do better with meeting men, because after 4 weeks declaring that its okay to move them in is not cool. If a man or woman don’t have themselves together, stop trying to date them. Let them get on their feet first. A real man or woman wouldn’t even want to start a relationship until they get themselves in order. By the time the woman realize the “nothing nut” aint no good, he has gotten so comfortable that he doesn’t want to leave. Then the kids are involved and its a big ole mess. Stop being so needy!!! This is one thing that kills me about women. Instead of enjoying peace in your own place, some rather move in a man so that they can “watch” them, make sure they’re not cheating. Its hard to keep watch on a married man these days, so stop trying to keep it on a 4 week old “boyfriend”.

These days people feel pressured to do something, to fit in with what everybody else is doing. Stay in your own lane, do your own thang. Stop always looking over seeing what others are doing, just to desire if for yourself. Now if it motivates you do it… but be your own woman.

Be Blessed
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

My Town & Country……..gone Crees Blog Entry

my baby
So, my van was found Thursday afternoon by the Detroit Police Department. I went to see it yesterday the damage was bad, they tore it up.
2002 creasy
 
 
When I first bought this van it was so clean it looked brand new. These clowns ripped the second and third row seats out to do their dirty work. My windshield was busted, they hit something and tore off the whole front bumper. The battery was hissing, and front passenger door opens not even half way. The hood wont close, the ignition was tore up and it was so dirty in the inside. The Spirit was gone away from my baby. I LOVED that Town & Country. I prayed and prayed and prayed for years and years and years for God to give me one. And I finally got it. It never gave me any problems, I drove it to Atlanta and back, plus around the city for a year before some GOONS came into my apartment complex and stole it. I’m just so outdone by this. Exactly two days later I got the call I’ve been waiting for… a job at Detroit Public Schools. All I could say at that time is GOD ARE YOU SERIOUS? I’m glad I was honest to them about my situation, so hopefully soon I can come up with something, so that I can start back working. I’ve never had this to happen to me before, its a feeling of being raped. I couldn’t even sit in my van or even touch it. This is just so sad for me.
In my mind, I was making all kinds of “movies” about what I could do to those GOONS. This morning when I woke up, those thoughts were the first thing on my mind. Then I thought to myself… LaCrease you can really be mean. Find a way to get rid of the anger. I am still very upset and angry at these guys. I thought I had forgiven them, until I went to see the damage they did to a van that had NO ISSUES.
Another thing I keep thinking about is this: Job 2:6 6 The Lord said to Satan, “Very well, then, he is in your hands; but you must spare his life.”
 
 
The reason why I kept thinking about that was because for a year and 9 months, I’ve been catching it, and that Scripture reminds me that everything Job went though.. it had to pass through the DESK OF GOD FOR APPROVAL. God knew everything Job was going through before he went through it… and he passed. This is why no matter what…… I have to stay strong and know my help is on the way.
 
 
Be Blessed!
 
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

A stage play in Detroit Crees Blog Entry

play

A school friend of mines is putting on another play in April. A must see!!!!!

  • The Lighthouse Theater 8801 Woodward in Detroit Mi,48202

  • This dramatic and very inspirational stage play will have you on the edge of your seat,its twist and turns will keep you guessing on how it will really ends..”Flawed Beautiful People”..What are you hiding in your closet??

    you get three chances to see this well-written play Friday April 4th-8pm and April 5th Saturday 2pm and 8pm

    Vip is $35 which includes,champagne, a wrist band, appetizers and the first 2rows ONLY at the 8pm shows with assign SECURITY and USHERS!!! fri 8pm.$20 Sat.2pm $20 and 8pm $25 for gen adm.

    FREE PARKING!! Tickets go on sale February 3rd!

