Hey Family!!! I have lots to talk about tonight!! Lets jump right into it.
I’m a thinker, and this is one I’ve been thinking about for a while. Years ago when I was a young gurl before the age of 14, my dad always told ME.. that I had a sister out there. She was his step mothers SISTER. It was a huge secret back in the day because at the time he was young and still at home, and if his dad knew this, he would have kicked him out of the house FOR GOOD. So the gurl had the baby, but it was a secret who the father was until later on in the gurls life when people started to talk.
For me…. I always wanted to meet her. I’m very close with my siblings and to find out that I have a sister out there was like heaven for me. I thought about her all the time. Asking my dad questions he didn’t want to answer sometimes. But one day he got a knock on the door.. and it was HER. Not only did she come for answers, but it was also told to her that her mom was raped by my uncle((( by marriage))) , and that it was a possibility that she was his child. My cousins (( his daughters)) wanted a blood test to know either way, but that never happened and it kinda devastated me.
One day she called and said that she was coming to Detroit to visit her family and that she wanted to meet up with me and my siblings at my dad’s house. We finally had the meet I PRAYED TO GOD FOR. I got to see her face to face, stare at her, hug her and just Thank God for that moment. But when she left, we didn’t communicate much at all, and when my uncle who she felt was her dad.. passed away…. she made it known that she felt HE was her dad. I was good with that part. Because I Thanked God for us meeting. God gave me exactly what I asked for… and that was to meet her face to face. But I expected more. I wanted to have a blood test taken, and if she was my Sister start a relationship with her, my niece and nephews. I feel that I was “short changed” in a way. She decided not to take the test , and I had to be good with that choice she made. Its funny, how God will give you the desires of your heart, but he never reviled the outcome. Thing is, he comforted me during those days after the meet. I cant be mad at him for how things turned out, because he gave me what I asked for… A MEET. There will always be a “what if” in the back of my mind when I see her post on FB. I love her and Thank God all the time that I got a chance to meet her. 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂
Which brings me to Tyler Perry.. another person who I always wanted to meet since I was introduced to Madea. I love me some Tyler Perry and the work that he brings to life on stage and on the screen. But since meeting my sister and having HIGH EXPECTATIONS… I’m good. Not that I don’t want to meet him, I want him to want to meet ME. I’m just not good with expecting something so great to happen (( a friendship with him and my sister as well)) and it not happen. If its God’s will.. it shall be. Other than that I’m Okay. I’m going to sit back and let God do this… I’m out of it. It feels natural that way 🙂 🙂 🙂
I AM La’Crease (( I don’t have to do anything else))
Sitting here enjoying my night off. Just thinking about how God will turn things around in your life. I’m so happy that I wrote down everything that I was going through, so now when I go back and read it, it makes me feel so good that I stayed in the race. I’m living each day with a different mind set. In 2013 I packed up and moved to Georgia. I wanted a new life, wanted to move into an apartment somewhere tucked near water and trees. Sorta like isolate myself. Boy did God have another plan for me. And even though I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE ATLANTA…. I’m so glad I moved back home. I’m a family gurl. Raised with both parents in the home, I’m VERY close with my brother and my 2 sisters, not to mention the love I have for my nieces and nephews. Thing is…. I can drive/fly to Atlanta anytime, and stay as long as I want. Wow… no one told me that. LOL Atlanta will always be my second home. But NOTHING beats this DOWNTOWN DETROIT LIVING!!! I’M IN LOVE 🙂
I get to spend lots of time with my parents. When I came home, I found a 7 floor Senior Apartment * they live separately in the same complex* that is directly around the corner from me. Yes! If I leave my apartment right now, I will be at theirs in 2 minutes. I take them * my siblings as well* to the grocery store, to their doctors appointments, to dinner and other outings. They need me and I need them. My daughter lives around the corner from me, and its funny because my brother does too. My street is my brothers SIDE STREET. My daughter street is MY SIDE STREET. Yea we all live downtown and around the corner from each other. Wow God… never seen that in my forecast. We always get together for dinner and birthdays and of course just because days. Family is everything. If you can get alone with your family you can get alone with ANYONE!
I Am … La’Crease
Yesterday was the first day I made a PRIVATE Facebook page sharing my testimony to a selected 100 of when I went moved to Atlanta and back to Detroit. Its a very long Testimony, and I will post some everyday until the end. This should take about 2-3 weeks. Many are being Blessed already. I did NOT want to even write it, but God kept telling me to do it, and for my DISOBEDIENCE… I paid for it. So, it is written! LOL LOL It is done Lord!!!
Just sitting here thinking. Even though I never share my personal private life here…. its funny how I can be in LOVE with one, and REALLY REALLY LIKE another. I just LOVE a take charge man. And I don’t know what is it about me that makes them “get with me”…. like I’m tough or something. Its so funny to me, cause I love a man who talk smack in a loving playful way. And let me clear what I mean by that. Not violent, who will curse me out, belittle me or anything like that. I LOVE to laugh and have a good time. I wonder how many others out there feels this same way about loving one man/woman, and like another.
