Today was a good day.

I guess I\’m having a break down. Nothing bad, but something is on my mind. I did some research as I do when I need too. And I found out some things that was funny, and all at the same time * don\’t know why this is happening to me*. That\’s one thing about me, when I want to find out something, or about someone, I will get my answers. I don\’t and won\’t stop until I do. I\’ve always been like this.

God knows stuff like this drives me CRAZY!!! I\’m a mad woman right now, and until I get out what I need to say to this person, it may get worse inside. Don\’t worry about me, I\’m fine. This has surely humbled me. All while I\’m saying God why am I going through this? You know the answer to what I want to know, please tell me!!! Please!!! Maybe I need for God to come down here face to face and tell me, or maybe I need this person to tell me. I dunno, but I need an answer soon. I am learning patience, but when someone knows you want to know something and purposely hide the answer, that drives me NUTS. I was doing good with this, until I read all my notes , and did some research only to say to myself……….YOU KNOW THE TRUTH LACREASE…….. LOL

And see I\’m also mad at myself too because God told me what I wanted to know. Its some doubt and I don\’t like that I feel that way. God has never steered me wrong. But still I know for sure, but when its time to confront …… I\’m not sure again. God has always lead me right, but this is so mysterious to me that it has me tripping. I mean tripping!!!

Don\’t worry its not bad or anything……………it just has me tripping. I\’m tired. I have done all the research and found out all answers I could ever need, I am turning this over to God. Hopefully, I\’ll hear from you soon so that we can talk, get all the questions and answers out……….and FINALLY learn to TRUST each other.

Cree!

Today was a very good day . I forgot to read my * Faith for a Lifetime Daily Inspirations* this morning . But on my way to work, I did say a prayer in my car. Speaking of car, I told my mother and Neisha that one day, there\’s going to be a truck sitting in the driveway with a Big Yellow Bow on it just for me!!! They started laughing. * Not being funny*, but they know what I say always come true. I can see it now.

Today as I was walking through the store to punch in. I laid eyes on this nice looking guy who was maybe about 43ish. He was dressed nice and everything. I didn\’t pay much attention to him as I would have liked, because I was trying to get to the time clock. When I got to my register and got set up, he came through my line. Now, when I\’m feeling a connection to someone, I purposly won\’t make eye contact until THE RIGHT TIME. Because when I look him in the eye, its gonna be one heck of a connection. I can feel it. So, as he\’s setting his things up on the belt, he notice that its quiet. LOL I\’m laughing to myself, because I know what\’s going through his mind, I can FEEL IT! LOL. He\’s trying to feel me. He wants to know am I friendly, am I cold, he wants to know flat out …WHATS UP WITH THIS GURL!!!! After its too quiet for him he says: *So hows your day going*. I knew that was the ice breaker. I knew that when I looked in his eyes I had to bring the smile, the sexynesss in my voice, the UMP but I knew he needed to know whats up with thatgurltheycallcree!!! LOL After he asked me how was my day going, I looked him dead in the eyes with a sexy smirk and said: pretty good, and yours?* Using the word yours to throw the conversation back to him*. When I looked him in the eyes………. I can see the files of my life being transferred FROM MY MIND TO HIS!!! In one glance it felt as thought he knew everything there is to know about me . LOL I was trying to read him with one look into the eyes, but I had dial up and he had DSL! It was unreal. I knew he was scoping me out. One thing though he looked at my wedding finger and saw my birthstone ring on it. I can tell he thought to himself, she\’s married. To *sweep* the atmosphere to see how he was laying, I said to him, dang you doing some shopping today. He said yes, normally I go to Costco, but I don\’t need to buy that much bulk. He looked me in the eyes and said : Can you believe that this stuff is for only me? That was a sign to tell me that he lives alone and that he\’s single. In my mind I was like oooooooooookay, ummmmmmmm he\’s single. But he kept looking at my ring finger as if he wanted to comment. But he didn\’t. When time came to pay for his order he pulled out a credit card, and license. I scanned down on his Birth date and said Ummm August 25, mines is Sept 3rd. He said OH youre a VIRGO too? That was the door to the conversation. I started cracking up in my mind! That explains everything about him. We are some analyzing people! We listen well, we make good eye contact, you can tell us anything, we have to know that you are for real. When men Virgo\’s make eye contact they are trying to get everything they can out of the conversation. They want to understand where you are coming from. Ain\’t gon lie when he looked at me he put the whammy on a sistah! The more I talked while looking into his eyes, the more his * computer* was generating my files. LOL Its funny, cause I do men like that all the time, but I got got this time!!! LOL

