Relationship Choices….Cree’s Blog Entry

ImageI was talking to my Male BFF and he was telling me about his relationship with his on and off again gurlfriend of 8 years. He introduced me to her soon as they met, and I really like her a lot. She’s a very nice gurl. She in boxed me yesterday, told me that he told her that we had a conversation about their relationship. She asked me for some advice. Of course he called me the next day asking what advice did I give her. LOL * and you know I told him everything*
 
 
I love my Male BFF, but baby when I say he’s selfish….. BELIEVE it. He has a great job as a truck driver, he LOVES his kids, was married when he had them * still not divorced* has his own place, doing very good. As long as I’ve been knowing him, he’s never had an attitude, yes he gets angry, but it only last as long as he tells the story. He’s a great person. But he’s selfish, and that’s tearing their relationship apart. I told her when she first met him this is his only issue, anything else is workable.
 
 
She’s fed up with his selfishness, and he’s fed up with her attitude. Her attitude comes from him being selfish. My advice to her was, and I want every person reading this to get it……at some point in your life, you cannot keep expecting someone to change when they have shown you * in this case 8 years* who they are in this area. This is who he is. Maybe he doesn’t see it, maybe he doesn’t agree with it, maybe he feels that since he’s a good person in all other areas * he is* that this is the one area he doesn’t want to compromise in. I told her that she CANNOT go on breaking it off, then getting together again. At some point, this gets tiring. I told her that she cannot expect for him to make a decision on what to do about their relationship… SHE HAS TO DECIDE IF THIS IS THE MAN SHE WANTS TO BE WITH. Of course he’s going to call you for sex, of course he wants to see you, of course he wants to be around you,.. but you have to make a decision with your LIFE.
 
 
When I was with my daughters dad, I was always expecting him to SAY with his MOUTH…. that we are not together. We were still having sex, he would come over and be with us all day, he would help me out whenever I needed him, we did things as if we were a couple. But when he showed me in other areas of himself that bothered me, I thought…. I’m not feeling this, and when I told him about it, I always left it up to him to decide our next level. Mann… after I realize that he could “live like that with me” FOREVER and that he didn’t have to explain anything to me, it was for me to ((((FIGURE OUT)))) I was done with him.
 
 
He had me, other women, and everything else he had built. I always felt that communication was a way of expressing how you felt. Even if we were going to be together or not. But I realize that men don’t always express themselves, they kinda “hope” that women get it. I’m not the kind of person who gets (((subliminal))) messages either. I put an end to those kinds of people who does it, trying to figure out their mess, because they had insecurities, doubt and fears of relaying a message. Subliminal messages PISSES me off to no end. At age 46 I refuse to sit up with a pen and paper and try to decipher what you’re saying. I’M NOT DOING THAT… AT ALL PERIOD… I’m not praying over it, I’m not calling people to help me figure it out, I’m not pulling out books, not calling people with Doctrine Degrees, I’m not doing any of that. You have to tell me in writing or in person exactly what you mean. The reason why, is because that’s the language I speak to others. I like to express the truth. Best thing is… I have learned to say things in a way that people “get it”, and my tone of voice is shared in a way where they’re not offended. When people ask for my advice I don’t give them 20 minutes of talk, I say what I have to say, and get right to the point. You want the person to “get it”.
 
 
Getting back to my story. I told her that she has to make a choice. We are in our 40’s, we don’t have time to go be on again and off again in a relationship. You know what you want, what you need, and what you would and wont put up with. I said don’t sit up and wait on him to make the choice for you. If you’re not happy ((( they’re both not))) keep it moving. People are scared to keep it moving these days. They don’t want to be alone. They feel that if they have invested many years in a relationship, why give it up now, even though its not working out. Women has this bad. We have to know what we want up front, and if we are not getting that, we have to be able to move on. Its Okay. Never wait for any man, situation to knock you down, before you decide (((this is NOT working))))) for me. Know what you want….. and if you’re not getting it…… KEEP IT MOVING. (((in my favorite words….. THIS TRAIN IS MOVING)))
 
 
 
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Who R U LaCrease? Part 4 *final* Cree’s Blog Entry @tylerperry

