Today, I want to write about parents taking charge in the home when it comes to chorus and home work.
First before I go into all of this, just know that I love kids to death. They fascinate me, they make me want to learn more about how they think and how they come to the conclusions that they come too. Yeah, I was a child once, but while you’re busy being just that, you don’t’ have time to reflect on how it is. Maybe that’s why I love kids so much, because not once have I forgotten how I use to be.
Tonight I was on the phone talking to my Sister gurl, and we were talking about children and how unorganized they can be, when WE as parents don’t push them to clean up behind themselves, do home work in a timely fashion, and house work.
Me, I use to be the junkiest person in the world!!! Who would leave stuff all over the floor, tables, stoves, counter, bedroom floor, even the bathroom was junkie and nasty. And when I tell this story they cant believe it. Those who knew me during those times can tell you in 60 seconds, how true it is. I remember being so nasty living in a 4 family flat, I caused the whole building to have to get exterminated, and the people who did it, said they had never in their life seen so many roaches in ONE HOUSE!!!
I was embarrassed!! They talked about me, saying I was the reason why they had to get exterminated, roaches came from me being nasty. All they did was told the truth, but the truth has a way of shaming us sometimes to face up and get right!!! And I’m glad it did.
That was 13 years ago, and the friends I have now, wont beleive that roach story if I had 10 witnesses to back me up. Ive changed. Thank you Jesus.
What I learned was: I was junky and so was my daughter, we would come home from work or school and drop our things right there at the door or kitchen table. We didnt have a clue to what we were doing, we just did it. We didnt focus on the fact that we were creating our own mess to clean up later. We would be “so tired” that we plopped down wherever we sat and didnt move unless we had to use the bathroom, get something to eat, or reach for the remote control. When we finished eating, our plate would be on the living room table, so would our glass and cups. We would sit there until I got tired of looking at the dishes pile up, the bathroom got funky, the stove got nasty, and the table got junky. Then I would get mad at Neisha for “help messing up” the house.
But see I didnt realize that I was the Leader of the house. If she saw me come in and kick my shoes off, then she is going to do the same thing. If she see that my plate is not in the sink, why should she put hers there? If she noticed that I throw my coat across the dining room table she’s going to do the very same thing. So I had to REPROGAM my thinking. I had to pay atention to what I did when I walked into my house. I had to start paying attention to what she does when she walks into the house. I can tell you right now what I do. I walk in, take my shoes off at the door ( from the side door), walk up the stairs and then I think about throwing my coat over the chair in the kitchen, but then I go to my office and put it there, or in my bedroom.
We have to be VERY attentive to our children when we are working on a certain area in their lives. Pay attention to everything they do when they walk into the home. When they start putting things everywhere, go head and watch them. dont say a word. And as soon as they sit down, you call them to that area. Say this: Let me ask you a question? Where are your shoes? And then they will tell you, ask them, where are they suppose to be? Ask them where is your coat? Why is it there? Ask them do they know where its suppose to go? Ask them where? Ask them where is your back pack? Why is it on the floor? Where is suppose to be? GIVE THEM EYE CONTACT, DONT EVEN BLINK IFA FLY COMES PASS YOUR NOSE!!! LOL
Pay attention to them everyday and how they do things when they come home from anywhere. Pay attention. The way to introduce this new way of keeping the house clean is to sit them down the night before. Tell them that its going to be some changes made about how we keep our home cleaned. Explain the rules, and tell them that you will be watching every thing that they do as far as cleaning up the house, home work, and how much TV they watch. Tell them that you will be watching them from the time they come in, till the time they go to bed.
Then you test them on it, after several weeks they will get the hint that you mean business. But remember YOU THE PARENT, you are the LEADER, SET THE EXAMPLE!!! Don’t say another word, dont talk about it, be about it!!
The bible says: 6 Train [a] a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not turn from it.
and when he is old he will not turn from it.
Proverbs 22 (New International Version)