So, I just finished watching Kandi’s Wedding. I’m just outdone by the disrespect and the lack of common sense used. I see clearly the drama that will eventually end in divorce if Kandi don’t get a grip of her mothers behavior. It kills me to see her going through this and not have a clue to how to stop her mother for just saying whatever she wants to say. My daddy is the same way, took me forever to learn how to deal with him. I’m so glad that I learned it before I got married.
Kandi has to say: Momma, I understand that you don’t too much care for Todd. I get that. So for now on to respect how you feel, I will ask you NOT to ask me about him, and I will NOT bring up his name. Not only that, but since you feel this way, I would appreciate if you NOT discuss him with anyone else, because I would hate to HEAR that you’re mentioning his name to anyone when you’ve expressed the way you feel. I feel that if you’re not feeling a person, then their name should never come out of your mouth.
I know and understand that Kandi have hope that each time she brings up Todd’s name that her mom would eventually come around…its not going to happen unless she tries something different. Its not even important why Momma Joyce feels the way she does, what’s important is that Kandi “gets it” before Todd gets fed up. I understand that she looks at her mother as her best-friend…. I get that. But some of the things that Momma Joyce says about Todd is disrespectful and unacceptable. If Todd at A N Y T I M E feel that its gone to far, and feels that he can’t talk to Kandi as his best-friend and his WIFE …. there is no telling where this marriage will end. A man/woman can only take so much in a relationship when they’re not being heard.
Kandi needs to get a grip of what’s going on here with her mom disrespecting Todd ( her husband) in the way that she does, she’s going to lose him. I’m going to say this- When a man feels the need to TALK and VENT with someone who “understands” even if it means meeting a new woman who totally can be a friend without being in his immediate circle… he will. Todd goes out of town a lot early in the marriage, while she’s in Atlanta.. and if she’s calling him “filling” him in on what’s “said” and its drama from her mom, he’s going to eventually get tired of it. At some point, he’s going to feel that he needs to “talk” with that person who loves to listen and understand. That’s how outside relationships start. Those talks are going to show him that he’s in a marriage that will always be filled with drama. If he ever decides to leave Kandi. he will NOT fight for anything monetary or”stuff” (( material things)), he will walk away with his FREEDOM AND PEACE OF MIND…… and what can beat that? My prayer is that Kandi… get it. I just love Todd for her… and I love me some Kandi as well.
Listen to yourself and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God. – Dr. Maya Angelou