keeping my mouth shutPART 4……..    But in order to do that… I had to ask God…where did this come from? Lord, why do I get upset when someone is sharing with me a story about what someone else did to them? Why do I take it to heart so deeply? Why am I so emotionally connected to their story? Why are my insides on fire as they tell the story? Why do I even care?
I was fed up with my own behavior of trying to “fight” everyday with people about how they treat others. So, I sat down with the TV off and started asking God why am I this way? There has to be a root, where did this begin? All of a sudden I started thinking about my childhood. I was bullied in school. I was bullied because I was different and did my own thing. I admire people who do their “own thing” and not what others did….. unless they like it. If you don’t like what I do, that you wouldn’t do… don’t comment on MY stuff. My dad knew I was different too. I feel to this day that he was a major part of why I have a thing against bullies. For example. Say for instance our light bill was due tomorrow. My dad would spend the money, have fun with it, and worry about that when…. the shut off FINAL NOTICE came. Me, on the other hand, if I had a shut off notice, I would pay the bill, so that I could have PEACE, and not be in the middle of a conversation with someone laughing it up, then all of a sudden …. I THINK OF THIS LIGHT BILL THAT’S GOING TO BE SHUT OFF AT ANY MOMENT. In my daddy’s eyes, I would be considered “silly” in a BULLY FORM OF WAY for thinking like this, and for worrying way to much about it. That always bothered me. It made me feel like this…. If I did things or think things differently than you, mines is considered “STUPID” but yours is considered “SMART”. In my eyes that’s a form of “bullying”.
So, as I got older and realized that the gurl who always stayed in the house, people loved me for how different I was. I was NEVER popular in school, but when I started working and living on my own, people connected with me in a HUGE WAY. Because I was different. I stuck up for the “under dogs”. If I saw you messing with someone and they looked like they didn’t want to be apart… I would say something in a nice tone, and let you know… “we don’t do that here”. I felt that I was that voice for them, but it came from my own place when I was a child.
Then God reminded me of a time when a coworker came to me and said Cree I have something to tell you, but I have to tell you when I call you later, because I know you’re going to be mad. That right there, sent my gauge up to 100. LOL I begged her to tell me now, but she didn’t. When she told me the story later, yep I was mad.. ON FIYAH. Long story short. Me and that coworker was standing around waiting for customers, when our boss son came in. He was good looking, 4 years younger than my daughter. When my boss introduced us to him, we said “oh he’s handsome a good looking guy’… and that was the end of that. Didn’t this BOSS/MANAGER go and tell the other MANAGERS that we were all over her son, and that we were acting like “cougars”, and she also said, women like us is the reason why he don’t come up to the job. PISSED ME OFF. First of all, the lil short sawed off rut…. didn’t look like much, second of all, we both have kids who are GROWN and OLDER THAN HIM, and third of all…. we like men in their late 40’s early 50’s. WHAT?????????? So since I’m faithful to my word and friend about not mentioning anything. We both speak to the Manager, but we keep it moving….we don’t deal with her like that.
Then God bought to my remembrance about how I take up for Tyler Perry when people talk bad about him. I connect with Tyler because we share a lot of child hood issues. I love him as a brother, and a long time ago I adopted in my mind that he is just like me. People talk about him because he’s different, he do things his own way. I LOVE and ADMIRE that about him. When I take up for him, I see us as kids, and since I’m older than him. I see myself as the big sister. And NOBODY is going to talk about MY BROTHER!!! I never shared this with anyone, but when I use to read my google alerts on him and the article was bad and the comments were even worst. I would get on there and SHUT THE WHOLE BOARD DOWN… I would nut up on anyone who had anything negative to say about him. Again it goes back to my child hood, its a form of BULLYING in my mind.
One day I came across this page and this white lady was talking about Tyler, I sent her a email and this is how it went.
RE: Backstage
I am a faithful fan of Tyler Perry. As I read your post about him and read your sarcasm….. I was upset to see that you were taking shots at him. For NO reason. If you’re going to write about a story…. WRITE IT. Leave your remarks out.
But then I realized it was YOU…. who looked stupid. Lindsey had a daughter NOT a son. Trying to make Tyler look bad, you need to be FIRED. Get it together PROFESSIONAL writer.
Then she sent this back to me: Hi lacrease,My name is * took her name out* I’m sorry if my post about the Tyler Perry Foundation offended you. Until your comment I didn’t know there actually was such an organization.I’ve taken the liberty of changing the name and removing the Tyler Perry Foundation from the post but the post itself remains.I’m not against people with GID or those who opt for sexual reassignment surgery. It wasn’t my intention to offend you but I’m sorry if I did.Regards,
After doing this…. I decided that I cannot fight these BULLIES, if Tyler Perry can keep it moving, than so can I. This is what God has been showing me for the longest about myself. I’m the same way with HOMELESS people. Don’t let me hear someone talking down on them, I will have a fit. Don’t talk about anyone who is less fortunate. Don’t mis treat kids, BECAUSE THEY DO KIDS STUFF….another issue that God should me. My coworker stopped me from what I was doing and asked me to come over to her, because she had something to tell me. When I got to her, she asked me….. WHY DO YOU GIVE THESE KIDS MONEY? PISSED ME OFF. My heat Gauge went to 100. Before I knew it I started nutting up, no curse words, or loud talking… NONE OF THAT…. I basically told her that I was grown, I do what I want with my money, and that you have NO IDEA of how many people gave me money as a child and adult, and this is my pay off. That was truly the day, she became my “friend”. She got me…. she knew then that I was my OWN WOMAN in my OWN LANE, doing my OWN THING, with my OWN MIND….
Since God showed me these things about myself. I’m learning to kinda emotionally disconnect from the people I love so much. I love my family and friends. I get to tied into their story and take it to heart. I ‘ve been doing sooooo good lately. God reminds me when I’m in the middle of a test, so that I can think about it as its happening, and to pay attention to my “heat gauge”. LOL I can listen to a story and not be so quick to get upset, or offer my “opinion” about it so quickly. I realize that God is in control and that I don’t have to “mentally fight” off bullies, and take up for the underdog, or hear a story and get upset about it, because its a LIE, MEAN, BULLYISH, or GOSSIP. I’m learning to “keep it moving”. I don’t have to take up for my Brother Tyler Perry who I LOVE so dearly anymore. He can handle his own affairs, and people are going to say what they want about him and everybody else too. I have gotten emails and DM from people who ask me…. do you see Tyler Perry for your husband? LOL I laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh at them, I can see no further than me and he as kids, being different and trying to make it. I couldn’t understand it myself, until God should me the connection.
 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/31/syleena-johnson-iyanla-vanzant_n_3677969.html I was watching Fix My Life with Syleena Johnson and when she asked why she still feels this way about her mom Iyanla replied :”because when you were a little person the big people were behaving badly… and then you grow up…. but you never shifted your relationship with those big people… so in your life she’s still a big person bullying you… and your response is that of a 4 year old… you ever learned how else to be. THAT WAS MY BREAKTHROUGH……THAT WAS THE MOMENT I GOT IT…. I AM A GROWN WOMAN… FIGHTING AS A CHILD IN MY ADULT MIND AND LIFE. TELL ME SOMEBODY GOT THAT? That video is ME FROM THE BEGINNING TO THE END! ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME. THIS WAS MY BREAKTHROUGH.
Everyday there is a test for me…. I have to be open at all times for the warning…. hey maybe there will be times when God doesn’t warn me. LOL I know him…. there will be those times. But the bigger picture here is that I WANT to be a better person, and yes I love my family and friends, but I have to emotionally disconnect from the issues, not to make it mines, to not take on the emotionally responsibility of fixing the issue. But at the same time continue to help them out in anyway I can, * I love talking to people* but not to make it mines.
Thanks for reading, and please learn from MY Life Lessons.
Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Feeling some kinda way….about him.. Cree’s Blog Entry!

2013-07-1220.05.30I have a lot that I could speak on when it comes to the Zimmerman case, but I’m very vocal on Twitter so I’ll just leave it at that.

 

I knew once I was on my own I would make myself more available to dating and getting to know someone nice. I can’t even count the men that I have met in the last 6 months. None of them made it inside my apartment, and it never went as far as a kiss.

 

 

But this one guy… um um um….. I liked him… I mean I really liked him. I really thought my “like” button was broke, because I always knew what kind of man I wanted, and I just wasn’t coming across him. We saw each other 5 times a week, and talked on the phone between both his jobs. I would sit at his job in my building * he was the boss* for hours, he never wanted me to leave. We got attached to each other real quick. But one day…. when I walked up to him for the first time that day… he stared me in the eyes and said… I talked to God about you last night….* and then he told me what God told him*… he said to me, when this happen don’t forget about me. I was so shocked at what he said.. I just stood there in a frozen blizzard and stared at him. He was like… are you alright… what? I couldn’t even talk… I changed the subject and when I got to my apartment I got in the bathtub and started thinking about it. Just then he called and said Cree are you okay? What did I say so shocking? I played it off again, and we hung up.

 

Right then and there I knew he wasn’t the one for me, I knew that he was ONLY in my life to give me that message. I KNEW that my days of being with and around him were numbered. GOD KNEW that in order for me to even BELIEVE the message , was that  I HAD TO HAVE SOME KIND OF FEELINGS/CONNECTION  to HIM to even give him the time of day. I do NOT put any energy into a man who I have ABSOLUTELY no feelings for…. its time consuming and relationship/friendship suicide.

 

The reason why I would never get serious with him, was because he was in the “process” of getting himself together, and had several “when he had time” relationships. I was not looking for that at all. I also noticed that when we would talk, several other women came around, and as a woman I knew that he was attracted to them as well as to me. One person in particular… I knew he had eyes for. She couldn’t wait until I left so that she could get her few hours in… LOL it was all good, because I knew he wasn’t the one for me, but his presence, personality, conversations, beautiful teeth and smile… ALWAYS made me happy.

 

He’d applied for another job, and had gotten it. I knew my days of not seeing him were numbered when he shared that info with me. He worked 2 full time jobs and lived too far for us to see each other even once a week. I was sad and stopped calling him. He would call me all the time and ask why you never call me anymore. I couldn’t take not seeing him like I was use too. I was wrong, but I had to disconnect from him. I just stopped answering  his calls, and stop calling him. This was in April or May.

 

Yesterday……… as I stepped out of my van and was walking through my gated parking lot. I felt “something”.. I cant even explain what it was, but it was a weird feeling. It was so weird that I decided to scan the parking lot to see was someone following me… it wasn’t even 6pm yet, and it  doesn’t get dark until after 9. As I’m walking towards my building…. I spot HIM AND her…..looking at me as they walk to the car. Yea… the gurl, the “one in particular”. She lives here in my building. My heart was racing when I saw him because it caught me  totally off guard. I wasn’t mad or anything…. I JUST KNEW WHAT I KNEW. I knew they liked it each other, and I know they’re together.

 

I guess the point I’m making is…. I’m still feeling some kinda way about seeing him… and THEM TOGETHER.I really really liked him. I haven’t liked a guy like that in over 10 years. I’m very funny about giving my heart, time and Love to anyone. I have to really know you, and be with you, to know how I feel. And God knew this. But he had to get that message to me… and I got it. But back in the day, baaaaaaby…..as soon as I put that key into the door, I would have been calling him *not caring one thing about what they are to each other* saying……. COME TO MY APARTMENT TONIGHT AT 8. BE HERE!!!! LOL But I’m 45 and I KEEPS IT MOVING…..The one for me is still out there!!! 🙂

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Behind the Scenes~ Your child at school.. *Parents must read* Crees Blog Entry

hpqscan0001Behind the Scenes~ Your Kids at School

 

When Neisha was growing up… it use to irritate me so bad the NUMBER OF TIMES I had to tell her that when she leaves from spending the night out, to make sure she pack up all her clothes and personal things. She would ALWAYS come home without SOMETHING. For the life of me, I couldn’t understand why she wasn’t “getting it” after the first 10 times of me yelling.

 

 

What I realized is THAT….. Its a must YOU TELL your KIDS THE SAME THING OVER, AND OVER, AND OVER, AND OVER, AND OVER, AND OVER until you are BLUE in the face. Kids just don’t get it hearing it once. I GET THAT NOW. It’s okay….it really is.

