Tag: me

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Sail On My Friend/BLOG

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Hey Family!

I know its been a while since I’ve written anything here. But I lost my MALE BEST FRIEND to a trucking accident. He was a local truck driver. He’s been since I met him over 22 years ago. He loved to drive state to state for 2-3 weeks at a time, but since he started having grand children he wanted to be home more to spend time with them, so he changed his shift to locally.

January 10, 2019, My sister called me. I was taking a nap. I saw that it was her and answered the phone. She asked me if I had seen anything on FB about my BFF Rodney dying in a trucking accident. I sat straight up in bed as my heart started beating fast, I told her No. She told me to get on line, and go to our brother ex wife page. It read RIP Rodney Adams, and I was SHOCKED!!! I was mad at her for posting it, I wanted her to take it down. I was in denial and didn’t want to believe it. I asked her where did she hear that from? She told me from someone she knew. So, I went to his mom’s page, his daughter, sons, BFF, his siblings and NOTHING. No one had said a word. I couldn’t cry because I didn’t believe it. Not MY BEST FRIEND!

As the night went on I was glued to all of their FB pages and finally his sister posted. I was devastated. I knew it was true then. Still I couldn’t cry because I had just spoken with him less than 2 weeks before. We worked different shifts and when we talked over the phone.. WE TALKED!!!!!. He always made me laugh with his stories. I use to call him just so that he could make me laugh.

I can’t believe that I wont see my friend anymore. His BFF Mike for over 45 years was calling him to say that his MOTHER had passed away, just to find out the HE (((Rodney)))  had too on the SAME DAY.

There was a HUMAN WASTE spill on I-75 that was backed up for miles and miles and miles. After “cleaning up” the right lane only ((( they were STILL cleaning up the other lanes))) they had to open it up to release the traffic. Well…. all of the waste along that right lane wasn’t completely gotten up. A trailer truck carrying a camper slid in the right lane on the waste  leaving part of the camper hanging out of the right lane. He got over as much as he could from on coming traffic. Then Rodney comes along driving his truck, SLID in the waste as well and slammed right into the back of the man and his trailer. The driver was okay had a few injuries. The family said the first responders prayed with Rodney as he was pinned to his truck. He was in and out, after the prayer they told the family that he complained of his legs hurting. As soon as the jaws of life pulled him out, he died INSTANTLY.

The days after as it sunk in, I have crying spells daily. Even to this day. I think about him calling me all the time as he drove.

His family put him away beautifully.  I miss my silly friend. He loved people, and LOVED HIS FAMILY. They said that so many times at his service, how he loved his Facetime LIVES, his family, especially his grandkids, family barbecues, Prince and his Superfriends. They are made up about 7-8 friends who went to high school together.

One thing I am grateful for…. his relationship with God. He LOVED GOD. They had the best relationship I can say this myself. I can’t wait to see him again.

Here is a song that his sister and her husband sung at his service. It happens to be one of my favorite songs from a CD I purchased years and years ago.

Rest Rodney. I love you.

Cree

LoveMeForever Medium

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My Birthday/BLOG

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Hey Family!

My Birthday was Sep 3 and I turned 51! Wow Thank you Jesus. I remember when I was younger saying how old 50 was. Now that I’m that age, I am NOT old… I AM STILL YOUNG AND LEARNING! This is the age where you just start to LIVE! And I really mean that.

You come to a place and time in your life where you know what’s important, who is for you. You watch what you say and do because at this age you don’t want to pay for any silly immature consequences. You are slow to speak, and LOVE to keep quiet and just watch it go down ((( cause aint nothing you can do about it anyway))). This is the age where you want more of God, less of the world and more PEACE. You don’t want to fall out with anyone,  I’m not mad at anyone, want to argue and debate, just  go to work, come home and enjoy the rest of my days in PEACE AND LOVE. This is where I am in my life.

Now look, I have one child. My daughter was born on my Birthday Sep 3. She turned 32. So, a week before our birthday she told me that she was taking me out to dinner along with her boyfriend. I was happy and couldn’t wait for the day.

That day came and I was talking to my mother on the phone, I had planned to go see her (( she lives directly around the corner from me)) and then when it was time to go to dinner, I could leave from her place. She told me that she wanted to going with us, but felt that me and my daughter should go. Then she said, well, I’m going to get off this phone and lay down for a few. I told her okay, well I’ll see her the next day for my birthday.

Not long after that, my daughter texted me and asked me did I mind of grandma and granddad go with us, and if I could pick them up. I was excited because I knew my mom wanted to go. My dad even said he would go. I called my mom and she said that my daughter asked them to go with us. I was happy. I love my family because we always get together. Then, I jumped on the phone and called my Sister Peedie and ask her what she and her husband doing? She said they had just finished eating pizza and that they were relaxing for the evening. I said okay, well talk to you later.

Time came to pick up my parents and we were on our way. My daughter called me as we were driving to say,  stay in the car until we pull up so that we could be seated together. Okay cool. She and her boyfriend arrived and we all got out the car. As my daughter opened the door for us (( somehow I was first, I’m usually last especially with my parents)) which leads to the first sitting area, I walked in and my whole family was sitting there smiling and looking at me. Took me a second to realize what and who I was seeing.

There WAS MY SISTER PEEDIE, HER HUSBAND, MY NIECES THEIR BOYFRIENDS, MY NEPHEWS, MY BROTHER HIS GIRLFRIEND I WAS SO SHOCKED AND OUT DONE Plus my parents, my daughter and her boyfriend, 16 of us. They planned this for a month!!! I remember just staring at my sister Peedie cause she just told me on the phone that she had dinner and was relaxing for the day.  Took me a second to realize that she was actually there. I had tears in my eyes to see MY FAMILY!! My daughter got me good. They all got hugs and kisses and my sneaky daughter I’m going to get her! And lots of MONEY AND GIFTS!!! That was truly amazing what my daughter did for me, and its her Birthday too! WE sat down together had dinner, drinks, and lots of laughs. Thank you Jesus for my family. I truly appreciate it and enjoyed myself.

Well, I’m down to my last 2 days of my 10 day vacation! I had a good time. I went to dinner, to the movies, hung out at the park talking to my sister and relaxing on the Detroit River several days, went to my first NFL game to see The Detroit Lions play LIVE and had FRONT ROW SEATS, washed clothes, cleaned up, relaxed, shopping tomorrow and to the DETROIT RIVER, then back to work on Friday!

Thank you Lord for another YEAR

Komika Slick

 

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Thinking Out Loud/BLOG

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Sometimes when you’re in a relationship, and things aren’t going well, its so easy to point the finger at the other person to find fault with them. But I challenge you to get in a quiet place and ask God to reveal the things that are YOUR fault.

The things that you allow in a relationship cause for the person to react to that choice. What is YOUR role in a failed relationship?

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Learn From My Words/BLOG

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Being a writer… you have to be careful of how you word things…

My Momma always told me, that my mouth was going to get me in trouble someday

Sometimes I come off too strong and offend others

I NEVER EVER EVER curse people out, but I can put together a def defying sentence

 

 

Only God can get me out of this one

Chopin Script Regular

 

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Virgo Women/BLOG

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One of my popular post here in my blog is the one I posted on VIRGO MEN. But I wanted to do something on VIRGO WOMEN and just so happens… I’m one MYSELF.

I’m going to give you a BALANCED post by sharing in each paragraph the beautiful and the ugly about us VIRGOS.

Virgo WOMEN……. are some CRAZY, FUN LOVING, LAUGHING, GOOD TIME HAVING, PEOPLE. We love to laugh and surround ourselves with loving people. At work, my coworkers say they can hear me laughing all over the building. I’ve always laughed loud, because it hits me in my mind first, then it carries out to my mouth. Virgo women are those that walk up in a gathering, and THEN THE PARTY STARTS!!!!

VIRGO WOMEN……..ARE VERY very very VERY territorial about our kids, family and friends. We don’t play when it comes to them at ALL. If my momma is not answering her phone. She knows I’m going to BLOW HER PHONE OUT OF HER PURSE. She knows this. She knows I’m that CRAZY child that will jump in my car, and be on my way to kick her door in. LOL  To make sure she’s not dead or cant get to her phone. She knows this about me. My dad the same way, don’t let me call him and he’s not answering his cellphone. They know I’m crazy like that, so she will let me know where she’s going ahead of time so I won’t worry, and I have all the places she goes on SPEED DIAL… and she knows if she doesn’t answer…. I’M ON MY WAY!!! My daughter the same way. We both have iPhones, when she’s out and about (( sometimes)) (( Me: rolls my eyes)) she’ll send me her location. Most times she’s with her boy friend so I’m good with that, because he’s good people and he KNOWS me and her dad DON’T PLAY when it comes to her. But one time we were suppose to go someplace and she wasn’t answering her phone early in the morning.. Baaaaby… I put my shoes on, jumped in my car and I was at her apartment in seconds (( she lives just around the corner from me)). I stuck my key in her door and she jumped up out of her sleep. She knew then, that momma don’t play and she betta answer the phone. LOL LOL This is why Virgo Women don’t mess with people’s kids, we stay in our lane. That’s because we don’t want anyone to mess with ours.

VIRGO WOMEN…..are LOYAL. We LOVE our friends. We will tell them the truth and not sugar coat anything. Over the years, I had to learn how to be truthful but at the same time, say it in a way that it won’t offend the person. Most people can handle the truth, but it has to be spoken in a gentle way, and sometimes when we want people to really get it, we can say things rough. But, we don’t mean that you are dumb or stupid, we ‘re just passionate about you getting what we are bringing to you.  We won’t stand for anyone to talk about our friends. We feel that if you have something negative to say about my friend, then go tell if to YOUR friends. We are not the people you bad mouth our friend to. We don’t play that. One thing about us tho, if we find out that you have been DISLOYAL all the time with us, using things we told you against us, USING us, talking behind our backs about us, WE WILL CUT YOU OFF LIKE A DEAD TREE IN THE GROUND!!! We won’t have ANYTHING to say to you ever. If you keep sending us emails, calling our phones and leaving messages and we don’t respond.. LET IT GO. We are done. It makes us madder and madder, please believe we are sitting back thinking of ways to chop your whole body up, and package it in a fingernail polish bottle to send to …….. you fill in the blank. But then of course, we feel bad, and ask God to forgive us for those  CRAZY thoughts and get back to our lives. We just want PEACE!

VIRGO WOMEN… Love to communicate. We have to make sure that we know exactly what is going on in order to do things correctly. I may ask you 100 questions, because I want to get things right. I want direct details. We are some investigators too. You can’t just tell a Virgo woman anything. We’ll get to the bottom of the truth no matter how long it takes. We know people in high places and we will use all of our resources. I remember I was dating this guy we were very close. One day I woke up in the middle of the night and had a feeling that he was out doing something he had no business doing. I jumped in my car about 3-4 in the morning and went to the areas I know he goes to all the time, and saw his car in the drive way of someone he had been with previously. We were done as a couple. But the point I’m making is, we will do our  homework based off what we are feeling and what we may know. It will KILL  a Virgo woman to not act upon her intuition. If Im new at a job and you are the person that comes to me and tell me everything about everyone in the building… Im side eyeing you FIRST. VIRGO women like to get to know people for ourselves. You cant tell us about other people. NOW.. WE WILL KEEP EVERYTHING YOU SAID IN OUR MINDS… WE TAKE MENTAL NOTES ON EVERYTHING….. because we may need it later. Because when we realize that person was right, we have all the first hand information stored in our minds, and we WILL DISCONNECT FROM THAT PERSON ON SITE!

Virgo women.. well some. Don’t like to go through people’s private things. I just can’t. Its about privacy to me. I was dating this therapist years ago, I met him because I use to clean his office building. When he was gone, I loved going up in his room and snooping through his drawers, desk and other things. I couldn’t wait to find something new, so that I could bring it up the next day. Boy was that ignorant and silly. I don’t care whats in his office, room, phone, home…. just as long as we’re good.. Im fine. NOW……. If some information come to me.. that’s when the VIRGO WOMAN HAS TO INVESTIGATE….. and trust meeeeeeeeeee.. WE INVESTIGATE LOL Imma leave this right there! LOL

VIRGO WOMEN… Work!!! I never complain at my job. I do my work and do it well. My bosses loves me and I love them. I don’t give them any lip, any talk back, I don’t disrespect them, or curse in front of them even if they are comfortable saying a curse word in front of me. When a VIRGO woman is not feeling it, she wont go to work and spread her irritated atmosphere, she will stay home and get herself together. We work hard!!! Once a VIRGO WOMAN know her job description, she will run the business like its hers. VIRGO WOMEN cant stand complaining, whinny people. It irritates our souls to hear about aches and pains when that person can be in bed. Virgo women hate complaints!!!! We cant stop whoa is me type of people. I tell people to BOSS UP!!! When we work with people who complain, it messes up the whole atmosphere. We cant stand tell a tells. We believe in going to the person  and having a smiley face talk with them, after that.. WE DON’T DEAL WITH YOU ANYMORE. To a Virgo you are INVISIBLE…. NOT EVEN HERE., NOT EVEN BORN, NOT EVEN KNOWN. WE ARE DONE!

