Prayer, Everytime, Cute Guy, Goals

Hey,
  Whew what a week! First let me say to God I Love you. Prayer is the bomb. Thanks for introducing me to it! And you know what Im talking about!
I had a good week at work. Ive been so nice to the customers, a few got on my nerves, but the whole week was nice, and Im so happy. There is always one person who get on your nerves, but I am thankful that I can bounce back soon as that “person” has left. Making other people pay for that one person is not right.
 
Hey, I found that song from Dr. Dre’s soundtrack of The Wash. Its by Toi and its called “Everytime”. I cant find the sound track, but my baby Neisha found it on line and its on my play list. Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhha
 
This guy that I met in Walmart and use to talk to on the phone, came in Walmart yesterday. It was one of my ugly ugly ugly days. When he got my attention to say “hi”, I wanted to slap him and say “if you see me looking ugly for that day, don’t stop me to say hi, and then have me looking at you, and youre looking good”. He was looking good too. Um Um Um. That “pimp”( my ghetto figure of speech) (man) was looking nice. Ughhhh, I dont even want to remember yesterday. UGH
 
 
Next year I have some serious goals that I want to fullfill. I am going to write them down so that I can go back to them.
  1. * Tithe ~ on every check
  2. * Lose weight before July 17, 2006
  3. * Keep my hair and nails done
  4. * Get a new car or truck
  5. * Be serious about Pearls of Wisdom ( Ministry)

Well, Im closing for now, gotta go and do some Ministry work. I will talk to you later, God bless you all reading.

 

Lacrease (thatgurltheycallcredog)

 
 
 
 
 
 

The Net, Sensitve, My Sisters, Thank you Lord, Ministry Ideas

The Parable of the Net
 47“Once again, the kingdom of heaven is like a net that was let down into the lake and caught all kinds of fish. 48When it was full, the fishermen pulled it up on the shore. Then they sat down and collected the good fish in baskets, but threw the bad away. 49This is how it will be at the end of the age. The angels will come and separate the wicked from the righteous 50and throw them into the fiery furnace, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

Matthew 13

 

I remember growing up when my dad use to take us fishing, we would throw our fishing rods out and when we caught a fish, my dad would look at it and throw it back if it wasn’t good. That reminds me of this parable so much. Wouldn’t it be something if you were one of those that the Angels threw back? Oh goodness that would that be so spooky? It don’t take much for me to imagine this scripture happening and to see the gnashing of the teeth and all the weeping that will be going on. I can close my eyes and imagine these things taking place.

 

Today was not one of my best days at work. My teeth is very sensitive in the back and it bothered me for 2 of the hours I was there. I was just so irritated and I just wanted to get home take me an advil and go to sleep. Before I went to work I was watching TV, my tooth was aching and all of a sudden this commercial came on about this new medicine to help sensitive teeth. I couldn’t wait to get to work to buy it. Well, when I got there I couldn’t find it right away. So when I did find it I looked at the price and almost fell out. I didn’t care that it cost $12.00 all I knew is that I needed it and I needed it now. I realized that I had left my Visa Card at home, and didn’t have 7 dollars to go with my $5.00. I asked a few people and as usual cant no body help me. Its funny cause I was getting mad, and it seems like whenever someone need something, I have it. I needed them few dollars bad, so I asked April and she gave it to me. I went home and use it, and um um um this stuff is the BOMB. Whew Im so happy, this will last 3 months and now I can enjoy the cold things, and I can enjoy not being bothered with the pain and irritation.

Tonight me and my sisters went to dinner. Peedie called me a few days ago and said that we as sisters need to get out and do things, and talk as sisters do. So we decided to go to Texas Road House tonight for dinner and we had a ball, laughing, and just enjoying each other. We talked about everything, whew we had a good time, we sat for hours and hours. We agreed to do that at least once a month.

 Lord, I want to Thank you publicly for matching me up with the sisters that you gave me. You could have given me 2 different sisters. But you wanted me to have these 2 as my sisters. Peedie and Na. And I can’t thank you enough. I love my sisters sooooooo much. Our kids are close, we all have 1 daughter a piece and  they are so very close. Lord, Thank you for that. Thank you, and I love you for that. I could never ask for anybody else. I am truly bless. I know it Lord, I see it and I feel it. Thank you again. Thank you.