 

 

I have to tell the same kids over and over and over… “go to your class” “Stop playing in the hall”… “leave that gurl alone” “pick up your mess”. “pull your pants up”, “stop cussing”, “throw your tray away”, “stop playing so much”. And at one point I said God.. why do I have to tell the same kids the same thing over and over and over again? He said to me…. how many times do I STILL have to tell you….. to slow down, be patient, take your time, listen, make sure the door is locked, get gas before you go to work, make sure you have your keys, put your license back in your wallet before you lose it, turn your head lights off, make sure the stove is off before leaving the house. I can go on and on. I just smiled when I heard all these things that I CONSTANTLY need to be told to do.

 

 

The BIG PICTURE is this….. No matter how tired you get of telling your kids something over and over and over again…. understand you just may have too. We are people and its in us to be told something OVER AND OVER AGAIN. Also know there maybe something’s, that you’re only willing to tell your child only once. One thing Neisha knew I wasn’t going to repeat myself was, when, I told her to come here. She always came right away, because she knew that was something I didn’t want to tell her twice about. I can hear you saying to your kids “clean up your room” wash your plate out when you finish eating, pickup your clothes behind you, wash your hands, take this garbage out, do your homework, do your chores, be in by curfew. I realized that WE’RE ALL WIRED UP to be told over, and over, and over, and over again to do the thing we know to do.

 

 

Guess what? The same things you’re telling your kids at home …. when they come to school the next day…. ITS MY TURN. #idontmindatall

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Virgo Men

msvirgocreefameHmmm just something I found interesting. I met a Virgo in my parking lot last week. I dated a Virgo man in the past, and he was weird. We always argued, and he always showered me with gifts.. .THEN WANTED THEM BACK. I’ve met several Virgo men lately, and I need to understand why they all seem to be alike. This is the best piece yet I found on line by someone name Lisa… on a VIRGO MAN.

 
Virgo Men

I have to say, out of all the signs in the zodiac this one is the most perplexing in a relationship. Virgo men are incredibly critical when it comes to themselves and that will spill over to their ,relationships. I have never met, nor read for a Virgo male that was happy in their current state. Living for the moment is NOT their strong suit and their minds are so hyper analytical they create more problems for themselves and their lovers than solutions.

A Virgo male is what I like to call “fire and ice”. When they have an interest in a woman they believe in courting her. They may not have even spoken to her yet, but through his observations he has “summed up” just whom he thinks she is. He has created little scenario’s in his mind, and he’s begun to write a script of the relationship that hasn’t even started yet. He will woo her, be attentive, listen intently to all she says, taking notes and remembering fine details of all she says. He is a gentleman in every sense of the word. This man will make you feel as though you are not only the only woman in the room but the only woman on the planet as well. He’s known for luxury, comfort and fine things. He will open car doors, pull out your chair, order for you, and even gingerly feed her ice cream. He will call the next day, send texts wishing you a “good morning”, and he will be highly romantic. He sounds like dream come true. But remember, everyone has a shadow side and this man’s shadow side is the complete opposite. Remember, I stated he has an analytical mind and he will over analyze and blow up even the tiniest of things.

Once the courtship is solidified and the relationship cemented and this man feels secure that you belong to him he begins to unravel it. He will dissect every aspect of the relationship, not so much to pick YOU apart, but because of his own critical nature of the self he tends to find fault with a great deal. He idealizes so many things, and you are NOT sticking to the script he wrote of your love affair that he tends to manipulate it so it follows said script. He will stop with compliments and now he will give “helpful suggestions” which sound a lot like demands and dissection of your entire character. He can be brutal with this and it can and will be wounding. Mostly it’s wounding because before you could do no wrong, you were perfect, and now he’s finding fault with everything.

The more you try to please this man, the more you will fail. He likes independent, yet domestic women. He loves sensuality, but not overtly sexual women. He loves a great sense of humor, but never at his expense. You must be intelligent, self sufficient and someone who is strong, yet he wants to be needed. He’s a walking, talking contradicition. This is a man who wants it all, and he will refuse to settle for less. This is why most Virgo men tend to marry very late in life, or not at all.

Once you begin the tragic circle of jumping through hoops to mold, shift and change for him, he will lose a great deal of respect for you. He may become enraged when you stand ground, but I will tell you he will respect you for it. You never want to lose the respect of Virgo, for once you do, you lose their attention.

CONTROL should be a the middle name of a Virgo male. And many times in an effort to control aspects of their own lives they, in turn, attempt to control aspects of yours, though they don’t see it this way. It’s their life, you happen to be part of it, therefore you are subjected to their insatiable need for such control. That is how they view it. When you express your desires, needs, and wants, they will fulfill them only if it fits into what they want for their own lives. They appear to be very black and white thinkers, but I will tell you that under the surface you will never find another sun sign that worries, stresses or fears the worst than a Virgo male. Their minds are constantly working on a problem, but their actions in fixing said problem in a relationship are limited, and if they can get YOU TO CHANGE instead of changing themselves they will always choose that option. They don’t see what they are doing most of the time and how they have the ability to truly damage their lovers self esteem.

Virgo men are loyal, despite the bad reputation they may have earned. These men crave attention but the attention they crave is one that they are successful, helpful, respected, etc. It’s not really of a shallow nature, though their vanity does tend to get in their way, and Virgo men embrace aging much like a fading movie star sitting in a botox chair…the fight it every step of the way. But in relationships, they may give you the illusion he has other options, and he may, but he is highly selective and may be venturing into more of an emotional or mental affair more so than a physical one. They don’t bed a bevvy of women for instant gratification, there has to be more to it than sex for a virgo male.

They are also creatures of habit. I find them to be very predictable and ending relationships is not their strong suit. They tend to do so in a cut and dry manner, they shut down, withdraw and silence. They won’t return your calls, nor your texts, but they won’t tell you to “get lost” either. They tend to hold onto the past as they may regret their decision and want to revisit it. They are notorious for having explosive break ups, turning a tiny disagreement into a full blown brawl. They walk out, fall silent but make no mistake they are so sure of your love for them they will wait by that phone for the apology they feel they so richly deserve (even if they started the battle). As time goes by and you are not calling they become even more angry, bitter and resentful. But, and this is a big but, they are also known to reappear without warning, and attempting to discuss the issue long after you’ve moved on and forgotten about it. This causes many women bewilderment and they cannot figure out what the game plan is here. Is he trying to reconcile? Did he miss me? What’s he doing? What he’s doing is seeking validation that you are still waiting for him, and if you give him that, you will be placed back up on that shelf to collect dust only to be taken down and played with whenever he needs to feel secure again. It’s a horrible catch 22.

What keeps a woman going back to a virgo man is when he’s good he’s amazing. But when he’s bad he’s the most heartbreaking of men. He can make you feel alive, desired and wanted beyond measure, then with icy silence cut you off and make you feel utterly disposable. I wish I could tell you he wasn’t aware he’s doing this, but he’s well aware of it, and he’s so caught up in his own emotions, wants, needs and desires that yours aren’t even on his mind.

The best way to deal with a Virgo male in a love relationship is to be honest, up front and stand for your beliefs. If he insults or wounds you try to remove emotion from it and speak matter of factly. Emotions don’t hold a lot of weight and he’ll see you as out of control. Be very direct and state your case. If he tries to engage in battle walk away! Don’t engage. It won’t be pretty because this man will pull out all the ammo in an effort to win this battle. He’ll bring up your drunken mother, you’re cheating ex, and how you need dental work. There is nothing off limits when this man wants to attack. Fight the urge to retort. If he starts to get nasty, walk away and tell him you’ll discuss it when he’s not being so immature. A Virgo male hates to feel in inferior and when YOU are the more rational one he will stop his antics. If you insult him back not only will it get worse, but you will pay for it for weeks, perhaps months. They are like elephants, they never forget.

Secondly, don’t give this man ultimatums. He doesn’t respond to them, and if forced to move faster than he’s comfortable with he will retreat and leave you behind wondering WTF?

Remember, he is an earth sign. He does not move fast with anything. This man is cautious, meticulous, a perfectionist, a bit OCD, high worrier, and critical. He takes great time and care doing every task from buying a home, marriage proposal to making a sandwich. It can be maddening especially if you’re a fire sign and move quickly and follow your intuition. This man questions himself constantly so he won’t move in haste. He is always looking for a better option, and he’s frugal. He loves fine things, and may blow 10K on a gadget that is of quality rather than settle for something cheaper to do the trick. He’s a hard worker, but he has spouts of it. He’ll work non stop for 3 months without a break, then crash from exhaustion and hibernate cutting off everything and everyone to recharge. He doesn’t give a warning, he just retreats, again leaving you wondering if you did something wrong. Only to reappear without excuse, apology or explanation.

The best way to get along well with a Virgo male is to allow him the space he needs to do what he needs to do. Only lend advice when it’s asked for (he doesn’t take advice well). Stay true to your desires, for if you work your life around this man you will forever be doing so. Set boundaries with him. If he crosses a line with you, tell him blankly, and stick to it. He will challenge your boundaries. Be authentic. He won’t appreciate a dishonest, phoney person. The best advice I can give is know who you are, know what you want, what you stand for and what you will NOT tolerate, because if you go into a relationship with a Virgo male and you are seeking validation and/or expecting him to make you a secure person you will end up worse off than you were before.

Blessings, Lisa

#VIRGO #VIRGOS VIRGOS!!!!! Cree’s Blog Entry!!!

blurrymeI use to be deep into signs in my 20’s, these days every now and then I’ll find myself reading something on line about Virgos. I find the things that people say about us to be so true….some folks need to #tryagain.

I found some interesting post on line *Virgo Woman by GaneshaSpeaks.com , I want to share them and respond. My comments are about me, but you can learn a lot about yourself or someone you know or date.

The Virgo women’s greatest assets are their intelligence, analytical minds and excellent memory. They are logical thinkers who would take any into account every detail before arriving at a decision. Therefore, they are good at settling disputes and make good business partners, analysts and strategists. I do remember a lot, but I take in so much from myself and others, that I don’t believe I remember a lot. But maybe its true for things I WANT TO REMEMBER. LOL Yes, I think about everything!!! That’s why I’m a great planner. I can plan something, and think of the smallest detail in making it happen. When I do my Feeding the Homeless projects, Sistergurls, Raisingurls, out of town trips, its planned so well, that when its over, it feels to ME…… that it NEVER HAPPENED. I love that about myself. I do lots of research, calling folks over the phone, talking in person, coming to a CLEAR UNDERSTANDING, making sure folks understand what I want, and when I want it. I write down everything and don’t miss a beat. LOL This is funny.

They do have a softer side to their personalities. Although they may appear as strong-minded individuals, there are emotional and need to be well taken care of. They have a habit over becoming overcritical but don’t hold that against them because they have the same attitude towards themselves. I agree!!!! My personality is VERY STRONG. I know it comes from my dad, because all of us *3 siblings* are too. We weren’t  allowed to fight at all … period growing up, so our only defense was to argue and debate it out. We are SOME POWERHOUSES!!! One day I’m going to record one of our debates, its so funny. We GO AT IT. We never get personal, we always stay on the subject at hand. LOL That’s a site to see!!!! Yes, I’m very emotional. When it comes to people being mistreated, homeless, hungry, bullied, children, abused….. I am THE PERSON WHO STANDS UP FOR THESE FOLKS!!! I’m a very popular person everywhere I go, BUT …. don’t expect for me to sit a the table with the RICH AND POWERFUL…. Ill be the one making phone calls to get people shelter, food, and assistance. THENNNNN I’ll go mingle. LOL

These women don’t get influenced easily as they wary of exposing their emotional vulnerability and possibility of getting hurt. Besides, one has to match their high standards to impress the perfection-seeking Virgo women. Hence, patience is the key if you want make a lasting impression on a Virgo woman’s mind. Yep, all day long!!!! I’m not geeked on how much money you have or make, your car, your home, your position at work…. I’m geeked on how you treat your parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, COWORKERS, and how well you communicate and greet others as soon as you make contact. Cause see God has treasures stored up for LaCrease in HEAVEN, ….that’s waiting for me. So, in order to impress me…. ON EARTH…… you have to care about PEOPLE. I cant stand or deal with ANY DRAMA…… he has to know what HE can do……. AND KEEP IT MOVING… my train * mind* is always moving!!!

Fun Tips

Virgos will forgive more than once if they love you. But don’t think they won’t get fed up and leave you high and dry. Virgos has a DISS BUTTON… .that’s outta this world!!!! It may take a moment to push it… but TRUST AND BELIEVE… its there!!!

Virgos won’t like people with controlling personalities, and like Scorpio, they NEVER change to suit anyone! I know when to fall back, and when to speak up. I cant deal with people who control with their POWER. #notimpressed

Virgos love the smell of freshness aromas,candles,fresh laundry,perfume,and cologne. YESSS. I LOVE TO SMELL A MAN’S NECK 🙂

Virgo ladies do not date based on looks or money. So it is essential that you have a great sense of humor and a decent outlook on life. I’M silly and love to laugh. I love it.

I am very shy when I meet a guy. VERY… I like to listen and pay attention to everything. People always come to WRONG conclusions about me/us when they think they know us, but have NO IDEA.

For example. I live downtown, and in my apartment complex we have 24 hour security… one of the guys ask me to come here so that he can say something to me. He said… “I know you like me”… and since me and him are cool. It kinda shocked me. So instead of me making all of these facial expressions that would clearly SHUT HIM DOWN VIRGO STYLE… I asked him…. tell me… how did you come to that conclusion? He said the way you look at me when you come in the building, the way you talk to me, the way you smile at me, you have to always say something to me. He said the other day you licked your tongue out at me…. he said I noticed that too. I let him talk for about 10 minutes.

Then it was MY turn….

I said first of all boo * with a smile as always*….. I speak to EVERYONE who makes eye contact with me. I said noticed… when I talk to you as I enter the building….. I’m WALKING to the elevator and talking.

#2 I’m 15 years older than you

#3 I’m friendly to everyone.

#4 I call birds, dogs, cats, men, women………. BOO. Its not a personal word I use for people who I LIKE.

#5 When I licked my tongue out at you that day * God is my witness*, I was praying at the same time saying “God… I cant stand him”!!

We both laughed on that last one. It was truly what I was thinking and praying about. Because by him thinking I “liked” him, I was praying to God how much I cant stand him!!! HE always wants to know what I’m cooking, what I’m doing for the day when I leave the building, what’s in MY BAG…. what do I have on as far as perfume, when I’m coming back. UGH!!! Every time I leave the building he has to ask me a personal question and we HATE for people to be in our business too much. I guess he was calling himself “showing interest” in me. LOL LOL

So, now that we had that talk, we’re good friends. I understand him more, and he knows.. BOO BOO * IN MY KEKE WYATT SILLY VOICE*.. IM JUST BEING FRIENDLY. And all we talk about is his fiance and his new baby on the way. See what talking can do and NOT ASSUMING NO ONE WANTS TO MARRY YOU AND BE YOUR WIFE? * SUB*

My name is La’Crease Walker, and this VIRGO approve this message.

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Women in the Workplace *Cree’s Blog Entry*

1223957964-sc-1483Working with Women can be something different. Whew chile!! I really hope that sharing my story can help you to see one or two things. Either you’re part of the problem or you’re the solution. You already know which one you are.

 

There are 10 of us who work closely together. And if you know me, you will know that I’m very private. When I do open up and share things about me, YOU may think its a lot, but actually, what I DONT SHARE is the “main course” of who I am. This may be the case for many people. especially women.

 

Some women like to start a lot of mess. I can feel it, smell it, and taste it in the air. When that atmosphere arises, I leave. But I’m trying to understand why do a few of these women get offended when I/you don’t want to be apart of their table talk? I’m not connected to ANYONE. I do my own thang. I’m a LEADER OF WHATS RIGHT!!! I’m not the kind of woman that’s going to sit at your table because you’re singing…… are you serious? I’m going to sit there because I want too. People hate to see you doing your own thang, when they want you to be apart of their Shenanigans. I’m not her!!! Its always the OLDER WOMEN… the ones who’ve been at the job for 200 years.

 

This one lady of the 10 was talking about me to a student!!! He came back and told me. I was HOTT!!! They say she talk about everybody, and that I see. She talked about how big my behind was and my hips, with a small waist. Who does that? With a student? Then everyday she breaks her neck to speak to me, trying to be my friend and talk to me. And Lord knows, cause we already had a talk about her, he calmed me down, which she has no idea. I speak to her and keep it moving. EVERYTIME she talks to anyone, and I’m around, she cannot take her eyes off me. She makes noises, talk loud she does everything to get my attention. Wanting so bad to be in my circle. NOT GON HAPPEN!!!  See women like her has to be shut down in the workplace AND ON THE SPOT. She learned real fast, that I’m one person who will speak using direct eye contact when I see you for the first time that day, but will make you feel invisible standing right next to me in a conversation. I will NEVER, EVER, give you a stage to entertain on. She’ll never have a chance to put her clown suit on, and be in my face.

 

Sometimes If I bring dollars to school and the kids want cookies, juice, or chips and they ask me, I’ll give it to them. Of course I wont/cant do this everyday. One of the kids ask me for a dollar for some chips, and I didn’t have it on me. I asked one of the ladies I’m cool with to loan it to me until the next day. She went in her pocket and gave it to me, of course I told her that it was for a student. So, one of the kitchen ladies heard me and said “Sunshine, sunshine come here”! They call me sunshine, and not Ms. Walker because they say I bring the Sun and always smiling to work. *yeah right FAKE* Anyway, she’s an older lady too, and no matter what I will ALWAYS RESPECT HER/THEM. She says to me… why are you giving these kids money? She said these kids have money. I looked at her…. and God said to me… “say it nicely Lacrease”. I said… first of all… a $1.00 is NOTHING to me… NOTHING…I said the reason why I’m so BLESSED is because I love to give. *read this blog entry* http://creesfeedingthehomeless.wordpress.com/2011/12/04/the-plan-and-vision-behind-crees-feeding-the-homeless/   She cut her conversation real short, when she looked into my eyes and realize that I’m cut from another block. She knew then that, I was not a person to be moved by her questions or speech. Its real funny people feel like they can say anyyyyyyything to me, but as soon as I turn into the incredible hulk, or pull out my Jaws teeth, they want to stay away from me *snickling*

 

The point and the big picture here is…. Be your own Leader. Do what’s right, mind your own business at work. Do your own work, and keep peace. There is nothing wrong with listening to what’s going on at work, when it comes to your job, and things that’s going to effect you. But when it starts to get personal, be known for VACATING the PREMISES . So what people get mad when you’re doing something differently than them by doing your work and staying away from them. So what!!! Don’t be afraid to be yourself. Don’t be afraid to be different. Don’t be afraid to stand out. I love me…. and I’m going to do what makes me happy, and DRAMA FREE!!!

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Men…Women…. CONTROL = POWER

BATHROOMThis is the sign that hangs over the toilet in the bathroom connected to the kitchen area in the High School that I work in. Even though I do not work in the kitchen, I often use this bathroom because it’s in the area that I do work. Pay attention to the word “OUR”.

One day last week, all the workers were gone home for the day except for me and one of the kitchen workers. I was sitting in the washroom area checking my emails when one of the kitchen workers told me that I couldn’t sit in that area. As I was leaving, I asked her did she mind me using the bathroom which was connected to the washroom I was sitting in. She said to me.. ” yeah, you can use it, but you have to ask my boss if you can use it again”. I said to her okay and went to use it. When I came out of the bathroom, I went to her and I said… “is it a problem for me and others who don’t work back here to use this bathroom”? She said… ” well you have to ask my boss”. I said asked your boss? For it to even be a issue and question, it must had been discussed in the past. She said.. No, just ask my boss tomorrow. I said I WILL! I was SO MAD!!!

I went home and thought about it… I said I’m not asking anybody anything!! I’ll just go to the bathroom up the hall for now on. In my mind I’m saying ” I don’t have time for that petty stuff. Asking people can I use “their” bathroom is TIME CONSUMING, AND TOO MUCH ENERGY. I refuse to put my mind in minor stuff like that. I can’t.

The very next day, as soon as soon as I came into work that day “her boss” came to me, * I KNEW the lady was going to tell it before I did anyway, had I decided* she said Sunshine * they call me sunshine because they say I bring the sun to work everyday.* She said ****** told me that you asked about using the bathroom, she said I don’t know why she act like that, anybody can use that bathroom, this bathroom is not ours. I said okay… Thank you and explained that I wasn’t going to mention it to her. She said you and anyone can use it.

So, I said okay. This lady is trying to make a big deal out of nothing. I have watched her tell TEACHERS WE CLOSED UP FOR THE DAY… being real mean to them. If they came into the lunch room and ask for a plate she tells them NO… we aren’t allowed to give them out. If they ask for a .50 water and have money, if its in the refrigerator and she’s in one of her moods, she’ll tell them NO. Its so awful how she talks and treats people. She’s not the boss, but she’s been there a while, and there are so many people upset with her. She has to catch the bus from work and the kids pick with her at the bus stop, throwing stuff at her and talking smart. She’ll come to work the next day talking about it. She’s SO SO SO SO MEAN TO THE STUDENTS. … they made her cry at the bus stop. I sat up and thought about how everyday she come in MEAN and tell us about all the things NOT GOING her way in her life.

I knew that when I saw her and looked her dead in the eye the next day, that she was going to have that “funny as” look on her face. For one, she doesn’t know me well, and don’t know which way I’m coming from. I looked at her SMILED and said GOOD MORNING *her name*. She was shocked, she don’t know the GOD in me saves her and others from my past ways. Because I KNOW…. had this been a back in the day incident I would terrorize her with my mean looks … LIKE SHE DOES THE STAFF AND STUDENTS. I don’t like that at all. But here’s what I found out about her, just by studying her behavior.

