Tag: relationships

Posted on

Crossing the line in Marriage~ From the desk of Cree

creevirgoo
So, I’m sitting here watching the Real Housewives of Atlanta. Clearly reminding me of Why did I get married…… as Kenya is the one with NO HUSBAND, NO CHILDREN.. NO NOTHING… but trouble.
 
 
I’m having a hard time understanding why these other women can’t see the drama she’s bringing to the cast. Maybe its in their contract to have to sit there and be apart of something that only makes them look like weak women. Oh well… couldn’t be ME!
 
 
I’ve never been married. But I be darn, if I see my husband talking to someone who I clearly warned … that if you have any issues or conversations for ME or my HUSBAND… I need to always be present and apart of it. Now keep in mind this is not a random… this is because of an incident that happened in the past. My Question: Why is that so hard to understand? This is why when you’re speaking, you need to be CLEAR of what you’re saying ESPECIALLY when dealing with WOMEN…. it doesn’t need to be a 15 minute conversation…. only 3-5. To me either Apollo is either slow, or have a hard time understanding “lines you don’t cross” in a marriage.
 
 
After the relationship with my daughters father… I promised I would NEVER be insecure with my man.And I stayed true to my word. I realized I LOOK GOOD TOO. And, I sure don’t want a MAN who’s insecure either. If I ever had to be…. I would leave… one thing about LACREASE WALKER…. I have no problems leaving a friendship or relationship once I see its not working. NONE.. A BLESSING I TRULY HAVE. #GIFTOFGOODBYE. Let me say this…. I will work on my marriage, talk, cry, go to counseling, meet up with other married couples for advice…. but I refuse for my SELF ESTEEM to go down. Hell to the neva naw! 
 
 
Some women are so full of drama.. I wish a woman/man WOULD disrespect our relationship/marriage. The part that made me mad about is Pheadra, she’s so “sophisticated ” but maybe she didn’t want to really get down with him, because she was filming, but she should have made him come to the room with her to talk that out. I wouldn’t be able to sleep, or discuss anything else until we talked. I’m not going to beat around the bush, we’re not going to talk in front of company, we’re not going to use curse words to get our point across, we’re not going to raise our voices, and before we go to sleep…. we should have made up. All that next day, talking in codes, making him kiss her as*… I wouldn’t play all that. She’s keeping it build up inside and its causing resentment.. I can see it on her face. That will make a man step out too. Nope.. it aint right… but it happens.
 
 
Single women… like Kenya always have THE MOST TO SAY about people who are married. She doesn’t have a clue to mother hood or being a wife. Its so disrespectful to see her so deep into their business. I, do NOT play that at all. I wish a woman WOULD get in me and my husbands business.
 
 
First of all, the type of woman I am, I WILL NEVER make you feel as if you can comment on my relationship. And let me make this clear…. I say I don’t play that not because IM JUST SO GONE AND HEAD OVER HEELS OVER HIM… but its because that’s crossing the line. And when someone cross the line on MY BUSINESS with MY HUSBAND…. a beep goes off in my head.. meaning you’re IN MY LANE..I’ll give you that look, and you’ll have so many seconds to vacate the premises. From there… JUST HAVE GOD ON SPEED DIAL…. cause that’s what its going to take to get me to calm down.
 
 
Now let me say this….. both of my Sisters are married. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE , LOVE their husbands. They’re the best brother n laws any sister could have. The type of RELATIONSHIP me and my Sisters have…is this…… I don’t get in their business. My sisters don’t call me, text me, inbox me, or tell me the problems they’re having. FIRST OF ALL … I DON’T CARE… IT’S NOT MY BUSINESS. AND ITS NOT MY LANE. I love that, because when we’re all together, I feel good and comfortable around them. So, when they ask for my opinion about something in the relationship.. THEY ALWAYS VALUE IT. ALWAYS.. ALWAYS! They know I love them all, I don’t take sides JUST BECAUSE THEY’RE MY SISTERS. I tell them to truth, I use words to get to the point, and its not a 2 hour conversation. The truth is always to the point. This is why an authentic woman like me will always stand out.
 
 
So, I say all of that to say…..learn to stay in your lane when it comes to a Marriage. If God Blesses me with a Husband…..God, Communication, along with understanding, faithfulness, and keeping people out of our BUSINESS will be our guide….. THIS IS ONE AREA IN MY LIFE… I DO NOT PLAY! * 
 
Be Blessed!
 
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
Posted on

Change the atmosphere of that dysfunction …….. From the desk of Cree

phonephotriasing
Yesterday when I was in Meijer, I met these 2 lovely young ladies who was stacking salad and other items in that area. I was instantly connected to them because they were friendly and very helpful. Somehow we got on the subject of their mothers. One gurl moved here from Indiana and said she missed her mother so much. But the other gurl went on about how she felt her mom didn’t show her love at all growing up, and that when she have her baby she’ll show her baby much LOVE. So, I said… Let me ask you this: To your knowledge what have YOUR mother been through as a child? She said… my mother was poor, she went through a lot growing up. And after she had me, she got on drugs, couldn’t keep a job, she shared many things with us.
 
 
I told her sometimes after a woman has been though a lot, she doesn’t KNOW HOW to build a relationship with her children, she doesn’t KNOW HOW to love you like you should be loved. Sometimes a woman don’t know where to start with building a relationship with her children. She could be so hurt and so far gone IN HER DYSFUNCTION, that she doesn’t even recognize that she’s wrong even after hearing it all of her life. I said but do you have any children? She said I’m pregnant now. I told her, well this is YOUR chance and time to CHANGE THE CYCLE. Change the atmosphere, change the story, change your story with your mom. Do things YOUR way, be different, think different.
 
 
I told her, in NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO way am I saying that YOUR MOM was right. * she wasn’t* … but I AM saying since you cannot change that….. YOU must change the atmosphere of that dysfunction. I told her and when you do… don’t rub it in your mothers face how much better of a mother YOU ARE, because when you think you’ve done everything so perfect and different from your mom…. you daughter/son will get grown and TELL YOU how she/he felt YOU COULD HAVE DONE BETTER. She got it. I planted a seed. My work was done. Thank you Lord for placing me at the right place at the right time.
 
 
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
Posted on

Beyonce….. On the run Crees Blog Entry

When I tell you I LOVE this song.. I do!!! It plays constant in my mind.

 

 

 

 

It has a 90’s feel to it, so sincere, and so true to her life .Listen to her voice. I’ve never been married, but my idea husband has to be ride or die for me.  A  man who has my back, and YESSS… I have his. Our life and work compliments each other, same page, same book, same line. This song reminds me that this LOVE I’m in search of, is out there.

Thanks Beyonce and Jay!!!

Posted on

Women & Relationships *2* Crees Blog Entry

secure

I had to have been around 15 when I read this from the Bible.

 

2 Timothy 3:6

New King James Version (NKJV)

6 For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts,

I was horrified that one day this could be me. I remember thinking…. God please don’t let me seem gullible to a man where he comes into my life/home and make this Scripture true for ME. Still till this day… I believe with all my heart this is the reason why I NEVER let a man move in with me. Not only that but I never lived with him either. Its bad enough I’ve had my share of “clowns” without living together. And I will say this, women in these types of relationships are breaking up with these men….. after having their babies. That’s when low self esteem comes in, and the woe as me syndromes. Women we’ve got to pay more attention.

This can’t keep working. When it comes to these types of conversations and my friends come to me for advice. IM BRUTAL….. with LOVE. I am Zero Tolerance for this type of relationship behavior. MY advice to this women is this

  • find something about YOURSELF that you LOVE and ADMIRE

  • find out what it is that you like to do , that brings out your personality

I love and enjoy quiet time near The River. I have to make that kind of time for myself. Being near water for me brings a peace and calm…. I’ve never known. Make sure that you PUT THIS TIME ASIDE. It helps me to see life clearer, and the people that’s in it. What brings out my personality is… making small talk with strangers. I enjoy talking to people who are different than myself. They interest me, and I can always learn something new.

The more you get to know YOURSELF…. when “The One” does come along, he will appreciate you more for being YOUR OWN PERSON, not someone who needs HIM to come and “complete” you.

I know its hard being single…. but be a WOMAN who refuse to deal with any and everything, for the sake of “having a man”. And I noticed the SAME WOMEN.. who chose these types of men, are the first ones who will say…. my momma aint trying to help me, my friends aint there for me, don’t nobody care about how I get from A to B. Wont nobody come and pick me up. And I’ll say to them… YOU’RE REALLY MAD AT YOUR BOYFRIEND…because he’s not doing his job by providing a way for you to do those things…… HOW DARE YOU TURN THIS ON YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS!!! These type of women will blame all the names in their cell phones, before they’ll ADMIT… they made a wrong choice in their relationship.

Its okay to live alone, or with your children. Date a man for dear life if you have too. Stop be so submissive to the first man who tells you….. your hair is pretty. Know your own hair is pretty FIRST…. then let him put his AMEN with it. Compliments you’re hearing for the first time from a man… YOU MUST HAVE NEVER TOLD YOURSELF FIRST. So yes… of course it sounds good and special. Get to know YOU. A person is willing to help a single mother faster than they would a woman who has a NO GOOD MAN , sitting on her couch…… PLANT MANAGING A REMOTE CONTROL

 

 

Don’t wait around for other people to be happy for you. Any happiness you get you’ve got to make yourself. –Alice Walker

 

Be Blessed

 

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
Posted on

Women & Relationships *1* Crees Blog Entry

nice bridegroomb4wedding
I watch ID everyday. I think I’m seriously addicted to it. I can’t help but wonder what would we really know about things that happen behind the scenes in relationships without these shows giving us a inside look on how things got started.
 
 
What bothers me the most are the women who want to be LOVED, heard, needed, wanted, will put up with MANY THINGS just to be in a relationship. Many of them TOTALLY IGNORING the God inside of them… screaming… DO NOT DO IT… THIS MAN IS NOT FOR YOU. But see WOMEN…. we HOPE things get better. Even when we see signs of cheating, signs that he doesn’t want to work, signs of mental abuse and physical…. we still want to have FAITH in that person. But I’m hear to say.. aint gon happen!!!
 
 
Even if its hard for a woman to admit it…. these are signs of low self esteem. AT some point you want what’s best for YOURSELF. At the same time… a woman needs to KNOW what she will and WILL not deal with. Let me give this example: I can’t/ wont deal with a man who screams at me, or others. I like to talk things out in a voice that’s not conformational. You’re understood better, and the other person is actually listening. Because at A N Y point I detect you’re trying to LOUD talk me, proving that your voice is the loudest, while trying to shut me down…..then I will get LOUD too. This would mean.. … that whatever we’re going through won’t be heard because we’re screaming and yelling at each other. I wouldn’t recommend a person writing a list of “HOW THEY WANT THEIR MAN/WOMAN TO LOOK”… but I will say.. write out a list of things “YOU WONT DEAL WITH”. Not only that….. BUT STICK WITH IT.
 
Be Blessed
 
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
Posted on

ID Crees Blog Entry

id cree

I’m addicted to ID…Oh my goodness…. Sometimes I’m up to 4-5 am on the weekends watching these shows. Women are so gullible these days. I have so much I want to say…. this show has really changed the way I look at relationships. These online dating sites, and these needy men….. Oh WOMEN are something else too. I’ll be doing some post this week on this subject. Some of this stuff is SPOOKY. LOL LOL You can’t watch all these shows at night. LOL And I promise to very transparent. Okay….. talk later.

The video clip below is soooooooo SPOOKY TO ME.. The part at 1:37 when she covered her mouth.. OMG.  THE WAY SHE DID IT…..SO SCARY

Be Blessed

Posted on

David and Tamela Mann Crees Blog Entry

david and tamela
I’ve always been a huge fan of David and Tamela Mann the star of many of Tyler Perry plays and movies. Today they uploaded their 25th Wedding Anniversary that was actually last year!!! And it is all that I expected it to be. People will say Beyonce and J-Z is a POWER COUPLE.. Steve Harvey and his wife Marjorie, Will and Jada… but to me this is a “Everything” Couple…. and I just LOVE and admire them dearly. Enjoy.
 
 BE BLESSED
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
Posted on

Who really has the Power? Crees Blog Entry

Real-Housewives-of-Atlanta-Official-Cast-Photo-SFTA
I realized that I’m REAL QUICK to tell somebody….. if someone on your Facebook page is negative and post attention seeking stats….. to delete them or ignore their post.
 
 
But when it comes to RHOA Nene Leakes and Kenya Moore…. I can’t seem to follow my own advice….. to stop watching the show.
 
 
After this past Sunday’s episode…. my blood was boiling, and all I could do was walk around my apartment, to try and understand “what type of people are these women”? I can EASILY SIT HERE AND SAY… you know what.. that’s them! This is how they are, this has nothing to do with me, I’m going to HEAVEN.. what they do is on them. I could sit here and say….I don’t care what comes out of their mouth…. they’ll have to pay the consequences for being MEAN GURLS. And when things start to fall apart for them…. they did it to themselves.
 
 
But I don’t want to feel that way. I care too much. So, I asked myself why? 
 
 
For me…. when I see these BEAUTIFUL, SUCCESSFUL, BLACK WOMEN with their OWN TV show… IN MY MIND…. they’re suppose to represent just who they are. I HATE to see them gossiping, disrespecting each others marriages and relationships. A few of them are so insecure that they PRIDE themselves on learning and studying “damaging information” on their cast mates….anything to look better. Its so sickening and sad.
RHOA-Season-6-Screenshots-7
 
 
But here is my biggest issue. These women not only have the PODUIM AND STAGE to uplift themselves and others, but they have the POWER to show the world God. I know not everyone will get on TV and do that…. but here is what I DO KNOW. If they continue to get on TV to disrespect themselves and others instead of uplifting and motivating……… where they show out on STAGE ( TV, Media) WILL BE WHERE GOD SHOW THEM…………..WHO REALLY HAS THE POWER. That day is coming. I see it. One by one.
 
 
My prayer is that someone will pull them to the side and talk to them.
 
 
BE BLESSED
 
 
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
Posted on

Fingerpointing You………………………Crees Blog Entry

mestrikeaposewedding

As I sit here  thinking about the post I wrote about Dwayne Wade and Gabrielle Union.. it takes me back to my own personal relationships about cheating, and lies. The questions I had.

Every man I’ve ever given a second chance to… he cheated again. Sad thing about that.. these men are with different women now, some married and they’re still cheating. Now, there are some faithful men out there that love their wives dearly. And if they’re cheating, as long as his wife doesn’t detect it….. he’s not cheating. LOL I just wish that I could understand the thought process of a man before he thinks about doing it. What options does he weigh, what thoughts goes through his mind concerning her finding out? What would he say to her? What would be his reason that he tells her? Does he sees himself losing everything, or is that even a thought to him? Does he think about his family, or her feelings? What desire goes through his mind when he decide that its what he’s going to do anyway. What thought or feeling goes though his mind once the sexual act is over. And what drives him to do it again and again. Does he feel a sexual disconnection to his mate?

For a long time, I can remember calling over my friends every weekend just to drink and have a pity party. We dogged men coming and going. I use to date my daughters teacher when she was in preschool. Then when I started working there the following year, I found out that he was dating the teachers and the parents. * throws hands up… eyes closed* And didn’t I get into an argument with one of the ladies at the school, almost lost my job over this man? I cut dissed him ON SPOT. I made sure I went to work looking good everyday. I made him “SEXUALLY SICK” when ever he saw me. He couldn’t even function with me around. I had his mind gone. I can’t go for that type of behavior anymore. I LOVE ME. He knew he couldn’t tie my shoe if it was coming loose.

But you know…… I had to put away childish things. I couldn’t go on being angry with men because I chose cheaters. I realized that I was drawing these types of men to me. I had to change the way I looked at my relationships. I had to say NO… to the ones who didn’t fit into what I was looking for. So many times I got into relationships “just because they liked me”. These days….. I chose friendships and relationships wisely. They must have a relationship with God, they must be a person who goes to God before any family member and a friend.

Here is a song that I use to listen to when I was going through those relationships…. I love the words.. so honest and to the point.

Fonz
I don’t know what you goin thru lately
But you stressin it and it’s drivin me crazy
You wont even make love to me lately
Somebody told you they was havin my baby

Vee
I heard it all I was getting my nails done
She was braggin how your record when platinum
You were crushin on a leather couch
You were out there trickin with that chick all up in my house

Did you sleep with her
Did you sleep with him
He works at my job
She was just a friend
Saw you at the club
Well I saw you too
Fingerpointing me
Fingerpointing you

Vee
She knew it all even talked about your tattoo
Tell me how you gonna say it wasn’t bout you (wasn’t me)
Saying how you like to suck on toes
She knew all the things that you know that only I should know

Fonz
You played the role I was workin in the studio
Getting paid while you gave up the botty yo
Another brotha is getting all my time
You was out there trickin when I thought that shit was all mine all mine

Did you sleep with her
Did you sleep with him
He works at my job
She was just a friend
Saw you at the club
Well I saw you too
Fingerpointing me
Fingerpointing you
Did you sleep with her
Did you sleep with him
He works at my job
She was just a friend
Saw you at the club
Well I saw you too
Fingerpointing me
Fingerpointing you

Fonz: Your thru with me
Vee: Im thru with you
Fonz: You lied to me
Vee: Never lied to you
Fonz: Stop blamin me
Vee: Im blamin you
Fonz: Stop gamin me
Vee: Whos gamin who
Fonz: So you say your thru with me
Vee: Im thru with you
Fonz: You lied to me
Vee: Never lied to you
Both: Better ask yourself if don’t matter baby why keep goin on

Did you sleep with her
Did you sleep with him
He works at my job
She was just a friend
Saw you at the club
Well I saw you too
Fingerpointing me
Fingerpointing you
Did you sleep with her
Did you sleep with him
He works at my job
She was just a friend
Saw you at the club
Well I saw you too
Fingerpointing me
Fingerpointing you

Fonz: can’t work with you lying and creepin babe
Vee: I can’t work I can’t deal with your cheatin and leavin babe(I can’t deal)
Fonz: can’t be a fool for lovin babe
Vee: Save the drama im about to bounce babe
Cant work with you lying and creepin babe
Vee: I can’t work I can’t deal with your cheatin and leavin babe(I can’t deal)
Fonz: can’t be a fool for lovin babe
Vee: Save the drama im about to bounce babe

Did you sleep with her
Did you sleep with him
He works at my job
She was just a friend
Saw you at the club
Well I saw you too
Fingerpointing me
Fingerpointing you

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
Posted on

Love will follow….Cree’s Blog Entry

Growing up this was one of my MOMMA favorite songs. I hear it and think of her. Someone posted this on FB today and it took me back. I never knew Shanice did the song with Kenny, and the way it came out was beautiful. I was going to post the version of just him singing, but when I clicked on them doing it together, I posted this one. Enjoy.

 

 

I run out of breath and start to shake I love you with all my heart can take I hold you beside me in my sleep And long to be dreaming endlessly
We’ve come into a place in time Where I am yours and you’re mine A circle filled with love
If you come away with me I can show you ecstasy Close your eyes and we will lead And love will follow
Take a chance and hold my hand I know you’ll understand We’ll find a special land And love will follow
A smile on your lips and in your eyes A stranger adrift in paradise You touch me and slowly move away Take all of the night you need to take, babe
Just wait a little while and see What you mean to me I’ve waited all my life
If you come away with me I can show you ecstasy Close your eyes and we will lead And love will follow
Use your wings and fly away And come with me today Your heart will lead the way And love will follow
(If this was just a chance of make-believe You’d never feel it this way) I’ve always wanted to love somebody As much as I, I’m wanting you now
[Musical interlude]
We’ve come into a place in time Where I am yours and you’re mine A circle filled with love
If you come away with me I can show you ecstasy Close your eyes and we will lead And love will follow
Girl, I swear I love you so Tonight you’re gonna know And everywhere we go Love will follow
Use your wings to fly away And come with me today Your heart will lead the way And love will follow
I’ve always wanted to love somebody As much as I am loving you now
(Hold on, hold on tight, hold on, my baby, hold on) (Hold on, hold on tight, hold on, my baby, hold on) (Hold on, hold on tight, hold on, my baby, hold on) (Hold on, hold on tight, hold on, my baby, hold on) (Hold on, hold on tight, hold on, my baby, hold on) (Hold on, hold on tight, hold on, my baby, hold on) (Hold on, hold on tight, hold on, my baby, hold on) (Hold on, hold on tight, hold on, my baby, hold on)
Design a site like this with WordPress.com
Get started