Anyway…….Today has been a very interesting day. I’m just outdone and speechless. But it is what it is… and <CREE> knows how to keep it moving.
Someone close to me is about to go through a bitter divorce. So sad the stories that’s coming out of it. I’m just numb about a few things, but its all good… Sorry for the rambling… plus I’m sleepy too.
Friday night my 2 sisters and I went out to dinner at Applebees…. we sat for 5 hours talking and catching up on our lives. We were having many conversations but the one that stood out the most was the fact that we’re not jealous when it comes to being in a relationship. For me I was never a jealous person until I met my daughters father. Before him I was never insecure. I knew I was pretty, had a great family, nice personality… but when I met him and having to deal with all the women. It made me a bitter person. It took me years to get over him and over the way the relationship made me feel. Over the years I met some pretty good men, that always made me feel so loved and so wonderful. I never had to deal with jealousy again.
The reason why I’m writing this is to say to my Sisters out there. Know you’re beautiful. Know that you are loved by God no matter how a man make you feel. Know that if you have to be in a relationship that makes you have to always look over your shoulders because of other women, or have to fight or go back and forth…. please don’t waste anytime getting help, or leaving that relationship. What woman in their right mind want to feel jealous and insecure of another woman? Women these days lose themselves in a marriage or in a unmarried relationship. You have to still love your life and enjoy it.
Let me say this too…. Sisters, you have to do your part in making your man feel secure. When you start trying to make him jealous, then one day down the line, it just maybe you….. who gets jealous . That’s a dangerous game to play. Find ways to entertain yourselves while he’s not around. Visit family and friends….. Don’t build your life around him…. that when he wants and needs a break, you find yourself whining and bored. Many women push themselves away from their family and friends when they get married or enter a relationship. Never do that. You never want to look up and have no one….but him. Down the line it makes him uncomfortable, and he’ll have to always find ways to entertain you. That’s not fair. Build your own life, and at the end of the day… go home to the LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.
Listen to yourself and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God. – Dr. Maya Angelou
Entertainment, Business, Women and Teens
Finding my purpose in life.
What is my calling? What are my gifts?
Entertainment- When I was 14 years old I was IN LOVE with Prince. I told my mom when he come to Detroit, I wanted to be there. She took me, not once, but twice. What a dream come true. Ever since then I fell in love with Entertainment. Not only was I enjoying Prince, but I love the live experience, the back ground singers, and especially the musicians. I love the way it made me feel. I felt so alive. When I moved out on my own I started going to more and more concerts. I would win concert tickets off the radio, and when I went to pick up my tickets, I met a wonderful Radio Personality for WJLB name Janet G. She was so nice and sweet to me. I love her to this day!!! There were many times when she would call me down and she would just give me concert tickets, that was often. I believe that she played a huge role in me loving entertainment as much as I do. I enjoyed going to see the Male Dancers as well 4-5 times a week, just to see them do routines fast and slow.
I missed a lot of concerts waiting on others to go with me, or to get their money together, so I started going alone. It was hard in the beginning. I started buying tickets without telling anyone. Seem like every time I went with others, I was getting seats way in the back, but when I went alone I was sitting in rows 1-5….. every time. I went to several plays before I knew who Tyler Perry was, but when I went to one that was terrible…. I vowed to never, ever go see another play again. I also enjoyed comedy. At concerts and plays I started paying more attention to what was going on back stage than what I came to see. I wanted to be apart of a backstage crew. I enjoy planning and how things came together. I absolutely LOVE ENTERTAINMENT. To name a few of my favorite concerts and plays that I’ve attended would be…… Anita Baker, The Late Great Gerald Levert, Barry White and Luther Vandross, Karen Clark-Sheard, Shirley Caesar, Missy, Mary J Blige, Janet Jackson. Destiny Child, Kelly Price, Jill Scott, Chante Moore, Maxwell, and Tyler Perry. Too many to name. I know for a fact, that Entertainment is apart of my calling.
Business- I LOVE taking care of business. I love to hear YES… in all my business ventures. Sometimes I push it , but its all good. When I was in my 20’s I learned how to speak well over the phone and in person to get my way. My family and friends would call me and have me to pretend to be them because they were nervous. I’m good over the phone, but face to face .. IM EVERYTHING. Seem like I can never get my way through email because I come off too persistent, and people LOVE to tell me No because they can’t see me. It started for me when I was a young gurl, my mom would make business calls and they would always tell her No, or make her have to do all of these unnecessary steps. Sometimes I felt that they sense that she was nervous about handling her business * which she was*, and they always gave her the hardest time. That bothered me. So, I made sure that when I became an adult, that wasn’t going to happen to me. Just tonight she called me and gave me a phone number to call in the morning so that I can take care of her business for her.