Chopin Script Regular

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Took Me Long Enough.. But I Got It!/BLOG

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As long as I can remember I was ALWAYS that little girl that felt that if me and my family was going to the park, why not ask if my friend Michelle could go. Not knowing that it was family day. Meaning that my parents only wanted our family to go, and that was it.

For the life of me, I couldn’t UNDERSTAND why my friend couldn’t go to join in on the fun. I thought…. all we were doing was going to the park to swing and play! That never made sense to me. As a child, I didn’t realize that parents have a reason for doing what they did. Maybe they didn’t have the extra money to buy her snacks, maybe they had just enough just for us. Maybe it wasn’t enough room for her in the car, because they were picking up groceries on the way home. Maybe, we were going out to dinner afterwards and there was only enough money for our family. No matter how my parents explained that to my little mind, I still couldn’t understand why my friend couldn’t go.

Which takes me into my ADULTHOOD.

I know, I know a lot of people, and that my personality is big. I get that about myself.  I remember this one time, me and my friend Gloria was going to the movies and out to dinner. I hung up with her after making our plans, to call a few OTHER friends and invite them to go with us. In MY mind, I felt…. Well, they wanted to see this same movie, why not invite them. So, when we got there, Gloria asked me….. who invited them? Even though she knew them, and liked them, she just wanted it to be HER AND I. I couldn’t understand that. In MY mind…. (( going back to that little gurl)) I felt that if we all wanted to see the SAME movie, why not invite them? I did that to my friend so many times that it saddens me to this day. It saddens me because I didn’t get it. I didn’t get the fact that everything is not for everyone. Its OK, if she only wanted to be with ME. She wasn’t being selfish, like I thought. Its a time for a few, and its a time for all. I couldn’t get that. 

Thinking back I DID that quite often. Not only that. But I trust people too easily. Again, growing up we lived in a house where if you laid something down, it was there when you went back to it. We were taught, if we go visit someone, and they have money or anything that DIDN’T BELONG to us, laying around.. DO NOT TOUCH IT! DON’T GO NEAR IT! So, when I was grown and moved out. I lived by those standards. But what I didn’t know was that not everyone was taught that. Man, I had so many things to learn that was taught differently in my home. I had a hard time adjusting to how things were in the world versus how I was raised. I feel like crying right now….. tears.

I got hurt so many times trusting people. Believing that everybody was good. Picking up strangers on the way to where I’m GOING… got side tracked several years. Sent me spinning. I should have been to where I was going.

My mentality WAS that if I’m going to the same place you’re going… “lets hop a cab and split it”..  ((( in my Andre 3000 voice.. John Legend -Green Light))) never knowing that it was okay to pay the whole fare BY MYSELF!  I don’t need to ride with you. And I’ll still be good!

I realize that where I’m going, everybody can’t go. Same for others, I can’t go everywhere with them either.  Even if we’re going the same way, you have to take your own car. You can’t ride with me, because just like my friend Gloria where ever I’m going they may just want it to be me and them. I learned that you can’t tell everybody everything, because in the pureness if me telling my story from my heart, my same story will be heard differently by someone else. I had to learn that too. But you know, that will NEVER happen to me again. What I know.. I know.. My friend is MY friend, Where God wants me to go.. I’m going alone.

I’ve lost too much time, messing around with people who don’t mean me any good.. And oh, I know how to fall back. I just didn’t know if I should.

That Chapter is OVER FOR ME….. I’M ready to RECEIVE LORD!

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Chopin Script Regular

 

 

 

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God Told Me That I Was Getting In The Way With My Foolishness- PT 2/BLOG

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The following year, my daughter entered High School. She had a good 4 years, graduated, then decided that she would take a year off from school. That didn’t sit well with me at all. I wanted her to go straight to college because I know sometimes when kids take a year off, its hard to get back into the grove. But my baby was determined to go to college. She told me that she was tired, and that she really needed that time off.  I respect that, she broke it down and I got it. I didn’t want her to start a job either, because I KNEW that if she started working, it was a chance that she would get use to the money and never start college. That was happening to so many kids at the time. I made sure she didn’t need for anything.

Often times Nesha  and I would talk about that night God told me that I was getting in the way with my foolishness of who she was going to be. I was very conscience of everything I did, said, and exposed her to.  As I’m watching her grow up, I’m watching GOD work in her life. I’m watching every step of the way with excitement in my heart… asking just what is HE using my baby for? We both wanted to see where God was leading her, and sometimes its not what WE  have in PLAN.

On her way to an Event for her job

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She traveled in the summer with her dad, and when Fall came around she was ready for College. She wanted to become a Lawyer, so she went to school, did 4 years, and received her Bachelors in Criminal Justice. In her last year she went to work for the 36 District Courts here in Detroit where she worked in Forfeiture. She wanted to learn as much as she  could, so she sat with Judges, Criminal Prosecutors, and Defense Lawyers.  She also sat in the court room for every hearing of our former Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick.  It was a joy to see her on TV everyday.  Knowing in my heart how she felt about being in the presence of a court room and getting a feel of what she wanted to do. She was so well liked and known around the building for her ambition to learn. Several Judges wanted her to leave her department to work for them. She did. But as time passed, she started seeing in the court room how things were done and had a burning desire to help Women, Seniors and Children. She felt as if her need was elsewhere at that time, other than in the court room.

During that time, she helped me to put together The Feeding The Homeless Projects, and also my Youth Group Raisingurls To Women in my home. She enjoyed it and was a big help, more than I could ever explain.

She would always say Momma, I’ll go back to school later to become a Lawyer, but  right now I want to work with Youth and Family Services. I said baby…. this is YOUR LIFE…. you do what you are LEAD to do. She said I just dont want you to be disappointed. I told her NEVER THAT…. I’m just watching God do his work in you, I have raised you, you’re an adult now, you have your own relationship with God, you do what you want to do in life. With my Blessings (( in her heart)) she started working for a Non-Profit Organization. And when I tell you this gurl is doing her thing. I don’t have enough time to share it all. She went right in (( first job)) in 2012 worked her behind off, that THE CEO made her DIRECTOR OF FAMILY GROWTH AND DEVELOPMENT !  Yess!!!!  She’s the Supervisor of 6 Clinicians . And I’m looking at God like…… Are you serious? You’re having me to witness all of this? And I’m so happy that he allowed me to share with her that night at 12 years old, that it was all about her. My foolishness had to end, so that I could focus on her, and raise her up, so that she could be used by him. What JOY I FEEL AS I WRITE THIS. THANK YOU JESUS, THANK YOU LORD.

Photo of her at 4 years old

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I don’t get a chance to see her work in person, and I have to make her tell me stories about what she does. She believes in helping others and not so much talking about it. But for me, its about seeing what God was talking about. Thanking him for getting me together so that I could raise her properly. So she shares some. But last week, I got to see for myself. We had planned to do a little shopping and get something to eat after she was done at work. She told me to pick her up at 5:00 but someone called and needed food and personal items because she didn’t have anything to feed her son. I told her that I would be there EARLY anyway (( I wanted to see the person)), the young lady jumped out of the passenger side of the truck and ran in the building. My daughter hand her this huge box full of food and items. It made me cry. This lady hugged my daughter so tight and kept Thanking her. I sat in the car saying to myself God, this is what you were telling me? Seeing my daughter help someone who had NO FOOD FOR HER SON… just did something to me. I thought my daughter would be putting criminals in jail, she’s putting food on the table for those we are in need. It made me cry, seeing this in person. She was just 12 years old, here she is 30 and I’m just in awe of God.

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This week she started school again!!!! She wants to go higher in her field. She wants to be a Therapist, its funny because they say Criminal Justice cross paths with it, so now to her it make sense why she switched off from wanting to be a Lawyer. Her boss told her, go to school….. bring me the bill! Wow amazing!  