I don\’t know what it is about me, but kids have this connection to me. All the time when kids are at the register with their parents or whom ever, they always stare at me until I say * hey pretty face*, or *hey there handsome*. I\’m like a magnet to them. Its sooooooooooooooooooooooooo unreal. When I personally acknowledge them, they tell me EVERYTHING!! LOL There parents stand there like aaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaa don\’t be telling her all that! LOL I crack up in my mind. I think its because when *grown folks* see or do business with other grown folks, the kids are always neglected. That\’s to be expected because they are kids…true enough. But I treat the kids just like they are people too. Me and their parents have a business connection, but we as parents, people have to acknowledge the kids. They are people too. My everyday line is: Hey pretty face, you\’ve been good? And they look at their parents, and they shake their heads yes, and of course the mom /dad says noooooooooo. LOL Then I ask them do you go to school? They reply yesssss, and I ask them okay who is your best friend in school? And once they tell me, they are in love with me. LOL They are so use to hearing stop doing this, don\’t do that, come here, go sit down, eat that, put that away, take a nap, get outta my face. I like to challenge their thinking. Ill say, why do kids love gum? And they would get shy on me, then when I say, I use to be a little gurl a long time ago but I don\’t remember why I like it, but since you are, why do kids love gum? That\’s when they\’ll say……..because its good!!! LOL Kids are so funny.

Well, I\’m closing for now. I ll be on tomorrow. Take care and God bless

Cree!

I know, I know……….for the life of me I can not wink my eye. Never could. I need to learn because I think winking your eye at your boo is the sexiest thing you can do. When my cousin got married, his bride was coming down the aisle, she blocked everyone out, looked at him and winked her eye. Ahhhhhhhhh, it was so personal, soooooo * this is for you baby, and only you*. If I could wake up one day and be able to wink, I will be so happy and Thankful.

Today was a good day at work. I have been on quiet mode every since Sunday night. Something happened that humbled me, and I think that I needed that night, more than I can ever know. Sometimes when you have no control of things, it can make you ask God………okay what did you want ME to get out of that? Because it really didn\’t make any sense to me. I guess I\’ll know one day. Hopefully soon.

I read my bible daily with my daughter. Right now we are reading the One year bible,and we have learned a lot so far. Today we were reading about Saul and how jealous he was of David. When God is on your side, no one can do anything about that. I\’m just trying to figure out, why when God was on Saul\’s side * with his tall self* why did he turn away and start doing what he wanted to do? But when God chose David, Saul wanna get all mad and wanted him killed. When he defeated camps and stuff, people were all on his * heels* Amening * is that a word*? what God had did through him, but he chose to be greedy. So God was like okay………your time is almost up boo you tripping. But when YOUNG BOY David went down there with 5 rocks, and a sling shot and killed Goliath ……..his boys took off running. Saul wanted David on his *team*, but he knew God had left him and was with David. This is the part that trip me out. When the people had heard what happened with David killing Goliath, they started singing the song that made SAUL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDD. *Saul has slain his thousands, and David his ten of thousands.* Saul was mad because of the numbers. What he did was wrap his self up in the people and what they think, instead of doing things to please God. Had he been thinking about pleasing God, he wouldn\’t second thought that song the people sang. This story can tell you a lot about yourself, I\’m telling you.* Go and read for yourself* 1 Samuel 17.