I learned that you have to have all your questions written down before you make calls. You have to speak with authority and know what you want. You can’t be afraid to ask question. Its your business, and you should feel comfortable asking whatever you want and need to know. I put together a lot of things, and in order to do this, I have to make these kinds of calls. If I have to see them in person….. that’s even better. I know for a fact, that the business is apart of my calling.
Women and Teens- I’ve always had a connection to them I learned to keep secrets at a young age, and it was needed in order to gain the trust of women and teens. No matter how deep the story is, God has always given me the tolerance to hear all kinds of unbelievable stories. I use to cry a lot when I’d hear the stories because they would be so devastating. But over the years God has strengthen me in this area where I’m able to listen and not take it personal. I’ve put together many Women’s Gathering, where we get personal, talk about God, and discuss how to deal with issues in relationships. I’ve worked in Detroit Public Schools for over 9 years total and I loved it. When my book is released, I know so many women will read it and change their lives. I know for a fact, that Women and Teens are apart of my calling.
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
Communication, Personality, Keeping it moving
Finding my purpose in life.
What is my calling? What are my gifts?
Communication– I found out early in life that when I spoke…. people listened. I never found myself to be an interesting person at all, but I knew that the way I expressed myself in Honesty and in Truth people trusted me. When I speak, I aim to get right to the point. I learned that in order to be a great communicator, you have to use different tones of voice. My dad use to always scream at us to get his point across, and I HATED THAT. So when I had my daughter, I screamed at her. But what I found out is, just like me, she didn’t require that tone of voice. She was just like me a gentle gurl, all we needed was to be told once, in a nice tone of voice and we got the point. I’m glad I learned that before she got in her teens. Because there’s no telling how her communications skills would be today. I thought I was good at communicating, she may have me beat….. and I’m good!!!
When dealing with people, communication is one of my best traits. I always make sure my facial expression is approachable. That’s very important because who wants to hold a conversation with someone whose face is twisted and unpleasant? It goes both ways, when I want something, and I have to approach a person in charge, I always make sure my smile is on, and my body language and face expression is not defensive. That’s important because these are people who are in position to give you either an answer you’re looking for, or one you have to negotiate. I have gotten myself out of plenty of situations by being able to communicate and use facts that will give me a desired out come. I use to feel that you have to “get with people” in order to get what you want. I found out very quickly that people who have attitudes, have the most drama stories to share. My goal in life is to have the most success stories to share. I know for a fact, that communication is apart of my calling.
Personality– Growing up, I felt that I was a complete “nerd”. I was always in my room alone reading. But when I got in my 20’s, I knew I had a huge personality when, if there was 9 of us in the room, I would get into it with all 9 people before the night was over. LOL That’s bad. I didn’t know how to control my mouth, or my behavior. All I knew was that I had this huge personality, and for some reason when the night was over, I knew how to make up with EVERY person in the room. And I did…. every single time. I admit my personality always got me in trouble with my family, friends, and my jobs. I had no control of something so powerful. My strong personality got me in trouble, but my even stronger communication skills got me out of it. Once I knew I had these gifts, I started using them for good. Not to argue or debate with anyone, but to inspire, uplift and encourage people. I combine my gifts to be a great listener by using Godly wisdom, and reading my bible daily. I knew how to love and to receive love because that’s all my parents showed me growing up. By reading and writing, I studied the behavior of people, and by communicating I was able to get things in my FAVOR. Once I realized the Power my personality had, I wanted to do right. I wanted to be a better person because people listened to me. They wanted me in their presence. I made them smile, laugh and look at life in a different light. When before I made them angry and mad at me. I lost a lot of friends and jobs because of my personality, and I’m still learning.
When I was in my teens I would read my bible every day. I was addicted to the stories and to the Love God have for us. I would find interesting Scriptures and write them down, go through the white pages and mail them to people. I have this desire to see people go to Heaven (((make it))), then and more especially now. When I moved out on my own, I had more money to buy postage stamps. I never told anyone, I just did it. I would pray over the stack, and take them to the mailbox which was at the corner of my apartment. I know for a fact, that having a strong personality is apart of my calling.
Keep it Moving– This is one gift that I knew I had, but hated using it. I associated it with being mean or funny acting. But I NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, knew that it was needed to go with my personality. I now realize that I attract a lot of people, and for the people who aren’t good for me…. I need the gift of keeping it moving. I have absolutely no problems with letting people go. It takes my two Sisters to sit and tell this story about me. They say I don’t give chances I just cut people off. I do give chances, they just see when I’m done. God has always, always showed me who was for me and was not, it was always my choice to keep them in the picture. I always knew that when I cut you off, it was a WRAP!!! IM DONE.
I love people, but I’m not attached to anyone on this earth. God gave me the Entrance to Love everyone, but he also showed me the Exit to keep it moving. ITS ONE OF MY FAVORITES TOO. I know for a fact, that the gift of keeping it moving is apart of my calling.
Tomorrow * Final* – Travel, Business, Entertainment