 

A few weeks ago I prayed for God to restore the sensitivity in me for people again. I had lost love for people, and when I had a talk with God, I told him that I didn’t like people. I told him that they make me sick, and no matter how friendly I went to work, when it came time to ring up people, I treated them badly. I didn’t want to put their bags in their carts, I ignored them (still got to work on that), I didn’t smile, I just didn’t like them and I told God just that. But then one day I realized that it was taking a toll on me. I was feeling ugly and mean. I didn’t want to go on treating people like that. Because I am a person who loves people. I can look at somebody and cry if they had one leg, or if they even had a sad look on their face. I needed him to give that love back to me for his people. I love people very much. I can talk to people and make them laugh, motivate them, lift their spirits, but all of that was gone. After God heard my prayer he restored the love for the people back in me. I can feel it, I care now, I talk to them now, I feel like a yes, yes, ma’am and sir person. And I love that about me. Today was not a good day, but tomorrow will be better………..watch and see.

 

I bought another movie. Well,…………..a few of them. Asunder with Blair Underwood and Debbie Morgan, and her husband in the movie was Michael Beach. It was sooooo good. Betta ask somebody! And I bought The Fantastic 4 which is also a good movie. Im a movie buff as you can see. I am waiting for the 4 brothers to come out.

 

I am about to work on some ideas for Pearls of Wisdom. Its time we do more, and its time we reach out more, its time we pray on things more, its time we leave certain things out, and focus on Ministry. So, Im going to drop some ideas on the group and see what they say.

 

Well, Im about to close for now, but I will be back tomorrow,

 

Lacrease

 
Tyler Perry’s
Madea’s Family Reunion~ Feb 24, 06
Learn dignity.
Demand respect

The Race

First I want to say Thank you Lord for waking me up this morning to start a new day! Thank you Lord. When I woke up this morning that told me that you wanted me to be in the race one more day!
 

24Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

 25Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. 26Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. 27No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

 

  Yes that scripture tells me that I am still in the race! One more day.

Today was a good day. I was kinda irrated a little tho. I picked Neisha up from school, and we went to bath and body works to get my best friend Gloria this pretty purse with lotions inside. She loves purses, she will spend her last on a purse for real. So we goes in and I get the purse because I knew already what I wanted. And when I looked into the bag, I didn’t like the lotions they had for the purse. The purse is $36.00. So I asked the cashier if I can exchange the lotions for another kind and she said yes. So she went to get the lotions and when she came back she didn’t have the 4 oz bath lotions for it. So she asked her boss (white lady) if she can give me 2 , 2 ounce bath lotions for the 4 oz that she couldn’t find. She gon say nooooooooo Im sorry if we dont have it, then we cant substitute it. so IM like they still add up to 4oz. I was instantly heated. I turned my head and stood there, not giving her any eye contact. She wanted to stand there and tell me why she couldn’t do it. But then her gurl walks in and they stand there laughing and ha ha and hee heing. So I was like forget it! And I walked out the store. Tomorrow Im going back and Im going to get that set, even if I had to leave out the 4 oz lotions. I bet if  one of the ladies she was snickering with needed to do that, she would. I can see it in her face.

 Any way that set off my day at work. But after about an hour I was okay. A few people got on my nerves, acting dumb and slow. I worked the 12 items or less lane, and people were getting in my line talking about “I have 15 items can you take me’? I was sooooooooooooooooooo irrated! Cause thats not fair to the other people in line with 12 items or less. Then they get mad at me, cause my face balled up and Im not aruging with them. Thats what they want so they can go and tell on you. I can hear them now “May I see your manager’? What is your name? Can’t none of them customers tell on me, cause when I get mad at them, they gets NO eye contact, they get a receipt and a have a nice day! rofllll Hell if I say something they will be ready to tell on me, then if I look ugly in the face……………. what can they  say I said ? Nothing! What they gon tell I was making faces? haha Then the people who do have less then 12 items be looking at me like………….aint you gon say something to them? Please you can’t win for losing. You just have to learn to shut up, and have that face on, like…………let’s make this transaction real quick so you can roll up outta my line…….. “MAAM”. Ughhhh

This is a me me me world. Its all about me. People want things fast, right now, hurry up, get my lacta please now kinda world. Well, they got Credog messed up. This lady came through my line tonight (black) and had this walgreens coupon for $3.00 off some ink for a printer. I told the lady that we dont take Walgreens coupons. Then she was like “well I called the lady on the phone and she said yall take other peoples coupons”. And Im like we price match, and yes we take coupons, but we dont take coupons that say “Walgreens” on them. She kept on wanting to over power me talking. So I hit the switch on my register so a  CSM could come over. I aint hardly bout ta argg with this woman. I said gurllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll ( sho did) let me call somebody ova here. Cause we dont take these coupons and Im tired of trying to convince you we dont.

 So Mary came over and Im saying to myself, ( maam you really aint getting it now, cause Mary don’t play) Mary was like maam this says “Walgreens” then the lady says well dont  yall take coupons and we said yeahhhhhhhhha, paper coupons not something that clearly have another company name on it! She was like okay!

But see ,no matter what I do, I cant do nothing about how people think or act. Its up to me to act in a way that is pleasing to God and that’s it. Im not going to spend my days and nights trying to figure out why and how concerning people and their ways. Nope not Lacrease.

Last night I got a letter for a woman who has been through a lot in her life. And by reading it makes me want to walk a straight line into my blessings. Meaning to be grateful and to enjoy the life I already have. Rather its without   friends, without mom, a sister, brother, a husband, boyfriend, grand parents, nieces, nephews, cousins, and father. People are going through far worse than the next person. That letter taught me something spiritually. And thats to enjoy what you have, to enjoy whatever moment you are in, to enjoy the freedom of your fingers, and hands, the freedom of having your heart beat, and your mind on right, your legs to walk, your arms to hug, your eyes to see, your tongue to speak. It has open my eyes to see that my problems are so small compare to others, so with that said. Go out and live your life. No more foolish arguing, and going back and forth with people, debating, acting jealous, holding grudges, GET OVER IT! God has the power to take away everything that is hurting you.

That letter reminded me to get over it! It hit me hard it really did. I started thinking about the guy who molested me when I was a young gurl. What if I just couldn’t get over the fact that he did that to me. ( Which I have forgave him in my mind) what if he died. What would I do then? How would I feel? Would I feel happy that he is not alive ? How could that make me feel better? Get over it while he is alive, and Ill guarantee you, you’ll sleep better when he’s dead.

Last night I was watching TV and I saw on the news where this black lady and this white lady slept outside with some homeless people to raise awareness. And God knows it touched my heart, cause thats what I want to do soooooooo bad. And I am going to get my wish one day. I am going to work with homeless people, I believe that’s my calling. To walk pass them when they are outside begging and standing there cold. That just does something to me that is making me cry right now. God is rich, there is no reason at all for them to be out there like that. Our father is rich! He is rich, he owns all of this here in this world, why are they outside freezing cold, not wanting to live? Where are the families? How did they get like this? I would love to sit outside one night for a camp out, and hear the testimonies of those people. I rather do that, than sit up and hear a story of how many bedrooms are in your new million dollar house. And thats on everythang!

I want to wash the back of an older homeless woman , comb her hair and listen to her stories. Listen to her childhood life, and her good days. I want to wash her feet and massage her scalp as she brings back memories of a good life she once had. I want to braid her hair, and ask questions as to how she some how got disconnect and lost her way. Thats whats in my heart. Talking to people and holding a good conversations these days just turns me into a monster. I rather talk to a homeless person on a 10 degree night under blankets, than to talk to a woman who is complaning about her  life. It does nothing for me.

 I think about me sitting at home with my computer typing, and my 4 bedroom nice neighborhood house, with a car parked outside full of gas, just left a job, money in the bank, Christmas gifts stored all around the house, food in the refrigerator. It reminds me of how blessed I am. Sometimes with all my complaing I wonder if I deserve this. Im not saying I want to be homeless and Im not thankful for my life, its that what’s inside of me, thats burning to change the thinking of these people. I have it inside of  me through God. And one day I am going to have the opportunity to bring out this side of me. And Im going to lead people to God, and then they are going to be trained to be leaders and lead someone else to God. That’s what I want to do in this life. I wish I had lots of money. I would open up a center right here near me and have it for homeless people. Set up programs to get them back into the system. To help them with self esteem, and how to communicate with people, and do deal with past falls. Then get back out there and move moutains. God is a good God. He got it like that. He is our father, he is rich!

Daily Im learning that people are so out of touch. We don’t realize how grateful we are. We complain, and grumbling all day about nothing. And I’m the ring leader. But when I read of stories, and hear of things that are happening to other people and is skipping right pass my ungrateful a**. I get irrated. 911 skipped pass me, New Orleans skipped right pass me, death in my family skipped right pass me, war in Iraq family members fighting the war…..skip right pass me, Tsunami, ……skipped right pass me, car jackings and shootings in my family ……, skipped right pass me. Its time we give God some praise while the time is still light. Cause when it gets dark, woe on those who don’t know. Woe on those ungrateful, hateful, UN forgiving so and So.’s. The time is now, And this especially goes for me  the AUTHOR OF THIS BLOG!

I went out and bought Mr.& Mrs. Smith the DVD and the soundtrack, cause its off the chainnnnnnn. OMG. I aint loved a sound track like this since Diary of A Mad Black Woman. My favorite songs on here are Baby, baby, Lay lady Lay,  Mongo Bongo, and my number one song “The Assissin’sTango”. You better ask somebody about this baby! Its off the chain. I am in love with Brad Pitt. Brad’s and Angelina Jolie’s chemistry in this movie is nothing like I had ever seen. I hate that Brad and Jennifer broke up, but I don’t think that she can mess with this chemistry. I mean I’ve seen this movie at the movies, but now that I own it I have seen it about 3 times or more just at home. This movie is sexy and smart!

Me and Lori went to dinner last night at Texas Road House, we needed to hook up and chat. We use to work together, and she is ready to get serious about God. So she called me and we made dinner plans. I need to keep in touch with my friends, it should be that way. I don’t call people that much and I need to do it often. She has a new friend, he sounds like he’s a keeper. Go head Lori!

Neisha is cool, Nell is over, Im off tomorrow,. Im closing for now, so see ya later.

Lacrease

Pearls of Wisdom

Pearlsofwisdom@msngroups.com

 
Tyler Perry’s
Madea’s Family Reunion~ Feb 24, 06
Learn dignity.
Demand respect

God in the lady, A New Year, God is there

 

Hey its me Lacrease, well no body else better not be here.

 
Yesterday at work I was looking at this lady and I saw God in her. I bust out laughing, she didnt know tho, but I saw God. Not his face, or his lips in the flesh, but in the spirit. I can’t even explain it. Hopefully I can later on during this journey.
 
I wasnt feeling well again today, so I got up and cleaned up my room. Its funny to cause I use to be soooo junky. But now my room has got to stay cleaned. My bathroom , kitchen, and living and dining room. Dont get me wrong now. credog can be very junky baby, but I like how quick I am to get up and do something about it.
 
We are about to come into a new year, and there are some things that I need to work on. I need God so very much, cause I just seem to not be able to do it without him. There is so much in me that I want to do this year, things to accomplish, and things to do that will gloryfy God. Pearls of Wisdom is going to be great I feel it. We are going to do things next year that is going to surprise us as we look back at our rocky beginning.
 
I have been talking to my friends like I promised myself. I’m happy about that, but I have to call my friend Shaun , Michelle, and Sharron.
 
Guess I dont have too much to write about right now. God is always there.
 
Lacrease

 

ATl. Tyler Perry. Tithes, True friends

Hello blog! haha I like that name….blog.
Well today was a goodday. My sister came home from her week cruise with her husband and our God sisters Vikki and Tammy and Vikki’s boyfriend Mark. They are going back next year and is taking the kids with them. I cant go this time of year because my job is so demanding at Christmas time. Its cool tho. But I am going to ATL July 17-24 2006. I hope to meet Tyler Perry while Im there. Gloria and her family is having a family reunion that month and I plan to go there if time permits. I need to start booking my flight when I get my income tax return in January. If I go head and get that over with, then the rest will be a peace of cake. I will only have to  worry about the hotel room we are staying in, car fare, and spending money. So this year I am going to really see how responsible I am with money. I can spend money just like that, it dont make no sense how careless I am with money.
 
Starting with my first check in Jan, I am going to start tithing. When I do a budget with my bills I am going to include my tithes in that too. For example if my check is $602.00 I am going to count in $60.00 tithes, $50.00 for my phone bill and $200.00 for rent. I am going to included my tithes as a number one bill. God wants to bless me so bad I can feel it, but he wont do nothing with me when I am not doing right and I know better. No way!
 
I think that I am going to join weight watchers the beginning of the year. I am not doing right. I think a supposrt system would help me out . I need friends who are trying to lose weight like me. I dont want talk to friends, or people who want to go and eat. I need to have people in my life who are mainly focused on losing weight. I am praying that I will do it, instead of just writing about it.
Summer of 2006, I dont plan on being this size. I just dont Im sorry. I am going ATL to meet the ladies of Pearls of Wisdom and I want to be looking good. Plus what if I get a chance to meet Tyler Perry. Even if I dont be the size I want to be, at least I will be feeling good at the accomplishments. You feel me?
 
I talked to my gurl Lori, and Gloria today for a long time. I have been neglecting my friends, people who really love me and should have been done with me because I dont call them at all, or the way that I should. I am going to the movies with Gloria on Sunday and I am going to meet Lori for dinner after Church on Sunday also. So lets see how things work out.
 
I am about to lay off those pops. Today was my last day drinking them babies. they blow me up so bad. I am soooooo through with them. I am going back to how it was before. I am going to pick the weekends only when I  can have a pop. Its going to be once a week. It is so not good for me. I feel terriable when I drink pops, my stomach feels so funny. So if you are reading. please pray for me.
 
Well, Im going to close for now, be good pray and know that God loves you.
 
Lacrease J. Walker
 
 

God, home

Hey Journal!

  I know Im wrong for not writting in here daily like I should. I am so not good with being consistant. I am learning to get back on track after I am off. I noticed that when I do write in my journals on line that I think more of doing right, and it keeps me focus and more motivated to write.

 

I have to get back on track with my pop habits. I am really addicted to pop but its sure easy to get off and stay off, but I need to have a plan of how often I do drink it. Sometimes I am not paying attention to myself and end up with a pepsi or coke. But I do notice about myself, I dont bring home pops or even buy them on my off days. Only at work. Hmmm what a pattern huh?

 

Its about to be a new year ( again) and still I havent lost any weight. I am going out of town to meet my Pearls of Wisdom sisters in July and I need to lose some weight for real. I am going to join Weight Watchers and attend the weekly meetings, maybe I can meet some new people and stay motivated this time.

 

Today at work, Celeste came through my line and told me that God said for me to hold on, its coming, have faith. I didnt know what she was talking about too much, but then she said……..you have faith in limited things. And I was like yeah, then she said you want a house dont you? not a mortage, but a house. And that blew me away. Because I do have little faith in big things. I feel that I cant have a million dollar house, or a truck sitting up in my drive way. I dont want a car, I want a truck. I am going to get my truck. Sometimes I feel that the only way to get a truck and this house that I see in my mind, is for me to play a lottery and hit it big instead of believing God for it. I feel as if I have to help him, get what I want. Aint that deep to think. God owns everything we have, and I somehow feel that I NEED TO HELP HIM! Lord, forgive me because my thoughts know no better. Please forgive me. And I know God said that to her because this morning I was thinking as I always do, thinking about being in this house that me Na and Peedie went to see last year. And that house has been in my mind for the longest. This house was so beautiful and so huge. I always said that I dont want to live in a big house because its spooky. That was only satan trying to limit me to believing what I want. See I can see things for me, but for some reason I can’t see myself living in a big house with a truck in my driveway with my name on it. It seems unreal for me to be able to have something as nice. But you know I am going to work on that, because for God to tell Celeste that, he must want me to pray and ask for faith in areas that I cant see myself in. He must have a house and truck for me, because why would he tell her that? And that morning before I even went to work I was thinking about a house. Not for rent, but a house here in Michigan.

 

For now on Im going to start thinking more of my house. Im going to start planning for my house. See this is not just a house, its a home thats in my mind, that has been there for the longest. This is a home that I would consider “NOT” for Lacrease. For the reason being is that I am not married. I work at Walmart. I am a single parent not making much at all. I feel that this is not for me, no matter what my situation is now. But you know what? Aint gonna be like that no more. Naw, Im planning now what I am going to keep and give away in this house. I am giving away all this stuff, because God is making room for me to have more than this.

 

This home in my mind is so beautiful, so peaceful, and it wont leave me. God put that house on my mind before work for a reason, because as I was ringing Celeste up, she just read me. It was so unreal.  To me that was conformation that God wants me to take him of this “limited” box. He wants me to have more faith in him. I so get it. Celeste didnt know that this house was on my mind this morning. Ok I know Im going back and forth on this, but Im tripping on this for real.

 

Blitz day was yesterday and it was off th chain! I worked 4:15-1:30 time FLEW……………OK? It flew! I went home and slept for 5 hours. I was tieddddddd.

 

Well, im bout to close for now, I will talk to you tomorrow Journal.

Lacrease

 

Blitz Day

Today was a very good day. My coworker KiKi stay the night with me, because we had to be there at 4 am this morning. Today was Blitz Day (Black Friday) the official Holiday kick off of the season. It was so cold outside I didn’t think any one was going to be there. When we pulled up in the parking lot this morning, I couldn’t believe my eyes. People was everywhere. When LP opened the doors to the stores today, people ran in, walked in, pushed in, fought in, and went to their favorite merchandise to buy for themselves, family and friends, It was so exciting to see them run in the store that way they did. We clapped and cheered them on. Its a feeling that I must have in my system on the day after Thanksgiving.

 

Walmart had a lot of sales too. For all the prices they didn’t beat they compared them to other stores and challenged the customers to shop at Walmart for anything. Time went fast too. When it was time for my first break 3 whole plus hours later, I didn’t realize time had went by so quickly.

 

I got off work at 1:30. I flew out of that place. I was so sleepy on my lunch break that I took me a hot nap, and that carried me to my last 2 hours and 15 minutes. Then soon as I got back on my register, there was a page over head for a gray malibu and a Danali truck to move. They page a hundred times for me and Ki Ki to realize that we had to go outside round back to move our vehicles. That burned some time, I took my last break, got      back on for a hot 15 and that gurl they call Credog was OUT! I  was tiiiiiiiiiiiiiied!

 

Yesterday I spent Thanksgiving with my family at my sisters house. It was cool too. We had everything for dinner, plus I was with my family and I was good to go.

 

Today when I for home from work Charlene called mee. She had her cousin on the phone who is addicted to Walmart. Her and Charlene told me that they went to Walmart on 23 mile and cleaned house. Im so happy for Charlene cause she wanted that Sponge Bob and Dora The Explorer TV and VCR combo for $98.00, She got it and Im happy for her.

 

I got to thinking about me and Charlene’s friendship. And no matter how often we talk ott how many days in between we dont talk, she is really my best friend for now and always. I love Charlene. She is a Leo and I so understand her. We dont always agree but she is my true friend and I am so happy to have known her. WE are adults we disagree in adult ways. If she aint feeling me we automaticly shut the conversation down before it goes to far, I love that about her, and then we talk about it later. Have it always been that way NO! We use to argu like cats and dogs, but if we had to go through that to be where we are today…………….I’ll do it again. She is one of the few people that I love and trust.

 

Lord Thank you for a true friend for over 18 years. Lord thank you for Charlene Weathers-Hayes for being a real friend over the years.

 

Lacrease

 

 

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

A Personal Relationship With God

Image
 

Today is a nice day. My bestfriend Gloria came over to see me, she says the reason why we don’t go out any more is because of this computer. rofllllllll Well she’s right. I love this computer and the things that it brings.
 
Today I went to the grocery store and I was so nice to the customers and the cashiers. Not because its my neighborhood grocery store but because I wasn’t at work I guess. I don’t know. But I love that other side of Lacrease. I love her.
 
Lord, thank you for convicting me when I am wrong. I know sometimes I act stubborn and don’t want to do right, but thanks for letting me hear your voice. Yesterday at work we were in the lunch room having our normal God talks, and we were discussion how does a person know your voice.
 
 I told Mona my coworker, when you are in the grocery store and you are on one side of the building and one of your kids are on the other. I said if your daughter calls from across the store, you will know her voice. I said you will be able to tell if your child is in trouble, if she just want to know where you are in the store, even if she wants something. The point is by spending time with your child daily you can easily distinguish her/his voice from anyone that is calling out to you.
 
That’s how it is with God. If you spend time with him daily by having conversations with him, laughing with him, listening to him, and most important reading his word~ The Bible.  That’s how you will know his voice when he speaks to you. That’s called a personal relationship.
 
Its very important in the world today, people are going through things and they don’t even need too. Its because they don’t have any one to turn too. God is always there, but guilt keeps people from wanting to worship him. You can be just burned out of your house, no gas, no lights, no clothes no coat, and because of the guilt you are feeling from not having a relationship with him, will effect you when you really need him. And even though he will never turn his back on you, you still feel that you haven’t built up enough communication to even pray.
 
Start today, start talking, start looking for him, speak to him, allow him to convict you when you are wrong, and allow room in your life for a personal relationship with him today. Don’t just say it, don’t just know it, BUT DO IT!
 
LaCrease

You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.

-James D. Miles

Church, My freinds and God

Hello Lord,

         It seems so funny that I am talking to you public. I want to thank you for another day. Yes, another day. Did I go to Church today? No. I didn’t. I am going to be going back real soon, and this time Im going to be lead by you. Ive tried too many times, then 5 weeks later, Im a drop out.

 

I cant be back and forth. Im use to going to Church and then going to the programs afterwards. I am going to change my life. God wants me to do right. I can feel it. He wants me to do great things, and speak to women who is hurting all over the world. And if I can’t get myself up to go to Church how is people going to look at me?

 

Lord, I know I need to sit down and write my daddy a letter. I know that its important to do that. I know it is. Its funny how many things that we need to be doing now, and not later.

 

Lord, I want to pray for my friends. Lori, Niya, Daneisha, Kia, Eddie, Terrell, Tiffany, Keisha, and my gurl Tasha. Those are my friends that always ask about me, while Im too busy telling them to call me back. Lord, Im going to try my best to serve my friends and be there for them when they need to talk or visit me.

 

Lord, you know how much I love Anita Baker, Gerald Levert, and you have made it possible for me to meet them. You know my heart the day it was broke when I went to NY. So then I met Gerald and then Anita Baker. So Lord, you know I want to meet Tyler. Please Lord let it happen for me. Lord, please let it happen for me.

 

Well im closing for now, and Im going to do some work for the Pearls right quick. So I will talk to you tomorrow.

 

Matter of fact, Im going to share some of the things you did for me.

 

I Love you Lord,

Lacrease

 

 

 

You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.

-James D. Miles

Rapist thoughts, and the new Lacrease

Hey.

Lord Thank you for another day. Another day I said. Another day. How are you doing Lord?

Today was a good day for me, time went pretty quick at work, and then I went home.

I must admit God I am a Church drop out. I was going real good a few months ago, then I dropped back out. Thats not good at all. I know Lord, that I need to go ever Sunday and not when Im not tired from work or dont feel like it. I want that same feeling I had when I went to Church a year straight without missing a Sunday. I miss that.

Lord, I havent spoken to my dad for a very long time now. Its been at least a month. He told me not to go to his funeral when he dies. Aint that something deep to tell your own child. Where does that kind of angry roots? How could you think this thought to even tell you own child? Is that hate? I told my dad, if I didnt love God so much, I would tell you off. I told him that. I could never ever in a million years tell Neisha, when I die dont come to my funeral. You have to be hurting, and hating yourself to even let those words come out of your mouth.

 

Welp,  my so called boyfriend who raped me and took my vaginity at 17 will be out of jail soon, before the year is out. For some reason I feel he is already out. I dont know the real reason why he is locked up, but I stilll havent forgotten what he did to me. I still think about that night as if it was “tonight”. He left me bleeding and cold that night in July or August. It was almost my birthday. I was saving myself. I dissed him after that. Do you know that when he saw me he had the nerve to say “Why didnt you tell me you was on your period.”? I didnt scream when he was doing it, I was just so shocked. My daddy would have killed him on the spot. I still think that I did the right thing by not screaming, I dont want my dad in jail, cause thats where he would have end up. My dad dont play about his kids. He dont play.

 

God sometimes I want to ask you questions. How could you know that this was happening to me and not do anything? How can I help someone when I cant get over it myself? What am I suppose to learn from this? Why is he still living and doing the same thing to other women? God please dont let me look up and see him in my line when he gets out of jail. He is going to ask about me, because of the people we know that I am still in contact with. I was molested by a babysitter. He is in jail and I hope he is never getting out. He is there for life, but heard that could change. Lord, dont let him get out. I dont want that rapist to get out of jail, but since he is, dont let me see him again, and especially in Walmart.

 

Lord, I know tomorrow Im going to read this entry and ask myself what in the would was I thinking to post this. Well maybe it needs to be out of me and into the world. Who knows.

 

For many years I was content with being  heavy.  I felt that if I am heavy less attention I would get. That is foolish thinking and not true. Today I am a new woman, I want to be pretty, and I deserve to be happy. I am on a journey to lose this weight and be the woman God has called me to be. Thats enough with all these lies satan has feed me all these years. I am going to be healthy and beautiful all at the same time.

 

Well, guess I go and cry.

Crease