Who R U LaCrease? Part 4 *final* Cree’s Blog Entry @tylerperry

keeping my mouth shutPART 4……..    But in order to do that… I had to ask God…where did this come from? Lord, why do I get upset when someone is sharing with me a story about what someone else did to them? Why do I take it to heart so deeply? Why am I so emotionally connected to their story? Why are my insides on fire as they tell the story? Why do I even care?
I was fed up with my own behavior of trying to “fight” everyday with people about how they treat others. So, I sat down with the TV off and started asking God why am I this way? There has to be a root, where did this begin? All of a sudden I started thinking about my childhood. I was bullied in school. I was bullied because I was different and did my own thing. I admire people who do their “own thing” and not what others did….. unless they like it. If you don’t like what I do, that you wouldn’t do… don’t comment on MY stuff. My dad knew I was different too. I feel to this day that he was a major part of why I have a thing against bullies. For example. Say for instance our light bill was due tomorrow. My dad would spend the money, have fun with it, and worry about that when…. the shut off FINAL NOTICE came. Me, on the other hand, if I had a shut off notice, I would pay the bill, so that I could have PEACE, and not be in the middle of a conversation with someone laughing it up, then all of a sudden …. I THINK OF THIS LIGHT BILL THAT’S GOING TO BE SHUT OFF AT ANY MOMENT. In my daddy’s eyes, I would be considered “silly” in a BULLY FORM OF WAY for thinking like this, and for worrying way to much about it. That always bothered me. It made me feel like this…. If I did things or think things differently than you, mines is considered “STUPID” but yours is considered “SMART”. In my eyes that’s a form of “bullying”.
So, as I got older and realized that the gurl who always stayed in the house, people loved me for how different I was. I was NEVER popular in school, but when I started working and living on my own, people connected with me in a HUGE WAY. Because I was different. I stuck up for the “under dogs”. If I saw you messing with someone and they looked like they didn’t want to be apart… I would say something in a nice tone, and let you know… “we don’t do that here”. I felt that I was that voice for them, but it came from my own place when I was a child.
Then God reminded me of a time when a coworker came to me and said Cree I have something to tell you, but I have to tell you when I call you later, because I know you’re going to be mad. That right there, sent my gauge up to 100. LOL I begged her to tell me now, but she didn’t. When she told me the story later, yep I was mad.. ON FIYAH. Long story short. Me and that coworker was standing around waiting for customers, when our boss son came in. He was good looking, 4 years younger than my daughter. When my boss introduced us to him, we said “oh he’s handsome a good looking guy’… and that was the end of that. Didn’t this BOSS/MANAGER go and tell the other MANAGERS that we were all over her son, and that we were acting like “cougars”, and she also said, women like us is the reason why he don’t come up to the job. PISSED ME OFF. First of all, the lil short sawed off rut…. didn’t look like much, second of all, we both have kids who are GROWN and OLDER THAN HIM, and third of all…. we like men in their late 40’s early 50’s. WHAT?????????? So since I’m faithful to my word and friend about not mentioning anything. We both speak to the Manager, but we keep it moving….we don’t deal with her like that.
Then God bought to my remembrance about how I take up for Tyler Perry when people talk bad about him. I connect with Tyler because we share a lot of child hood issues. I love him as a brother, and a long time ago I adopted in my mind that he is just like me. People talk about him because he’s different, he do things his own way. I LOVE and ADMIRE that about him. When I take up for him, I see us as kids, and since I’m older than him. I see myself as the big sister. And NOBODY is going to talk about MY BROTHER!!! I never shared this with anyone, but when I use to read my google alerts on him and the article was bad and the comments were even worst. I would get on there and SHUT THE WHOLE BOARD DOWN… I would nut up on anyone who had anything negative to say about him. Again it goes back to my child hood, its a form of BULLYING in my mind.
One day I came across this page and this white lady was talking about Tyler, I sent her a email and this is how it went.
RE: Backstage
I am a faithful fan of Tyler Perry. As I read your post about him and read your sarcasm….. I was upset to see that you were taking shots at him. For NO reason. If you’re going to write about a story…. WRITE IT. Leave your remarks out.
But then I realized it was YOU…. who looked stupid. Lindsey had a daughter NOT a son. Trying to make Tyler look bad, you need to be FIRED. Get it together PROFESSIONAL writer.
Then she sent this back to me: Hi lacrease,My name is * took her name out* I’m sorry if my post about the Tyler Perry Foundation offended you. Until your comment I didn’t know there actually was such an organization.I’ve taken the liberty of changing the name and removing the Tyler Perry Foundation from the post but the post itself remains.I’m not against people with GID or those who opt for sexual reassignment surgery. It wasn’t my intention to offend you but I’m sorry if I did.Regards,
After doing this…. I decided that I cannot fight these BULLIES, if Tyler Perry can keep it moving, than so can I. This is what God has been showing me for the longest about myself. I’m the same way with HOMELESS people. Don’t let me hear someone talking down on them, I will have a fit. Don’t talk about anyone who is less fortunate. Don’t mis treat kids, BECAUSE THEY DO KIDS STUFF….another issue that God should me. My coworker stopped me from what I was doing and asked me to come over to her, because she had something to tell me. When I got to her, she asked me….. WHY DO YOU GIVE THESE KIDS MONEY? PISSED ME OFF. My heat Gauge went to 100. Before I knew it I started nutting up, no curse words, or loud talking… NONE OF THAT…. I basically told her that I was grown, I do what I want with my money, and that you have NO IDEA of how many people gave me money as a child and adult, and this is my pay off. That was truly the day, she became my “friend”. She got me…. she knew then that I was my OWN WOMAN in my OWN LANE, doing my OWN THING, with my OWN MIND….
Since God showed me these things about myself. I’m learning to kinda emotionally disconnect from the people I love so much. I love my family and friends. I get to tied into their story and take it to heart. I ‘ve been doing sooooo good lately. God reminds me when I’m in the middle of a test, so that I can think about it as its happening, and to pay attention to my “heat gauge”. LOL I can listen to a story and not be so quick to get upset, or offer my “opinion” about it so quickly. I realize that God is in control and that I don’t have to “mentally fight” off bullies, and take up for the underdog, or hear a story and get upset about it, because its a LIE, MEAN, BULLYISH, or GOSSIP. I’m learning to “keep it moving”. I don’t have to take up for my Brother Tyler Perry who I LOVE so dearly anymore. He can handle his own affairs, and people are going to say what they want about him and everybody else too. I have gotten emails and DM from people who ask me…. do you see Tyler Perry for your husband? LOL I laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh at them, I can see no further than me and he as kids, being different and trying to make it. I couldn’t understand it myself, until God should me the connection.
 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/31/syleena-johnson-iyanla-vanzant_n_3677969.html I was watching Fix My Life with Syleena Johnson and when she asked why she still feels this way about her mom Iyanla replied :”because when you were a little person the big people were behaving badly… and then you grow up…. but you never shifted your relationship with those big people… so in your life she’s still a big person bullying you… and your response is that of a 4 year old… you ever learned how else to be. THAT WAS MY BREAKTHROUGH……THAT WAS THE MOMENT I GOT IT…. I AM A GROWN WOMAN… FIGHTING AS A CHILD IN MY ADULT MIND AND LIFE. TELL ME SOMEBODY GOT THAT? That video is ME FROM THE BEGINNING TO THE END! ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME. THIS WAS MY BREAKTHROUGH.
Everyday there is a test for me…. I have to be open at all times for the warning…. hey maybe there will be times when God doesn’t warn me. LOL I know him…. there will be those times. But the bigger picture here is that I WANT to be a better person, and yes I love my family and friends, but I have to emotionally disconnect from the issues, not to make it mines, to not take on the emotionally responsibility of fixing the issue. But at the same time continue to help them out in anyway I can, * I love talking to people* but not to make it mines.
Thanks for reading, and please learn from MY Life Lessons.
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

DEEP ROOTED ISSUES….. *Cree’s Blog*

I guess today was a day of Blessings…. done another way by God. It was only when I sat down today at work at the Credit Card booth, I was able to be quiet and see the whole picture in a BLESSING light.

I walked into work this morning 9 am. Everyday, as I’m walking through the front end to get to the back to punch the clock. I’ll walk pass the front registers tap on the bag holder and speak to the cashier…….. even if they have a customer I’ll say…….. Good Morning… Ms. Shirley and to the customer, I’ll go to the next register and say Good Morning Ms. Chris.. and also to the customer with a smile…. I’ll go all around the front and for the back registers…. I’ll just call out their names * the cashiers* and say Good Morning. EVERYDAY. Now, I’m the kinda person who “stays in my own lane” if you don’t do that……… THAT’S FINE WITH CREE…. OKAY COOL.,…. but as for ME this is who I am……even before WALMART. I try to make every encounter PERSONAL. First of all, its a ATMOSPHERE SETTER…. 2nd.. it lets people know I come in PEACE…. 3rd… ITS FREE AND YOU DON’T PAY TAXES ON SAYING GOOD MORNING OR HELLO. 🙂


SO……………..*SIGH* as I’m making my rounds. I CAME to this one lady who is about my age………..white . I say Good Morning Ms. *her name*. She didn’t speak….. * she always half speak* but this time, I said…I said Hello Ms. *her name*, she says…….. I’m quiet today… and turned her head. I said you’re quiet today? I says to her, so you can’t speak… she says well… I’m being quiet today. I looked at her like a parent to a 6 year old, and I said to her….. in my DIRECT EYE CONTACT…  EYE SQUINTING…… LOWEST TO THE POINT ….VOICE …. you mean to tell me that you can’t say Good Morning because you’re being quiet? Then she says … Good Morning LaCrease………. there’s a lot on my mind. I said okay…. everybody IN HERE has A LOT ON THEIR MINDS. I guess the way I stepped to her, made her just say it. I was ticked off and I’ll tell you why.