Well, I\’m gone for the night. I just took me a hot bath, and took me some night cold medicine. My eyes are cross sided right about now. Last night I dosed off without praying, I was sooooo tired. Soon as I dosed off, I heard someone say Lacrease wake up! But it was someone from my dream. I woke up and was like danggggggg who was that? Sound like it was right in my house LOL When I thought about it, I said that had to be God because I forgot to pray. I laughed too. God is funny too. I knew I was always funny and silly in my life, and I thought that God was this thee thou Father that was serious all the time. So it was hard for me to communicate with him AT FIRST. Now, He has showed me that he has a sense of humor and we crack up. I\’m gone for real this time. Good night!

*hold on to yourself*

Hey,

Today was a good day!! I had some good sleep last night too. I got up this morning read my *Faith of a Lifetime Daily Inspirations Book* and surely it got me through the day.

When I first walked in the door from work this evening, 2 of my Sister Pearls were ringing the phone saying that one of them had purchased their airplane ticket today for Atlanta in July. Praise God!!! Both of them will come to Detroit, to fly out with me that next day. We are going to have a good time. There are still 2 more to get their tickets, and that\’s gonna happen soon. God is good. When they all went back home from our first meet and greet here in Detroit last year, we got on the phone and we were looking for Hotels in Atlanta, they were sold out all over the city! WE had the hardest time trying to find rooms. Goodness, never would I have know that a city would be booked up a year ahead. WE finally found a place where there are 4 double beds, 2 bathrooms, living room, kitchen with stove, dinette and 4 chairs, pots and pans, dishes, microwave oven, and TVs. We\’re happy that we don\’t have to split up sleeping in rooms, this way we\’re all in the same room. What a blessing. God did all of this. I got tired of calling all those hotels. LOL It was a job! Then we made reservations for a Rental Van at the airport. We have a friend who lives there, she will be our ATL guide. I love her, and I can\’t wait to meet and hang out with her this summer.

I love going to work because I love my coworkers. Now when it comes to be in charge of something, they always want me to do it. I don\’t know if its because I can get people involved or is it because I\’m friendly and motivated. Sometimes I don\’t like to be in charge, I just like to contribute , do my part and take a back seat. But anyway, I\’m in charge of our Birthday Club along with another friend who thought of the idea. She thought of having this club only a few weeks ago . And since Jan thru parts of May was gone, we decided to only ask the people who BD was from May 21- Dec 31 so that the people in the earlier months wouldn\’t be paying and their BD\’s have past. We started asking people to join and got 17 people * front end *. My coworker started getting discourage because people we mad because SHE didn\’t think of the idea when their BD\’s was coming around. I told her listen……. had you thought of this idea before we would have had it before, I said lets not give up this project because YOU didn\’t think of it before, what kinda mess is that? So, I said look, if they don\’t want to join OH WELL! She was like okay.

I came home typed out and printed about 20 Birthday Club Rules, and a list of each person in the club. When I took them to work and we gave a copy to each person who are participating, a few of the people were jealous. so, I\’m like dang, these are the same people who didn\’t want to join, but mad because their BD\’s have past. So today was payday and we have one BD this month on the 21st. WE lost a member to being fired, and it was time to collect $5.00 from the rest of the people. We went bought a card, and started collecting from the people that were here today. Then the other lady who is doing this came to me this morning discourage, and sad faced. She said Cree, they * she named the people* said that people are going to drop out, and people are going to get fired, and that people are going to pay up. I said look boo, when you are the Leader of something that involves others, you have to understand that some people aren\’t going to pay up, or act right. I said you are a Leader of this club, and you have to understand this right up front. I said don\’t get mad, or discourage the only people who are talking are the ones who BD\’s have past, and they cant join THIS GOOD THANG. I said people are always going to knock something they are not apart of. And as far as the people in the club, in everything you do boo, count on something not to go right. But always have a plan B, keep your cool, do all that you can do to be truthful, and up front to everyone in your group. She felt better. I said now tell me who the little haters are. We started laughing. After she told me, I said come on lets confront dey butts!!! It was our gurls * wont say their names*. WE went to their registers after the customers were gone ,and I said yall talking about our BD club, and they said yeaha laughing. I said, now yall didn\’t want to be in it because yalls Bd has past, I said but yall aint gonna sit back and playa hate on it either! They laughed. I said now, *such and such* is both of your friends, I said we are collecting BD money for the club members, but you both can put in $5.00 too!!! They both looked at us like we were crazy and said nope we aint putting no money up. I said well okay BE QUIET. They know me……I don\’t play. but I can laugh about it too. My co Leader was looking like dang Cree. So we walked back to our area, and I said see the same people who are criticizing YOUR BABY that you BIRTH, are the ones who don\’t want to put in $5.00 just because, but want to dis your good thang. I told her YOU, you can listen to them if you want, but as for me……….I\’m pushing on boo………we got money to collect!!! LOL And guess what? As soon as the card came around. THEY SIGNED IT AND DIDN\’T PUT A DIME IN IT! They lucky I\’m not funny acting, I wouldn\’t let them sign it. They only signed it to show that they are her friends, but Ill never tell they didn\’t want to give her a dime! WOW WOW WOW!

I bought some paint for my Bedroom, and I\’m going to start painting next week. I hate sleeping in beds. When I went to the hotel the Piston games a few weeks ago, my daughter slept in her bed, and I abandoned mines and slept on the chair. I have company coming in all Summer, and so I gotta get my BD in order. I want a TRUCK SO BAD ITS CRAZY. I have this vision of me going outside to my driveway, and seeing a BLACK TRUCK IN A YELLOW BOW! I don\’t know why I see this all the time. I even dream about this. I want a BLACK OR GREEN ENVOY OR A 4 DOOR TRAILBLAZER! My bedroom window is right at my DRIVEWAY. I would love to get up and see it every morning!!!

Today I bought this Virgo book. I saw it and picked it up. When I read it I couldn\’t believe how much of its so true about me. I stop getting all off into astrology * I was real bad back in the day*. but some of that stuff is true. Here is just a little of it…………..

Your color is pale green, your metal is quicksilver and the mantra of your sign us: I ANALYZE. * yeah this is true*. I analyze toooooo much. OMG!

Because you are a service-oriented person, you may seek a career as a social worker, marriage and family, counselor, massage therapist, psychologist or member of the clergy. Working with the disabled, homeless or children* yes this is me* with learning difficulties can be rewarding for you.There are sure to be times when you get tired of always being the wise and sensible one,* All the time, I am* even though the role suits you. For that reason there may be one or two friends you feel closest to, in whom you are likely to confide secrets, perhaps even more than family members.*Yep that\’s Cree*! You may keep a journal or thought book or write poetry or short stories. It goes without saying that you love to read. Whether its books, magazines, newspapers or online blogs
,*LOL* you simply can\’t get enough. * Wow* Reading is my Life!!! LOL MY LIFE!

Well, its late and I\’m tired. Gotta long day at work tomorrow. Talk to you all tomorrow.

Cree!

Ah, Thank God I\’m home chilling!!!

This morning when I got up I had my mind on something, and I hate that too because I can feel that God is saying God morning to me, and here I am thinking about something else. When you wake up in the mornings, its suppose to be you and God, nothing or nobody else. So when my mind is not stayed on Jesus, I do something about it. I put him there.

Which reminds me. I have been reading the One year bible for almost 2 months, I read it daily and faithfully. I remembered this promise that I made to God before Neisha was born. I told him, I said if you give me a daughter I promise you she would know you. I got in the bathtub each night to be with the Lord and to ask him this question. I was 18 when we had become good friends because of those nights together. When I had her, the doctors told me that she was a gurl, I knew that God had did this just for me. I was so happy, so was her dad. As she got older, I would buy her bible books to read afterwards she would have questions for me. We *shopped* 2 or 3 weeks for a Church home and finally we joined Second Ebenezer. She was baptized at 9 years old on Oct 2, 1995. Her grand mother and her aunt goes to this Church. I LOVE IT. WE LOVE IT.

Anyway, now that she\’s in her last year of College she\’s gonna need a lot of JESUS in her life, especially in her field as a Criminal~State Prosecutor. When I started reading the bible in One Year I asked her to join me and she loves it!! I\’m so happy that she does. And when the bible says: Train up a child in the way he should go: when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6 please believe its the truth. I guess the point I\’m making is. The one year bible is dated and we have been reading about how God kept saving Israel. They kept turning on him with these false God\’s, forgetting him, and doing all sorts of things. In the book of Judges, this is what I read every so many paragraphs. Then the Israelites did evil in the eyes of the Lord. OMG I said to myself, how many chances is he going to give them? Then I thought about us, he gives us chance after chance just like he did them. If you really look at your life and see all the times it took for you to get it right, you would be amazed and how good and merciful he is. I mean Wowwwwwww! Which reminds me to always say Thank you in everything. I was walking to the time clock, and I said Lord thank you for letting me be able to walk. Thank you Lord. I have to promise myself that I can not forget about him. None of us can. We cant forget him like that. Its bad enough we do what we want to do half the time without asking him. He is our parent, and yes we still need permission to do stuff. I love to Thank him. I look around my house all the time and say thank you Lord for this beautiful house that I live in. I thank him for using my arms, and being able to talk. I Thank him for peace in my life, I thank him for being able to use my mind. He has a lot of work to do on me * hehe*, but you know what I\’m willing to get better everyday with the things that I fall short on. God loves us. If we would only let him do his part in us, we would be tight. I pray for Wisdom and understanding all the time. Even if I don\’t agree I want to understand.

The other day me and my coworker was talking. She\’s a lot younger than I am, with a mouth on her. OOOOOOO weeeeeeee, I see myself in her so much when I was her age. I think God purposely put * Cree* types of gurls in to my life, cause seems like I\’m the only one who can understand them. Anyway, she has a problem with one of the Customer Service Managers who happens to be my favorite person at work, and she knows that me and her are cool. I love this manager because she\’s a true Christian, she\’s a person who wants to know the truth, she likes to get to the bottom of things, she do what is fair, she looks into things. We have even prayed together right at her podium where we do business . She prayed for me one day after I told her I was sick, and later on I was like gurl, I feel so much better. She said good , cause I said a prayer for you. I love that about her. Thats how our friendship is, plus she\’s very pretty too it maybe the reason why my coworker gives her so much flack. And every time this CSM confronts my coworker on something she gets mad and want to talk loud. She knows that when I connect with her with my eyes, I\’m going to tell her she know she\’s wrong. Well, today she was reading this Avon book, out in the opening at the register, so what there wasn\’t any customers in her line. But that\’s not allowed. I mean come on now, you can feel when you\’re wrong and out of order. So the CSM walked up to her * while I was watching* and said to her you\’re not suppose to be reading that book at your register. She put the book down and looked over at me. Now she was waiting on me to say something. I waited for her and sure enough, she said SEE SHE SHE\’S HARRASING ME. I said NO, you knew you were wrong in reading that book out in the opening like that. I can tell that she didn\’t want to hear that, but I told her you KNOW YOU were wrong gurl!!! When you\’re wrong you\’re wrong, come on now.You cant sugar coat wrong. I\’m not a friend to sit up and Amen wrong stuff either, and she knows that about me. She don\’t want to get it, she just want to do what she wants to do. LOL That\’s my gurl tho.

I downloaded that stupid yahoo messenger and it messed up my computer!! Dang why did I do that? It took me 2 hours this evening to fix my baby! I knew I should have listened to my first mind. But its all good. Next time I chat with someone it will be in MSN. I hate yahoo instant messenger!!!

Well, I\’m about to get in the tub and chill.

Be Blessed,

Lacrease

Today Im rambling, got a lot of things on my mind…….not bad…….. just things that need to be done and done according to my plans.

First off, I wrote down everything I need to do before my trip to ATL. I have to do this to a tee for real. Usually when I get paid I will shop in Walmart buying movies and stuff I really don\’t need. I just hate running out of stuff. I love going to the movies, and out to dinner with my family. But this time Im going to have to learn to say no to those things. I have to buy outfits for my trip, little things like earrings, night gowns, sandals, bras panties stuff like that. I like to have brand new things when I travel. Plus, I have some friends coming in from out of town for the Anita Baker concert July 12. Neisha is going to Ohio for the summer to be with her cousins on her dad side. She\’s been about 5 times already this year, that gurl travels more than me. This trip is really special because I get to see my Sister Pearls, and I love them so much. We all met on the Tyler Perry message board, who would have known? We love that man.

My good friend is getting married June 1, and I cant wait to see her walk down the aisle. I am going to snap so many photos its crazy, she deserves it. Guess what too? She works and supervise her swift at a Group Home, just the place I want to work for the rest of my life. She called me and told me that she can get me in this week!! I was like yesssssss. But I decided that I was going to wait until after this trip was over because I didnt want to lose them. Plus these are my paid vacation days that Im using to go to ATL. She understood and agreed. And she told me that when I was ready to let her know. Aint God good? Look at my daddy. He has always been good to me like that. Always!!!

Have you ever met back up with an old friend or someone you were cool with, and you have a lot of things to tell them, but you just can\’t do it in one sitting? You have to gain that persons trust before you lay everything out? And its not even about any gossip or people in general, but about what life, you, them, things in general. Men dont get that. Women do. Im just not the person to jump right into something and be like: Oh gurl/boy remember my cousin john? He got drafted into the NBA, or did you know that I moved 3 times since Jan? You make small talk with that person, then you get into the heavy stuff. I have this good friend that I love dearly, my family and her family called us *partners in crime*. I can tell you stuff we did, that I wouldnt reminse with her about. We were off the hook back in our days. So when I saw her again, we made small talk and how this person did and that person doing, then shoo after a while we got into the heavy stuff. LOL I mean stuff so heavy I was like dang!!!! FOR REAL? LOL Im a Virgo as it is, Im very very private. My circle is small. I have to make sure you are good peeps before I start empying my head out. Im just not like that. Let me feel you first. Let me work on milk with you, then we can go to the meat. Im not going to skip the bottle!!!! LOL

Im seriously thinking about starting back up a Womens Group, because a lot of my friends are going through with theit boyfriends, they are trying to make it out here and its hard. I want them into my house where I can teach them that you can be happy single and loving the Lord. They dont see the reason why they are not being blessed its because they are laying up with their boyfriends, having sex, getting drunk and all this other stuff. They always want to talk to me. I love it too because I will share my testimony at the drop of a hat. God put an end to my foolishness early * in a book Im writing*, and for anybody who knows its ME! I have held so many get togethers and people loved them. Im seriously thinking about it. Im going to pray on that one.

Well, Im on my way to bed, gotta get up in a few hours for work. Im going to have a good day too. I mean that. Talk to you all later.

Cree!

Hey,

I havent been over to this site in a long time. I miss being over here, maybe I should blog in both spots. I dont even check my messages. what a bad gurl.

Well, my friend came back into the picture. He hurt me again and dipped on me. I just don\’t know what to say. If I tell him what God told me he may deny it. Then If I just dont say anything, he\’ll say * I gotta go*. Well, I know what I know and thats it. When God told me to get up and walk into my office, I had no idea what I was about to see. LOL I\’ll never forget that day.

I\’d give anything to have a conversation where we can trust each other. Not tit for tat either. In everything he says he just believes that he\’s so *sure* about everything. Sometimes I just want to come through the computer on him and pinch him.

But you know…….one day I will get a chance to say what I want to say without feeling that Im being * noisy* or talking about the same *person*.

This is too serious to me. I love to laugh and talk smack!!! LOL I tell you this has truly humbled me. I can go on and on but I wont.

Take care …………. Mr. Chicken and Fries

For my Sister Pearls! Detroit, Michigan

Ambassador Bridge, Canada

Anita Baker

Have anyone ever had a friend that just disappeared into cyber space? Well, I have a friend that I love dearly. He knows this too. Its been a year, and I know you have been thinking about me, and I have been thinking about you too. Why are you gone away from me so long? I know I said somethings that I shouldnt said, and Im so sorry. Please forgive me. There is sooooooooooooooooooooo much that I want to share with you in email, and its killing me that I can\’t talk to you to get it out. Just trust me, I am your friend. I miss you. I know youre busy doing your thang, and I won\’t bug you. I just need to talk to you. God knows I miss your friendship. I do. I hope to hear from you soon