Tag: men

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#VIRGO #VIRGOS VIRGOS!!!!! Cree’s Blog Entry!!!

blurrymeI use to be deep into signs in my 20’s, these days every now and then I’ll find myself reading something on line about Virgos. I find the things that people say about us to be so true….some folks need to #tryagain.

I found some interesting post on line *Virgo Woman by GaneshaSpeaks.com , I want to share them and respond. My comments are about me, but you can learn a lot about yourself or someone you know or date.

The Virgo women’s greatest assets are their intelligence, analytical minds and excellent memory. They are logical thinkers who would take any into account every detail before arriving at a decision. Therefore, they are good at settling disputes and make good business partners, analysts and strategists. I do remember a lot, but I take in so much from myself and others, that I don’t believe I remember a lot. But maybe its true for things I WANT TO REMEMBER. LOL Yes, I think about everything!!! That’s why I’m a great planner. I can plan something, and think of the smallest detail in making it happen. When I do my Feeding the Homeless projects, Sistergurls, Raisingurls, out of town trips, its planned so well, that when its over, it feels to ME…… that it NEVER HAPPENED. I love that about myself. I do lots of research, calling folks over the phone, talking in person, coming to a CLEAR UNDERSTANDING, making sure folks understand what I want, and when I want it. I write down everything and don’t miss a beat. LOL This is funny.

They do have a softer side to their personalities. Although they may appear as strong-minded individuals, there are emotional and need to be well taken care of. They have a habit over becoming overcritical but don’t hold that against them because they have the same attitude towards themselves. I agree!!!! My personality is VERY STRONG. I know it comes from my dad, because all of us *3 siblings* are too. We weren’t  allowed to fight at all … period growing up, so our only defense was to argue and debate it out. We are SOME POWERHOUSES!!! One day I’m going to record one of our debates, its so funny. We GO AT IT. We never get personal, we always stay on the subject at hand. LOL That’s a site to see!!!! Yes, I’m very emotional. When it comes to people being mistreated, homeless, hungry, bullied, children, abused….. I am THE PERSON WHO STANDS UP FOR THESE FOLKS!!! I’m a very popular person everywhere I go, BUT …. don’t expect for me to sit a the table with the RICH AND POWERFUL…. Ill be the one making phone calls to get people shelter, food, and assistance. THENNNNN I’ll go mingle. LOL

These women don’t get influenced easily as they wary of exposing their emotional vulnerability and possibility of getting hurt. Besides, one has to match their high standards to impress the perfection-seeking Virgo women. Hence, patience is the key if you want make a lasting impression on a Virgo woman’s mind. Yep, all day long!!!! I’m not geeked on how much money you have or make, your car, your home, your position at work…. I’m geeked on how you treat your parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, COWORKERS, and how well you communicate and greet others as soon as you make contact. Cause see God has treasures stored up for LaCrease in HEAVEN, ….that’s waiting for me. So, in order to impress me…. ON EARTH…… you have to care about PEOPLE. I cant stand or deal with ANY DRAMA…… he has to know what HE can do……. AND KEEP IT MOVING… my train * mind* is always moving!!!

Fun Tips

Virgos will forgive more than once if they love you. But don’t think they won’t get fed up and leave you high and dry. Virgos has a DISS BUTTON… .that’s outta this world!!!! It may take a moment to push it… but TRUST AND BELIEVE… its there!!!

Virgos won’t like people with controlling personalities, and like Scorpio, they NEVER change to suit anyone! I know when to fall back, and when to speak up. I cant deal with people who control with their POWER. #notimpressed

Virgos love the smell of freshness aromas,candles,fresh laundry,perfume,and cologne. YESSS. I LOVE TO SMELL A MAN’S NECK 🙂

Virgo ladies do not date based on looks or money. So it is essential that you have a great sense of humor and a decent outlook on life. I’M silly and love to laugh. I love it.

I am very shy when I meet a guy. VERY… I like to listen and pay attention to everything. People always come to WRONG conclusions about me/us when they think they know us, but have NO IDEA.

For example. I live downtown, and in my apartment complex we have 24 hour security… one of the guys ask me to come here so that he can say something to me. He said… “I know you like me”… and since me and him are cool. It kinda shocked me. So instead of me making all of these facial expressions that would clearly SHUT HIM DOWN VIRGO STYLE… I asked him…. tell me… how did you come to that conclusion? He said the way you look at me when you come in the building, the way you talk to me, the way you smile at me, you have to always say something to me. He said the other day you licked your tongue out at me…. he said I noticed that too. I let him talk for about 10 minutes.

Then it was MY turn….

I said first of all boo * with a smile as always*….. I speak to EVERYONE who makes eye contact with me. I said noticed… when I talk to you as I enter the building….. I’m WALKING to the elevator and talking.

#2 I’m 15 years older than you

#3 I’m friendly to everyone.

#4 I call birds, dogs, cats, men, women………. BOO. Its not a personal word I use for people who I LIKE.

#5 When I licked my tongue out at you that day * God is my witness*, I was praying at the same time saying “God… I cant stand him”!!

We both laughed on that last one. It was truly what I was thinking and praying about. Because by him thinking I “liked” him, I was praying to God how much I cant stand him!!! HE always wants to know what I’m cooking, what I’m doing for the day when I leave the building, what’s in MY BAG…. what do I have on as far as perfume, when I’m coming back. UGH!!! Every time I leave the building he has to ask me a personal question and we HATE for people to be in our business too much. I guess he was calling himself “showing interest” in me. LOL LOL

So, now that we had that talk, we’re good friends. I understand him more, and he knows.. BOO BOO * IN MY KEKE WYATT SILLY VOICE*.. IM JUST BEING FRIENDLY. And all we talk about is his fiance and his new baby on the way. See what talking can do and NOT ASSUMING NO ONE WANTS TO MARRY YOU AND BE YOUR WIFE? * SUB*

My name is La’Crease Walker, and this VIRGO approve this message.

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
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Men…Women…. CONTROL = POWER

BATHROOMThis is the sign that hangs over the toilet in the bathroom connected to the kitchen area in the High School that I work in. Even though I do not work in the kitchen, I often use this bathroom because it’s in the area that I do work. Pay attention to the word “OUR”.

One day last week, all the workers were gone home for the day except for me and one of the kitchen workers. I was sitting in the washroom area checking my emails when one of the kitchen workers told me that I couldn’t sit in that area. As I was leaving, I asked her did she mind me using the bathroom which was connected to the washroom I was sitting in. She said to me.. ” yeah, you can use it, but you have to ask my boss if you can use it again”. I said to her okay and went to use it. When I came out of the bathroom, I went to her and I said… “is it a problem for me and others who don’t work back here to use this bathroom”? She said… ” well you have to ask my boss”. I said asked your boss? For it to even be a issue and question, it must had been discussed in the past. She said.. No, just ask my boss tomorrow. I said I WILL! I was SO MAD!!!

I went home and thought about it… I said I’m not asking anybody anything!! I’ll just go to the bathroom up the hall for now on. In my mind I’m saying ” I don’t have time for that petty stuff. Asking people can I use “their” bathroom is TIME CONSUMING, AND TOO MUCH ENERGY. I refuse to put my mind in minor stuff like that. I can’t.

The very next day, as soon as soon as I came into work that day “her boss” came to me, * I KNEW the lady was going to tell it before I did anyway, had I decided* she said Sunshine * they call me sunshine because they say I bring the sun to work everyday.* She said ****** told me that you asked about using the bathroom, she said I don’t know why she act like that, anybody can use that bathroom, this bathroom is not ours. I said okay… Thank you and explained that I wasn’t going to mention it to her. She said you and anyone can use it.

So, I said okay. This lady is trying to make a big deal out of nothing. I have watched her tell TEACHERS WE CLOSED UP FOR THE DAY… being real mean to them. If they came into the lunch room and ask for a plate she tells them NO… we aren’t allowed to give them out. If they ask for a .50 water and have money, if its in the refrigerator and she’s in one of her moods, she’ll tell them NO. Its so awful how she talks and treats people. She’s not the boss, but she’s been there a while, and there are so many people upset with her. She has to catch the bus from work and the kids pick with her at the bus stop, throwing stuff at her and talking smart. She’ll come to work the next day talking about it. She’s SO SO SO SO MEAN TO THE STUDENTS. … they made her cry at the bus stop. I sat up and thought about how everyday she come in MEAN and tell us about all the things NOT GOING her way in her life.

I knew that when I saw her and looked her dead in the eye the next day, that she was going to have that “funny as” look on her face. For one, she doesn’t know me well, and don’t know which way I’m coming from. I looked at her SMILED and said GOOD MORNING *her name*. She was shocked, she don’t know the GOD in me saves her and others from my past ways. Because I KNOW…. had this been a back in the day incident I would terrorize her with my mean looks … LIKE SHE DOES THE STAFF AND STUDENTS. I don’t like that at all. But here’s what I found out about her, just by studying her behavior.

At home she has ABSOLUTELY no POWER……that’s another story. When she comes to work, she grabs her position and she HOLDS ON TO IT. When a student ask for a simple carton of milk, she tells them NO… and that’s a POWER MOVE for her. She has the YES OR NO in her possession, and she loves the reaction she gets from her NO’S. She, like many people, who feel that they are losing control…. enjoys having the say so to things they normally wouldn’t have POWER and CONTROL over. This is her time to have POWER. She enjoys and lives for this moment for people to get mad and upset with her * and not care* because she, in HER MIND is making sure nobody gets anything extra, make sure all the plates are going to the students only and not teachers and their private needs, if the kitchen is closed she proudly says NO. Thing is, she has the POWER to give these things. And she knows it. Anything and everything in that KITCHEN BELONGS TO THOSE STUDENTS, MATTER OF FACT EVERYTHING IN THE SCHOOL BELONGS TO THE STUDENTS!!!

The point I’m making…. give up the POWER people. Listen, what really do you own? There are people who have money, fame, friends, but there is always an area where they can’t control. If a man have all these things, and can’t have the woman he wants, he will try everything in his POWER to get her. A person who wants POWER will do anything to make sure things go their way. Even if they have to kill, steal, be mean and manipulate the situations. When you give up POWER to things you want to control, it may seem like you are losing control of your life. Having POWER only makes you grip tighter to things you don’t need to hold on to anyway. Let it go.

Last month was Teachers Appreciation week. A few kitchen workers were the FIRST ONES going in the food area grabbing a plate to eat * but do them so wrong* before the teachers even knew the food was there. The principal came in and said…… “someone ( another teacher) make sure the teachers eat first, this is for them.” Some people got offended. My thing is this….it’s for the TEACHERS… people got mad hahaha this wasn’t their function to CONTROL THIS TIME. I sat there with my legs crossed and said to myself…. THANK YOU LORD FOR MY TRUCK being outside, and for having a credit card FULL OF MONEY, and cash in my purse to go and buy MY OWN FOOD when I get off. Thank you Lord for having my own, to where there are angry people and mad people in here….. I AM FULL OF JOY for what you already done for me. At the end of the day, the TEACHERS didn’t eat all the FOOD AND THEY THREW IT IN THE GARBAGE!!!!! Kitchen workers wasn’t allowed to eat it~ POWER ….the teachers didn’t want it, POWER….SMH THE GARBAGE ATE GOOD THAT DAY. 😦   🙂

PRAISE GOD…. I HAVE MY OWN!!!!

Where works of the flesh exists, there is NO joy
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Boys to Men * MY Life Lesson* (blog entry)

lady 2.5 secondsSo, here I am 45 living alone for the first time in my life. Meeting new people, and really getting to know myself in ways I never thought to be. I have a daughter, who is my only child, and for the first time in my life working with boys and gurls * teens* I’m getting a glimpse of what its like to deal with boys.

 

I know this sounds “crazy”…. but this is my journey and my personal LIFE LESSON that I’m learning.

 

I remember so clearly telling my sister as she raised my nephews Greg and Gary, that she needs to say NO and stick to it! But she would always tell me… gurls are different than boys. I can’t explain it, And I would say…. that may be, but don’t let them talk you into doing something, when you told them NO!!! She couldn’t get me to understand, and that’s because I didn’t have a SON of my own.

 

Working at a High School has really taught me something’s about myself. I am really a softee. LOL Dealing with gurls is SO much different than dealing with boys. I can tell a gurl, come on lets keep it moving, get to class. She will turn to me and have something smart to say, roll her eyes, and laugh with her gurls, all in one minute. I can tell a boy the same thing, he will smile, try to explain why he’s in the hall way and say… Okay Ms. Walker I’m going to class. He’ll see me later, and talk to me like he’s my SON. But when I see that gurl, she will hold a grudge for dear life!!! LOL This really shocks me, because I raised a gurl and I didn’t have this kind of reaction at all. Even when I started my gurls group Raisingurls to Women. Thing is…. I DONT CARE!!!

 

But here is the big picture of this story. Since being on my own, I have met several men. Maybe 2, I liked, one better than the other. A few days ago, I was downstairs in the business area, which the door is closed to make it private. One of the guys who work here in the building * we’re good friends, he’s one of the 2* came in to talk with me. We chatted for a good while, he kept looking at my lips, but I didn’t really pay it any attention. As he got up to leave *with his TALL THICK SELF*… he reached down *caught me totally off guard* and kissed my lips. I was so shocked! He knew I didn’t like that, and I wondered where did that come from, but at the same time, I can tell that he was happy. It was a ride or die moment for him, and he didn’t care what I thought about it, who was looking, and also for the fact that he was WORKING… he did what he always wanted to do.

 

So yesterday when I saw him, I asked him why did he do that? He said that he couldn’t help it. While I was asking him, it hit me. I have never raised a boy, but I now understand that MEN/BOYS will try us women. They want to see just how far they can go. They test us all the time to see what they can get away with. That’s their nature. They were raised by women, and with that said….that is how they FIRST learned what they can and can’t get away with. WOW WOW WOW!!! And when I bought this up to him, he said YES!!!! That’s how we do, we want to see just how far we can go with you. Everything is a TEST to them.

 

Gosh, what he say that for!!! LOL Looking back at the boys in school, I see that since I never raised a son, they probably can sense that I have a soft spot for them. I even let them have their way, when I shouldn’t. Wow, I learned a lot this past weekend. I can tell a gurl No, she will go on by her business with an attitude, but if I tell a boy No, he will sit there and beg me until I say yes!! Wow. And that’s the same way my nephews now 20 and 22 are. They did my sister the same way. I didn’t get it then. Come to think of it, my nephews did me that way too!!! LOL LOL I love them so much, they can still get anything from me.

 

Okay… so now I know how boys/men think when it comes to getting their way on ANSWERS, QUESTIONS, AND OTHER THINGS…. I’m going to have to “MOTHER-UP” on them and be TOUGH. *smile* TRUST me… I know how!!!

 

Be Blessed

 

 

 

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the man in the ELEVATOR

ELEVThank you Jesus for waking me up this morning…. I could be dead this morning, but I’m so glad that I’m in that number, to still be in the race!!!

Men are really something. I study them a LOT…. a whole LOT. I just don’t say anything. I watch the boys at work, men that engage in conversations with others, the stats they post on FB or tweet. I pay attention to everything.

Whenever I walk into the elevator here in my building, there is this guy who likes me, and whenever he’s on there, before I get on, he seems to be hypnotized by my presence. Can’t lie….. I am too. So, I started paying more attention to the men who are alone with me on the elevator. I realized that its the PERSONAL SPACE that creates an atmosphere that allows our Spirits to connect. I can feel it. I can not even explain how I feel when I’m in the elevator with him. He’s FIONE….. TALL TALL TALL, THICK * A POWER HOUSE* pretty smile. And he looks at me with such intensity. He makes me wanna sing the lyrics to “C-Low and Melanie Fiona ” A fool for you. Melanie Fiona – Verse)
OH, So sweet, so deep, so real, oooh weeee, got damn!That’s some powerful stuff Ooh, How you do it? Do do do it[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/fool-for-you-lyrics-melanie-fiona.html ]Keep it coming baby, I can’t seem to get enough What you do, what you say Makes me want to luh luh love you Baby, I don’t even have a choice Ooh and if I did it’d still be you Cuz you’re the man, among these other boys
Sweet sugar, I surrender, white flag, Oh I won’t even put up a fight Ooooh cuz there ain’t a damn thing wrong About this kind of loving Ooh when it feels so right
Call her, write a letter, tell it to my mama And she gon’ tell the world that I love You !Oooooh some people probably say I’m crazy But I don’t mind, being a fool a for you.
I’m a fool, I’m a fool, I’m such a fool

So, this morning, the elevator opened up…..and there he was ALONE. I wanted to wait on the next one going down. I was looking cute and smelling good too. This time he had the power…. LOL usually when I’m on FIRST I have the POWER. I got on and we made small talk, actually we’ve been friends for a while, we text, and everything. He looked at me, I turned my head… cause MY eye contact is ANOTHER STORY. I get real quiet and shy. He can tell. And what’s funny… is that whenever we go to another floor on the way down to pick up someone else, as soon as that door open, OUR SPIRITS spill out unto that floor, and as the person come in, they look at us both THEN walk in. They can feel something from us. Its in the air. I can’t even look this guy in the eye…. and its so cute because he stares at me all the way until we get to the first floor. He DOESNT CARE WHO IS ON THE ELEVATOR WITH US. LOL Its only been 3 months since I moved on my own, and I dunno know if I’m attracting many guys to me, or is it that I’m free, and find myself “looking available”? Something is definitely different about me. I guess I’m just feeling good about myself.

In other news…… I was at work today and got a call from SECURITY in my building. I couldn’t take it, but I called back when I got the chance. Well.. they told me that I apparently I didn’t shut my apartment door good enough, and when someone walked pass, they went to the office and told them. So, they came up walked around to make sure that everything looked okay, and then called me. This is the 3rd time I did this. I have to be careful.

Man, the way the door shut, you have to wait for a “snap” in order to know its closed, no matter how much you check it. The last time this happened about 2 weeks or less ago. The guy who likes me *elevator* was walking pass, and he saw my door open, I WAS LAYING ON THE COUCH SLEEP!!! OH LAWD JESUS…. In my sleep I heard lots of talking, and then I heard the wind blowing or something. Well it woke me up to him looking in my apartment to see why was my door opened. When I saw him, I said CLOSE MY DOOR!!!! I just started screaming. I did apologize to him later. I remember opening the door just before my nap, and hearing someone in the hall way and decided to take my trash out later. I laid down and didn’t close the door all the way. Man, I gotta be careful. Later when me and him talked about that, he told me that he wanted to come in my apartment and have his way with me …..Wow… Men can take something so serious to a woman… and make it ALLLLLL ABOUT THEM. *blank stare*

Tomorrow Story….. Remember we sharing about the gurls who are the LEADERS in school. and me saying that if I can break down the LEADERS OF THE GROUP…. I can get to her crew? Well, not only did I break her down… but now she calls me AUNTIE….. LOL AND BAAAAABY SHE’S A HANDFUL!!!! GOSH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH THOUGH. If I was to have another baby, it would be a boy. I cant deal with the gurls like I use too. They be doing the MOST!

Well, I’m about to go to bed…. Be Blessed

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Relationship *MATH* by Nelly * love this* TRUTH

LOVE LOVE LOVERapper Nelly sat for a candid interview where he revealed if he ever plans to marry and why industry relationships often fail.

Now that we’ve watched his longterm relationship with Ashanti fizzle out, and seen him spark up something new with actress Tae Heckard, rapper Nelly gave a surprisingly candid interview about his thoughts on marriage and relationship (which might explain the backstory to of the Ashanti breakup).

He says he does want to get married one day, but no one will pressure him into it. Also, he gave an interesting perspective on industry relationships saying you can’t compare them to “normal” couples. He says you can’t compare a relationship between to non-celebrities who’ve been dating for seven years, to that of a celebrity couple who’s been dating for the same amount of time. He explained that if you factor in all the travel and time spent away from home, the celebrity couple might have only spent three years together. It’s a different kind of math. Here are the highlights:

On industry relationships:

I think people see the relationships that industry folk have and they see the time, but there’re not doing the math. If you do the math on that time, you’ll see that it equals out to something totally different.

On public perception of his relationships:

I shy away from public perceptions about my relationships. You can’t tell me what I should be doing in my relationship. I’m not home everyday. I haven’t seen her in two weeks. You see so many celebrities get married and then they’re divorced in a year. You know why? It’s because when they get finally get together….the -ish that you thought was cute, becomes annoying.

On if he will ever get married:

Yea I think so. But nobody is going to force me. Nobody is going to rush me into anything. Marriage is something you should do when you are ready to do it and you know this is everything. I take marriage very seriously. And I only know two ways of marriage. My parents’ marriage didn’t last at all and my grandparents’ marriage lasted 60 years. I’m either gonna go all the way to 60, or I’m not gonna do it.

On being faithful:

I know me. If I have any questions, I’m going to play on that and eventually that may weigh in on the situation.

On if he’s ever been close to marriage:

I don’t think you’ve been close until you’ve been engaged. (He’s never been engaged).

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My lovely weekend!!!

homeboy<~~~ How Im feeling today. LOL

Wow what a wonderful weekend I had.

 

 

Anytime I’m with my Sisters, my mom and my friends I’m always happy. Just being in the presence of these women makes me smile. I want to Thank my Sister Yolanda, Charlene, Gloria G, Gloria W, Tanisha, her daughter, and her friend, Lanice, Ms. Sweety, Darcella, Vikki, Shann, My mom, Tyra, Tammy and myself makes 16. We ALL met up at the movies at 2:30 to see Tyler Perry’s TEMPTATION confessions of a marriage counselor. My second FAVORITE MOVIE FROM HIM!!!And yes…. it was jammed packed!!! Then afterwards we went down the street to Apple bees had dinner over discussion. We had a good time. I love when women get together and have different ways of looking at the same movie… sometimes I’m like huh? How did you come to that? LOL There is one thing, that we couldn’t agree on. I wont say it yet, in case some of you haven’t seen it yet. But let me say this…. please go and see this with your husbands, and wives, this movie will have you thinking, and make you realize what you have. I’m such a message person, I can get a message out of a dog waiting on his master to cross the street. LOL This movie will make you look at life differently.

Today is one of those days where I’m feeling……”some kinda way”. Can’t explain how I’m feeling. So my friend started his new job today. I won’t be seeing him anymore. I think its best, why waste time with a man when you know what he wants, and you have no plans to give it to him? He called me several times… I didn’t answer the phone. I’m done with that chapter…

I GUESS YOU KNOW….. today I was taking a nap on the couch, when I heard this loud burst of wind and people talking like they were in the next room. I just laid under the cover *to lazy to turn on some heat*, but then the noise seemed closer. So, I came from under the cover and there my door was CRACKED WIDE ENOUGH for me to see a guy who works in the building sweeping. We know each other and so after I realize it was him. I SCREAMED “HOW DID MY DOOR GET OPEN”? CLOSE MY DOOR!!!! CLOSE MY DOOOOOOOR!!! Poor guy, he said okay…. I’ll close it, but I don’t know how it got open either.

Before I could snap completely out of my sleep, I realize that it was him *someone who likes me*, he was wondering too how did my door get open. Then I remembered that I was about to take my trash to the compactor but it was someone in the hall and my night dress was short, so I came back in and “thought” I closed the door good. Then at some point I decided to take a nap before I leave out at 4:30, realizing that I didn’t close it all the way. I guess this is the part that has me WEIRD all day.

After he closed the door… I went right into a dream, where I was coming out of the shower… naked… and there he was. He threw me to my floor and raped me. Aint that something, he was saying you’re going to learn to stop telling men who like you, that you are celibate. I was so shocked. I woke up after so long into the dream and felt weird all day. I did text him and tell him that I was sorry for screaming, he understood. But now when I see him working in the building…. I KNOW IM GOING TO FEEL WEIRDDDDDDDDDDDDD as I look and talk to him. So, I guess the lesson in that dream is to be careful what I share.

Well, on my way to take a bath, and yes the door is locked. LOL Going to read my bible and lay on the couch afterwards. I’m enjoying these days off.

Be Blessed!!!

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Temptation *stay away from places that will tempt you*

temptation_feat_02-02-57-07_crSo, Tyler Perry movie will be out tomorrow night. I’m there!!! This is the PERFECT movie for ME at this time in my life. * GO AND SEE THIS MOVIE*… THIS WEEKEND!!!

 

As I’ve shared before…..I met this guy who I’m really crazy about, haven’t liked a guy like this in years. It takes a special man to get my attention, and he was the one. He’s honest and up front, and that’s what I LOVE most about him. He told me some really deep things yesterday, that I respect. These are situations that was there before me. This also play apart of me knowing that he is NOT the one for me. Even though we talk a lot, I do not plan to see him anymore in a way that we had before.

 

At my age 45, I refuse to continue to be in someone’s life when I know they are NOT for me. I’m just waiting for the one God has for me. I have never been the type of woman to have a man for the sake of “having a man”. I want to look at him and admire him. His eyes, his lips, his smile, his facial expression, his kindness, his tone of voice, his touch, his SMELL, his kiss…. even the way he wears his hair, and facial hair. They say VIRGOS LOVE hard…. I find this to be true when we’re with people whom we truly love and admire. I can never just “pass” out my LOVE.

 

What I learned is… its okay to move on from my him. When he revealed some very important information to me, I knew he was in my life for a season. Even though he’s trying to stay in my picture, he can’t. I LOVED how I felt when I was around him. How he looked at me, how he kissed me, how he touched me. He says I’m ghetto, when I’m expressing myself because of how expressive I am, and I say “he be saying his stuff” too, because he geeks people up and then brags on himself. So funny!!! We had so much fun laughing and acting silly! I haven’t invited him into my apartment, because I don’t want to put myself in a atmosphere where I would be TEMPTED into having sex. This is so important for women to know and UNDERSTAND. I know its hard, but if you can’t see yourself marrying this man, there is no reason to give him your loving. I’m sorry. So many women are just giving themselves away, so when someone like me come along, men expect for me to be just like the others. No, no, no. I want to always be different than the other women, when a man meets me. Always!  I’ve never been to his place either. I wish I was this strong in my late 20’s. I know what I want, and who I want now that I’m in my 40’s.

I’m going to miss my friend…. I have to move on. We’re on two different pages. But he’ll  always be in my heart.

 

Be Blessed

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I’m sad :(

god has a reasonI had a wonderful day at work today. When I came home from Georgia, I didn’t want to go back to Walmart. Seems like no one understood that. Yes, I was making GOOD MONEY there, and I’m good friends with all the managers, several are on my FB page. I just didn’t want to do that. I didn’t want to be bothered with grown folks anymore. I wanted to work at a School with TEENS. I prayed, and prayed,, and prayed and prayed. As time went on, I was getting desperate and needed to work. But all my needs were being met and MORE. SO, it allowed me to hold off on making a decision to go back there. I’m so glad I waited on God. After being fingerprinted by the FBI, I am now working where I want…with Students at a High School….. I LOVE THEM!!! I have many stories to share later on this weekend. LOL

 

I’m looking forward to seeing them tomorrow because TONIGHT…. I’m sad. 😦

 

My friend * guy I like* called me tonight and told me that he got the job at the airport that he’s been waiting for. I’m so sad right now because he works a first job 7-3, and this job will be his afternoon job, so that means I won’t see him anymore after March. He says he’ll come to visit, but I know him, after working 16 hours a day, on his day off he’s going to want to sleep and be with his family. I can’t even cry, it hurts so bad.

 

I’m happy for him, because I know how he feels about this position. But dang…. Here comes this guy that I really like and he’s going to be gone from my life. He lives almost an hour away from me in the first place. This is going to be really hard for me. I’ll see him all weekend here at my job, could be therapy, or it could be tears 😦

 

But I have to be honest here. One day I walked up on him as he was reading the Bible. He looked up and said Hey! I asked what was he reading, he told me, then said…. I’ve been thinking about you. He said GOD told me something/several things ABOUT YOU… after he told me it blew my mind. All I could do is stare at him, caught me totally off guard. After that I went back to my apartment because I had to think alone about what he said.

 

I was sitting in the bathtub, and he called me. He said Lacrease are you mad at me, are you okay? Because I left so abruptly. I said yeah… I’m good. I said what you told me just blew me away. It was then while in the bathtub is when I realized AND KNEW FOR A FACT, that he was only in my life for a season and a reason. God knew it would take for someone I REALLY LIKE to come into my life and tell me what he told me. I knew THEN that eventually he would be leaving my life. I knew it. I knew it. Now that time is here. He was only in my life to share that, and I had to hear it from someone who I liked. I made him feel like everything is fine, and he never brought it up again.

 

My heart is broken AGAIN this week!* I’m a strong woman……I’ll be fine.*

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Temptation…*don’t do it Cree*

CHARSRINGToday was a great day. A day of PEACE in my apartment. I won’t see my boo anymore until Friday, which gives me time to write, and decide what I’m going to do with our friendship. If I decide to part ways with him, its going to be really sad for me because I enjoy being around him, he makes me laugh. I guess the reason why this is on my mind so tuff is because its hard for me to like someone. He is the first person that I’ve liked in years. I meet a lot of men, but either I’m not attracted to them, like they are to me, maybe its the baggage or the lifestyle.I dunno.

 

I met this guy about 2 weeks ago. I was standing in line at a gas station. When this guy walked in….. LOL He opened the door  and looked at me like I was his wife. I smiled at him because he was good looking, had personality like myself, tall dark, handsome. He could NOT stop looking at me, it made me laugh in my mind because I know how I feel when someone catch my eye, I can’t stop staring, and I can STARE. He said to me, hey pretty when you finish come back here and keep me company while I heat up my food. I looked at him like…… heat your food up. He kept talking to me while I was in line, so after I finished paying for my gas, he made sure I came back to the microwave. He’s a truck driver and he stops there at his favorite gas station to heat up his lunch. We talked and laugh, I LOVE TO TALK JUNK * not sexual* we were going back and forth. So, I hand him my phone number, as I gave it to him, I looked down and spotted his WEDDING RING! I said “you’re married?” I said um um I can’t talk to you? He said “we can just be friends!” You know men love to run that line. It was so hard, but I turned around and walked towards the door. He said No, please, SO YOURE TELLING ME I WONT EVER SEE YOU AGAIN? I said YES… you have someone, I’m not going to get to know you, while you’re married!!!!!! He was sick when I walked out of the door. It was hard too. My mom was in the truck, so as I pumped the gas, I couldn’t stop laughing in my mind, and how he kept saying…. “So I won’t ever see you again”? I said NOPE!!!

 

No sooner than I got in the truck,PUMPED MY GAS, he came out of no where, and said wait wait… He opened my car door and I looked at him like……. ARE YOU SERIOUS? He said hi moms, talking to my mother, he said I’m going to call you, saying lets be friends. He called, and when he told me who his wife was I WAS TRIPPING, She’s the daughter of a FAMOUS FAMOUS GOSPEL SINGER. That was our last conversation. I told him, we aren’t even going to get to know each other AT ALL PERIOD. I’m glad that he got the hint, and if he ever called again I wouldn’t answer my phone. Temptation is deep!!!

 

He claim he just wanted to talk and be friends.But that’s how cheating starts right? Being friends!! I would be so offended if my HUSBAND was going around meeting NEW WOMEN but at the same time attracted to her. That’s opening the door to cheating…and all types of sin. I’m NOT doing that. I know what I want. I know what I’m looking for in a man, and I’m not spending ANY of my singleness with MARRIED MEN. I don’t waste my time like that.

 

Women do the same thing!!

In other news……I’m excited about seeing TYLER PERRY’S MOVIE TEMPTATION NEXT WEEKEND! ME AND MY GURLS ARE DOING IT BIG AS WE SHUT DOWN THE MJR VANDYKE. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE me some TYLER PERRY! SO, we will support him next weekend. If you are reading this…. DO THE SAME!

 

Cree

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God made my BODY…. I will NOT be ashamed anymore

creedancingAs I sit here in a New Chapter of my life. I enjoy the fact that its only me. I love that. I can FOCUS on myself. I’ve never had time like this to really pay so much attention to who I am. Sometimes I admit I don’t know that to do with myself. LOL But one thing that has been on my mind for the longest, something so petty to the next person, but it has played a huge part of how I lived my life.

I’ve always had a beautiful shape, small waist and a behind that is noticeable. When I was young, guys who were older than me would always try to talk to me. They would always tell me how pretty I was, and how beautiful my shape was. I grew up with both my parents in the home, and my parents didn’t play that being fast mess. My daddy would kill us with his bare hands, if we were acting fast. As a matter of fact, I was shy, stayed to myself and never wanted any trouble. Because it was easy to see this in me, many men felt free to tell me about my body. I remember so clearly how people would say to me, “why is your booty so big”? This would bother me, because I hated attention, I wanted to be the gurl in the back ground. I didn’t know why my body was made this way. I didn’t know why men would look at me and want me. I didn’t know I would be molested and raped by several men in my life before I even left to be on my own at 22. I didn’t know that my body could cause so much chaos in my life.

When I was in my teens, I would always catch it with the older women about my body. They were the ones who really did me in on this subject. Making me feel that when God created me, that I was on some sort of assembly line and that I got in the “behind line” one too many times and he must have missed catching me. Making me feel as if I some how cheated and “got more” than what they had. They all made me feel so ashamed of myself. So, I started wearing extra long shirts, and sweaters to cover my body even more. I would pull at the bottom of my shirts, stretching them way out of shape. I made sure that no one saw my body anymore. Instead of wearing a regular shirt, that everyone else was wearing, I chose to wear everything long.

Its a shame how I didn’t know any better to understand that God made my body. And to tell these grown OLD women just that. I didn’t have any say on how he made it. I didn’t stand in a line to get it, I didn’t chose, beg, or pray. I didn’t do anything but come to this world to serve a purpose for HIM.

With all that said. I have gained so much weight over the years that I can’t believe that I let myself get so out of shape. As I can see myself in a different light BY LIVING ALONE AND BEING ABLE TO FOCUS ON ME. I have already started a SERIOUS workout plan to be healthy and beautiful as God has made me. I am 16 days into working out EVERYDAY. And I LOVE IT. I have never been so serious about this, and everyday I go to bed and I look forward to working out the next day, and setting short term goals…and MEETING THEM!!!!

No longer will I allow ANYONE to make me feel bad because of my body, or any thing else. Its funny how everyone had something to say about it then when I didn’t know any better, but now a days having a BIG BEHIND is in. People are getting booty shots, and DYING to have WHAT I WAS ALREADY BORN WITH.

I have and will always carry myself as woman. I will no longer misuse my body for ANYONE’S OPINION of me. If they have a problem take it up with God…. he’s my creator.

This is MY story about my BODY… but there are stories of people who are drop dead gorgeous, people who have light skin and dark skin. This is for people who have skin disorders, born without an ear, nose. For people who have large breast and people who stare at you, this is for anyone who has covered up their appearances because others made them feel bad. THIS POST IS FOR YOU!

crester

Psalms 139:14, “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.”

Cree  *photo ABOVE taken in Atlanta Georgia, July 1993

*photo here taken last month*

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