When I tell you my daughter takes care of me…… it brings tears to my eyes. The gifts, the thoughts, the appreciation is over whelming sometimes. Because all I wanted was for her do what SHE wanted to do, and for me to see WHAT IS ALL THIS GOD WAS TALKING ABOUT. I SEE IT FOR MYSELF… Never in a million years when I did my Feeding The Homeless Projects  that she was watching in the background. Never knew that what she was helping me with… SHE RUNS AND DIRECTS. Below is her being honored here in Detroit by city officials, and other members and staff personal all over the city. It blew my mind to hear all of these kind words, and to REMEMBER WHAT GOD REVEALED TO ME THAT NIGHT!  And there is so much to come, and if The Lord say the same.. He’ll let me be here to SEE IT! AMEN!

ALSO, A Happy Happy Birthday to HER today (( 31)) September 3.. and I turned 50 TODAY AS WELL!

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God Told Me That I was Getting In The Way With My Foolishness PT 1/BLOG

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I was in my early 30’s when I was temporary SHUT DOWN ..by God.

Growing up we would have our water, lights and gas shut off and then turned back on, and I hated that. I said that when I “got grown” I’m going to make sure that I pay my bills off once it comes in the mail. And I made good on that promise. All my adult life, I hated to “pay” on a bill because it would catch up with the next month, and seem like it would be double. All my friends use to ask me why not just pay on it, but they didn’t know  the promise I made to myself and why once I was grown. Still till this day, I do NOT pay on my bill, I pay it off COMPLETELY.

One day, my car went down, I had to get a ride to work with my co-workers. Then right after that, we all lost our jobs due to selling of the plant we worked. So, that meant if I didn’t find work soon, my  home services would be cut off. Well, even though my cable was still on, my lights and gas went off because they were on the same electric company. Oh, I was DEVASTATED! I had NEVER in my adult life experienced all of my services being disconnected at the same time. It was cold outside and I couldn’t let my daughter stay in the house with me, so I took her to my parents house and let her stay over there until I heard from God.

I knew he wanted my attention. I have a relationship with him and I KNOW when he needs to speak to me. He knew how I paid my bills, he knew that if everything was turned off, that he would get my attention. He knew how to shut me down, and I KNEW he wanted to speak to me. I lost my job, so I got up in the daytime when it was warm to call around for job openings, and at night I would lay down to think and try to hear from him. My daughter missed her daily routine of how we did things at home and even though she enjoyed being with my parents, she started doing bad in school. I didn’t know it at the time, but I knew her behavior had changed and I didn’t like it one bit.

Nights turned into weeks, and still no word from God. I remember asking people who I knew could help me get my services turned back on, and they turned me down. I was SO MAD AT THEM. I remember writing it all down, so that I would never forget it. Weeks turned into a month and even though it was warming up outside, It was still cold at night, and I had not heard from God.  I wanted to hear from him to see what this was all about so that I could get back to my normal life. What was my normal life? Well, let me share.

There was a time  when it was all about me and my daughter, we would go to the movies weekly, go shopping, out to dinner all the time. Her dad took her to Disney World- Universal Studios- Island of Adventure, and I took her twice… yes a total of 3 times as a child. Her cousins would come over and spend the night, and she would go over to their house. By the time she was 13 years old, she had been to New York, New Jersey, Atlanta, Philadelphia, Chicago, Cincinnati, Florida…  several times with her dad. She loved to travel.

We slowed down going to the movies,  Church every Sunday,  dinner,  and doing things we were use to doing together. It was only her and I.  I was preoccupied doing other things. I started drinking all the time with my friends, having male friends come over at night when she was sleep, talking on the phone all day.  I was going out every single weekend, making sure I was looking good, going shopping EVERY FRIDAY I got paid…. I was something else. So, when my services were shut off, and I KNEW that paying bills was important to me, this was something bigger than paying bills. This is how God got my attention… I knew it….and I was listening.

Days and weeks went by, turned into a month and I was praying, crying, wondering, scared, thinking… I wanted to know what this was about. Why hasn’t God spoken to me yet? One night I went to my parents house to see my daughter and my dad had been playing the Michigan State Lottery since I was born. Every night when it came on at 7:32 pm… he wanted the house QUIET! NO TALKING. He wanted to see what numbers fell, read what he played, then we could talk. LOL Earlier in the day before I had even got there, I had been seeing this one number straight, like ALL DAY. Everywhere I went I saw this number. It was unreal to me. Well, that night in the lottery it came JUST AS I SAW IT. I got up from the family in TOTAL SHOCK and went into the kitchen alone to ask God why did that number come in the lottery? I said you know I don’t play the lottery, so why did it come? He said to me… I know you don’t play, that was to show you that I haven’t forgotten about you and I’m ready to speak.

