Up late cooking my Collard greens for Christmas Dinner tomorrow with my family . Reflecting on this past year, where it has been great for me. Learning about myself and realizing how much influence I have and how 2016 will be GREATER! Watching my daughter work her BUTT off for those less fortunate, feeding the homeless, working long hours, getting a promotion, encouraging and mentoring kids and teens, assisting others with food, resources and lots of love and patience.
I remember a time in my life when I was wild and use to drink and club, talk on the phone all day and night. God dealt with me. I always took pride on paying my bills AND PAYING OFF the whole balance when it was due. I ran into some hard times when I was in my early 30’s. My lights were cut off, my car broke down, I lost my job, and my gas was turned off… ALL AT ONE TIME. I needed to hear from God. After a few weeks ((which seemed forever)) he finally spoke to me and said. “The person Nesha is to be.. you are getting in the way of it”. ” You are partying, drinking, going out too much, gossiping, having all this sex, talking on the phone, being REVENGEFUL, you need to stop right now!” I was shocked that he was saying all of these things to me, because never in a million years did I think what was happening to me was RELATED TO Nesha/MY BABY.
When I surrendered to God in that moment, it was like the sky opened up and things started happening good for me. I had to change everything about the way I was living. EVERYTHING! I knew it, and for some reason I welcomed it. I stopped talking on the phone.. (( HATE THE PHONE TILL THIS DAY)) I stopped going out, having company over, having sex.. I went back to Church and started reading my Bible daily. I had to cut off people in my life that wasn’t ready to give up what I was doing new. Never knew all of this was going to be connected to my daughters future.
I say all of that to say….. People change over the years. I’m not the same person I was last year, in 2012, in 2011. I have different thoughts and different goals in life. My experiences has changed the way I think. I use to be the Queen of arguing and debates. Today almost 2016.. I don’t go back and forth with NO ONE. I say what I have to say, you say what you have to say…..and after that… its a WRAP! God said to me one day.. LA’CREASE…. in YOUR ADULT LIFE …if you don’t fall out with the SISTERS I GAVE YOU… because you learn the many experiences and personalities of them growing up while living in the same household.. DON’T YOU EVER EVER EVER EVER get into with other women . THEY ARE YOUR MINISTRY!!!!
When I heard that, it made so much sense to me. If I don’t get into it with THEM… why fall out with others.. NEVA AGAIN! EVA AGAIN! I’m so happy that I’m a NEW CREATURE… I think differently than I did 3 years ago, learn differently PRACTICING SELF CONTROL IS EVERYTHING :)!!!!!!. Thank you Lord for change… in 2016 I’m going to make you PROUD OF ME 🙂
I am La’Crease and I don’t have to do ANYTHING ELSE!