At home she has ABSOLUTELY no POWER……that’s another story. When she comes to work, she grabs her position and she HOLDS ON TO IT. When a student ask for a simple carton of milk, she tells them NO… and that’s a POWER MOVE for her. She has the YES OR NO in her possession, and she loves the reaction she gets from her NO’S. She, like many people, who feel that they are losing control…. enjoys having the say so to things they normally wouldn’t have POWER and CONTROL over. This is her time to have POWER. She enjoys and lives for this moment for people to get mad and upset with her * and not care* because she, in HER MIND is making sure nobody gets anything extra, make sure all the plates are going to the students only and not teachers and their private needs, if the kitchen is closed she proudly says NO. Thing is, she has the POWER to give these things. And she knows it. Anything and everything in that KITCHEN BELONGS TO THOSE STUDENTS, MATTER OF FACT EVERYTHING IN THE SCHOOL BELONGS TO THE STUDENTS!!!

The point I’m making…. give up the POWER people. Listen, what really do you own? There are people who have money, fame, friends, but there is always an area where they can’t control. If a man have all these things, and can’t have the woman he wants, he will try everything in his POWER to get her. A person who wants POWER will do anything to make sure things go their way. Even if they have to kill, steal, be mean and manipulate the situations. When you give up POWER to things you want to control, it may seem like you are losing control of your life. Having POWER only makes you grip tighter to things you don’t need to hold on to anyway. Let it go.

Last month was Teachers Appreciation week. A few kitchen workers were the FIRST ONES going in the food area grabbing a plate to eat * but do them so wrong* before the teachers even knew the food was there. The principal came in and said…… “someone ( another teacher) make sure the teachers eat first, this is for them.” Some people got offended. My thing is this….it’s for the TEACHERS… people got mad hahaha this wasn’t their function to CONTROL THIS TIME. I sat there with my legs crossed and said to myself…. THANK YOU LORD FOR MY TRUCK being outside, and for having a credit card FULL OF MONEY, and cash in my purse to go and buy MY OWN FOOD when I get off. Thank you Lord for having my own, to where there are angry people and mad people in here….. I AM FULL OF JOY for what you already done for me. At the end of the day, the TEACHERS didn’t eat all the FOOD AND THEY THREW IT IN THE GARBAGE!!!!! Kitchen workers wasn’t allowed to eat it~ POWER ….the teachers didn’t want it, POWER….SMH THE GARBAGE ATE GOOD THAT DAY. 😦   🙂

PRAISE GOD…. I HAVE MY OWN!!!!

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy

Boys to Men * MY Life Lesson* (blog entry)

lady 2.5 secondsSo, here I am 45 living alone for the first time in my life. Meeting new people, and really getting to know myself in ways I never thought to be. I have a daughter, who is my only child, and for the first time in my life working with boys and gurls * teens* I’m getting a glimpse of what its like to deal with boys.

 

I know this sounds “crazy”…. but this is my journey and my personal LIFE LESSON that I’m learning.

 

I remember so clearly telling my sister as she raised my nephews Greg and Gary, that she needs to say NO and stick to it! But she would always tell me… gurls are different than boys. I can’t explain it, And I would say…. that may be, but don’t let them talk you into doing something, when you told them NO!!! She couldn’t get me to understand, and that’s because I didn’t have a SON of my own.

 

Working at a High School has really taught me something’s about myself. I am really a softee. LOL Dealing with gurls is SO much different than dealing with boys. I can tell a gurl, come on lets keep it moving, get to class. She will turn to me and have something smart to say, roll her eyes, and laugh with her gurls, all in one minute. I can tell a boy the same thing, he will smile, try to explain why he’s in the hall way and say… Okay Ms. Walker I’m going to class. He’ll see me later, and talk to me like he’s my SON. But when I see that gurl, she will hold a grudge for dear life!!! LOL This really shocks me, because I raised a gurl and I didn’t have this kind of reaction at all. Even when I started my gurls group Raisingurls to Women. Thing is…. I DONT CARE!!!

 

But here is the big picture of this story. Since being on my own, I have met several men. Maybe 2, I liked, one better than the other. A few days ago, I was downstairs in the business area, which the door is closed to make it private. One of the guys who work here in the building * we’re good friends, he’s one of the 2* came in to talk with me. We chatted for a good while, he kept looking at my lips, but I didn’t really pay it any attention. As he got up to leave *with his TALL THICK SELF*… he reached down *caught me totally off guard* and kissed my lips. I was so shocked! He knew I didn’t like that, and I wondered where did that come from, but at the same time, I can tell that he was happy. It was a ride or die moment for him, and he didn’t care what I thought about it, who was looking, and also for the fact that he was WORKING… he did what he always wanted to do.

 

So yesterday when I saw him, I asked him why did he do that? He said that he couldn’t help it. While I was asking him, it hit me. I have never raised a boy, but I now understand that MEN/BOYS will try us women. They want to see just how far they can go. They test us all the time to see what they can get away with. That’s their nature. They were raised by women, and with that said….that is how they FIRST learned what they can and can’t get away with. WOW WOW WOW!!! And when I bought this up to him, he said YES!!!! That’s how we do, we want to see just how far we can go with you. Everything is a TEST to them.

 

Gosh, what he say that for!!! LOL Looking back at the boys in school, I see that since I never raised a son, they probably can sense that I have a soft spot for them. I even let them have their way, when I shouldn’t. Wow, I learned a lot this past weekend. I can tell a gurl No, she will go on by her business with an attitude, but if I tell a boy No, he will sit there and beg me until I say yes!! Wow. And that’s the same way my nephews now 20 and 22 are. They did my sister the same way. I didn’t get it then. Come to think of it, my nephews did me that way too!!! LOL LOL I love them so much, they can still get anything from me.

 

Okay… so now I know how boys/men think when it comes to getting their way on ANSWERS, QUESTIONS, AND OTHER THINGS…. I’m going to have to “MOTHER-UP” on them and be TOUGH. *smile* TRUST me… I know how!!!

 

Be Blessed

 

 

 

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