I went home alone that night to a cold house, and even though he didn’t speak that night, he spoke the next day.

He said. ” La’Crease, the person that Nesha is going to be.. YOU ARE GETTING IN THE WAY WITH YOUR FOOLISHNESS”. I remember so clearly saying….  Who me? What I do?THIS IS ABOUT NESHA?. NESHA? NESHA?… my daughter? He said YESSS, you’re sleeping with men at night, talking on the phone all day and night, you don’t do anything with her anymore, you have totally neglected her, her grades have suffered. You spend all your time with these men and your friends. He said.. You are getting in the way of who she is going to be with YOUR FOOLISHNESS!!! I felt so bad.  I was so SHOCKED. People ask me how do you know that WAS GOD? I said would I TELL MYSELF THESE THINGS? WILL I SIT THERE AND HEAR MYSELF TELLING MYSELF THIS STUFF? WHO DOES THAT? NOBODY!!! This was not ME saying all this shocking stuff to myself. WHO OVER LOADS THEIR THOUGHTS WITH THEIR OWN SINS? These things were  furthest from my mind.

I started thinking about how true every word was. All I could say is God.. I hear you, I’m about to  change my life!!! He meant it, and it wasn’t talking about next week either… he meant NOW! I was so out done. I was done. I thought all that time he wanted to speak to me about ME, and blessings coming, and new place to live, new car, bills paid, husband.. all this other stuff. LOL LOL  LOL its so funny.. so so sooooo funny NOW.. What a naive person I was. One thang he made clear…… YOU BETTA CHANGE YOUR LIFE AND NOW!

I heard him LOUD AND CLEAR… he didn’t have to repeat himself. I got up that next day, made some phone calls and all my service was turned on in a few days. Help came from everywhere. I went and got my baby from my parents, that’s when I found out that she got F’s on her report card. I was mad a little, because my dad and daughter hid it from me. I promised myself that I would get all her grades up by next report card to A’s and B’s and that’s what I did. My car got fixed, and I got a job. I stopped talking on the phone all together. I HATE talking on the phone, if you know me, you know I hate it to this day! I’ll text, but I dont like talking on the phone and people respect that.

I cut off all my male friends sexually.. 18 years STRONG TODAY… yeaaa I know. But it’s worth it. I started spending all my time with my daughter and I was soo Thankful that God stopped Me from Me. I couldn’t wait to tell her what God had told me, she was waiting to hear it too. When I told her , she was just as shocked as I was. She was only 13 years old when this happened. All she kept saying is momma what am I going to be? I couldn’t answer her. I didn’t know the answer. All I knew was that she wanted to be a Lawyer. I knew that I had a special child. I knew that I had to stop all my foolishness. I knew that God had a plan for her life and I had to STEP ASIDE. I knew that God was serious and that he planned on using her, we just didn’t know how. I straighten all the way up, and its so funny now, she always tease me and say .. “Didn’t God whoop you over me?” LOL LOL WE LAUGH.. WE LAUGH.. WE LAUGH!!!!

Tomorrow, I will share where SHE is 18 years later.… GOD IS TRULY FAITHFUL!

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Life Lesson- Glad I Got A Chance To See Mom Cry/BLOG

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Growing up, I remember so clearly my mother crying many times after hanging up the phone from taking care of business.

My mother was the type to kinda “go with the flow”, when it came to her business over the phone back in the day. If it wasn’t anything immediate she would take what ever they told her, but when it  came to something she needed done now, she didn’t know the right questions to ask, and when she was rejected she’d cry and it would make me so MAD.

Can you imagine how I felt as a child, a person who knew how to express herself, knew what kind of questions I needed to ask in order to get business taking care of and couldn’t help or offend my mother? I hated when she cried. I remember saying, “When I get grown aint nobody gon make me cry”. I think back on this Life Lesson and I’m glad I got a chance to see her cry, because it helped me to learn how to take care of business. It made me strong to where I learned ways to communicate in order to get things done without cursing anyone out. Simply by knowing the right questions to ask.

When I got my first place, I remember thinking, I’m a mother now. I have to make arrangements over the phone, ask the right questions to get my business taken care of. I remember writing down questions I needed to ask before I made my phone calls, and each time they were answered AND UNDERSTOOD by me, I would go on to the next. If I didn’t understand I would ponder that question 3-4 different ways in order to get a true answer. I thought to myself, there is no way in the world that I’m going to hang up this phone and not have made progress. In person….. I’m nothing to toy with. I’m very very friendly and this is why I will not accept anything less than my business being taking care of.

I prefer in person, eye to eye contact. That way a person can understand MY ENERGY, MY PERSISTENCE, MY DIRECTNESS. I never ever ever, ask a person to go beyond the company policy to accommodate me. If you can do it, DO IT. Don’t give me the run a round, because I do ask for names, badge numbers, and phone numbers to your extension just in case I need to ASK MORE QUESTIONS. I’m not a pest, because I don’t want to stay on the subject no more than you do. If I’m speaking with you over the phone and I feel I’m not getting answers… TRUST AND BELIEVE…. I’M ON MY WAY UP THERE TO SEE YOU FACE TO FACE. I will never curse anyone out, and if that person cant/wont help me, then I’ll talk to a supervisor. Even with that, I ONLY talk to people who can get me results. PERIOD.

I watched my mother cry too many times in my childhood days. But I must add, TODAY.. .my Mother DO NOT PLAY. LOL LOL She says she learned from the best. All of her kids (4) are great communicators and baby when I tell you now…. SHE WILL EMBARRASS YOU, because she knows how to get her point across. Sometimes I have to walk away if we’re in a store or place of business LOL LOL . She wont stop until she get her questions ask. Its so funny because she has come along way. I’m proud of her.

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Sharing Your Deepest Secret To Help Someone/BLOG

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I know a lot of people, and sometimes when they share life their lessons with me, I most times will share a similar story about what I’ve been though. Opening up about some of the things a person has went through can be painful. But its always helpful that the person you’re sharing them with can relate.

I remember a time when this young gurl came through my line when I was working as a cashier. She was pregnant, and when I  asked her when was her baby due, she told me that she was going to have an abortion soon. I was horrified! I was horrified because when my baby was just 3 months old, I found myself pregnant again at 19 with my second baby, and in my mind there was NO WAY EVER, I was going to have that baby. I told my first daughter father, and he told me that what ever I wanted to do he would support me. I didn’t  tell my family because I didn’t want them to talk me into having it, because I knew they would. In my mind I felt embarrassed, and I felt that I wouldn’t be able to take care and handle 2 kids. So, I had an abortion and never told ANYONE.

There I was in my early 40’s talking a young gurl out of having an abortion something I wouldn’t let anyone talk me out of. I told her that I felt the same way at her age.  I felt that I couldn’t take care of another baby and that it wasn’t even up for debate. But, she let me talk to her. I told her, look, you CAN take care of this baby, it seems as if you cant right now, but had I depended on God a little bit more, I would have my baby in my life . I told her that the person I am today.. I HATE that I had an abortion. Back then I didn’t know that I could make it, but now I know that I could have. I begged her to please have her baby, because I knew it would bring her joy the moment she laid eyes on her/him. I didn’t know what her final decision would be, but I know she heard and listened to me well.

One day I was having lunch in the Subway inside of the store. This young lady came up to me with a baby in the stroller and said with a huge smile, do you remember me? I looked at her and said, you look familiar, but I don’t. She said I’m the gurl you talked into having my baby, and here he is! I just burst out crying. I was so emotional. She said THANK YOU SO MUCH for talking me into having my baby, she said now every time I look at him, I feel bad for having that thought. She said he brings me joy and makes me happy,  said I don’t know what would I do without him. I was so happy and very emotional. I told her how hard it was for me to share my story with her, because I was ashamed for so many years, but I didn’t want her to turn out like me. To live with regret years later wondering what sex my baby was, how would he/she fit into my life today, and the biggest thing, KNOWING NOW, that I COULD have made it with God by my side. She said because of you, my baby is here. She was so happy and so grateful for that talk we had. She was a complete stranger. Wow, I wonder where they are today.

Sometimes we have to give up our deep buried secrets to help someone. I wanted to take my secret to the grave with me, but  God wouldn’t let me. What I went through I didn’t want her to experience. I was in my early 40’s, and had healed from it. I was at a place in my life where I could talk about it, and wanted to share it with someone to help them. Thank you Jesus! Thank you!

Chopin Script Regular