About 6 months ago, this SAME lady came to our store, she was new. I welcomed her, and everything. She’s a very quiet woman, very STONED FACED, and VERY COLD looking. All day everyday she shows NO EMOTION…. she’s a woe is me person, and people are fed up with it. Except me…. I’m always trying to talk to her and be her friend seeing that she looks at me as a “popular person”. But she always wants to play the victim. I can’t feel her on that. I saw this in her, but by me being a Christian…. I can see and understand that she has DEEP ROOTED ISSUES. I love talking to people like her, because usually I can help them come to see WHATS REALLY BOTHERING THEM..But the next person…… they aint trying to hear or understand where she’s coming from. But I’m different. One day she was telling me some very DEEP DEEP DEEP things about her, that I WILL NEVER IN MY LIFE AS LONG AS I LIVE SHARE WITH ANYONE. I felt then she knew that I would be a person she could trust. So, I know first hand how deep her issues go. I also knew that one day she would turn on me too, she doesn’t mean to be this way…. but at the same time she doesn’t know any other way. And even though in all the months she has worked there,  besides that talk….we have never said 4 words to each other in a WHOLE DAY.

So, going back to when I spoke to her as I always do everyday… after we had that small back and forth… I went to punch in. I admit walking to the time clock, it did kinda bother me. It bothered me because I was the person she talked deeply with one day, and here she is doing me like she did the others. So, after I punched in she came to me, and said can I talk to you? I said Yes. She says to me… YOU HURT MY FEELINGS….. I SAID NOOOOOO YOU HURT MY FEELINGS!!!!!! She said you said all of that to me in front of those people, I said you DIDN’T SPEAK TO ME IN FRONT OF THOSE SAME PEOPLE….*they didn’t even hear it… I asked them*. I said .. I speak to everyone when I come in everyday to work, she says I know LaCrease…. I’ve spoken back to you in the PAST as well. I said OKAY AND………TODAY IS A NEW DAY MS *HER NAME*.. Then she said…. there’s a lot on my mind…and I said….. and there’s a lot on EVERYBODY’S mind, but you still can speak to me and people around you. I said we’re in customer service, we HAVE TO BE FRIENDLY… She said I know I’m not friendly, and I’ve asked to be moved to another area, but in the meantime I’m working on being a people person.  I asked her… well is this the job for you?

The point I’m making in this BLOG is this. We all go through something, have things on our minds, have issues, have bills to pay, have things to do. WE ALL DO! But there is NO DEDUCTION FROM YOUR CHECK A WEEK OR BIWEEKLY when you SPEAK TO FOLKS. Stop with that WOE IS ME MENTALITY. I cry and have feelings for a lot of things and issues people go through… but that WOE IS ME……….. I WILLL NEVERRRRRRRR GIVE ATTENTION TO. NEVERRR EVER. People like her….., walk around stone faced, looking for someone to “baby their issues” those people walk into a room and bring SHADE with them. No light at all lives in them. Some enjoy this type of behavior. Because its always someone there to empathize / sympathize with them. I’m not her.

She came to me to tell me that “I hurt her feelings”, and when I mirrored it back to her, she was shocked. LOL She told me that I was one of the “popular gurls” and that she’s quiet. Okay andddddd what does that have to do with SPEAKING TO SOMEONE? But see I know she said that in a way as if to say….. you’re strong, and I’m not so strong… so if I say YOU HURT MY FEELINGS, then the story can stay on her and how hurt she was. WRONG PERSON to do that with, because even though she did hurt my feelings, I had to let her know she did, then I went on to express how I felt. This caused her to walk away NOT being the victim….. but the person who CAUSED THE HURT. She didn’t like that one bit.

WOW RIGHT? Well, these are the people I love to help to see this pattern of themselves. She never smiles, she never speaks, she gets so many customer complaints that if she gets in trouble one more time, she’s fired. Let me tell you how this saddens me. She will leave this job eventually……. go to another job and adopt this same behavior. She needs to learn and understand that she has to get help concerning the things that happened in her life. This is NOT HER FAULT… and certainly NOT EVERYONE WHO SHE COMES IN CONTACT WITH. She carries this hurt with her, you can see each one of them on her face. She gets by in life by creating an atmosphere and making herself the center of it. She does this by saying how she’s been hurt. But HER REAL issue is still unsolved. I feel so bad for her, because she feels that this is the life she’s dealt and instead of taking that to heart, she uses it to create situations that allows herself to be the victim…. instead of using it to empower herself.

Will I speak to her tomorrow? YES YES YES YES YES, Because I KNOW…. that I’m not her REAL issue…. she’s simply in her own way.

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy