As the days go by I am reminded by God to take deep breaths as he continue to work with me on my Anger issues. I am not afraid to declare this issue of mines. As a matter of fact, it has helped me to STAY CONSCIENCE of arising situations that causes me to speak on a matter when nothing needs to be said.
This morning, I was having a moment when I wanted to comment on a post on FB that was a result of what I posted on yesterday. Instead of commenting on my post, this person made their own . I wanted so badly to comment.. but I know me… I don’t just comment…. I CAN SHUT THE WHOLE STAT DOWN….no curse words…. just TRUTH. But God asked me… “must you fight off all fools Cree”? He said now, you either continue reading and NOT COMMENT…. or totally disconnect… chose one? LOL LOL
He also revealed to me another reason why I have this issue with anger. He reminded me that when we were coming up as teens, me, my brother plus 2 sisters. We had real true friends. Our porch was the one everybody came to sit at EVERYDAY. To this day we still have the same friends… all of them are still in our lives after 32-35 years… everyone is still alive. WE never talked about each other, we never turned on each other, we all loved each other and people saw that in our friendships. We didn’t fight each other AT ALL.. PERIOD…. NEVER EVER.. AT ALL. NOT ONCE. We argued and debated but we were cool everyday. And so, this mentality of how I view friends took me over into my adult years. I went to a Wrap and Wine party this past Saturday at my good friend Gloria’s house. I met 10 women… not one thing I had to say about any of them when I left. You know how when you leave a function, or gathering, and there is something to be said negative about someone… anyone…. I’m not use to that type of mentality. So, I’m like okay God.. how does this tie into me? Well, that’s one of my triggers. When people ALWAYS have negative things to say about others. I don’t like that.
Now I am silly… If I’m out to dinner with some friends, and one of them are throwing down on some food and its a silly moment.. I may say something stupid like…. OOO chile you putting that fork da WORK BABY!!! LOL But everybody knows I’m silly and will expect for me to say it. Now…… if that person is not riding home with me, and I’m with others that was there….. I may hit back on that subject, in a funny NON OFFENDING WAY. And its going to be something said that I would say to THAT person I’m speaking about. I wouldn’t DARE go call up another person and talk and bring it up. That’s childish to me, and its drama filled. But to say… oooo that dress she had on was a mess, or she know she was busting out. WE * * just don’t disrespect our friendships like that. As friends we don’t talk about each other, if we offend, we talk, debate, and kiss and make up on the spot. I don’t sit at the table with folks who I will talk about, and dog out when I’m not in their presence.
NOW, I SAY THAT TO SAY….. I am offended by the way people today just totally talk down to each other, diss, curse, and are ready to fight each other these days. We allow so many people to “geek” us up to go with the popular, that we don’t even realize that its going to hurt us in the long run. This type of disrespectful behavior gets into my soul and breaks me down. Why even be around people you have to discuss and talk about? What point is that? I’m just saying people, … we have to do better with our energy. I’m so happy that I’m learning my triggers. So let me name them…. BULLIES, PEOPLE WHO TALK ABOUT OTHERS IN A MALICE AND MALICIOUS way, people who are RUDE.. and folks who DO NOT KNOW/CARE TOO… HOW TO TALK TO ANOTHER PERSON in a respectful tone. But….. I’ve been doing soooooooooo good… yeaaaaaaaa. I’m proud of myself. Chat layta.
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy